It could be argued that the language and trappings of the 'nerdish' are simply mechanics of tribalism - deeply rooted in absolutely normal human behaviour and nothing at all to worry about. It is not a surprise that your vocabulary and dress identify you to fellow members of the tribe and as something alien to those outside the tribe.
It is also common for members of tribes to reinforce negative stereotypes of those people, and those trappings, alien to their tribe. You're either in, or out. Tribe behaviour discourages people on the fringe, pretending to belong, or paying lip service.
When members of different tribes meet, you can get a very charged reaction. In this case - you have been approached by someone not of your tribe; clearly identifying you from your mode of dress and, perhaps, language. He has suggested that your way of being is inferior to his. He has, in effect, invited you to leave your tribe and join his.
You must understand that his statements are fuelled by his tribes constant reinforcement of beliefs such as "nerds cannot socialise properly" and "games are not useful". Nothing wrong with this - it helps to have a distinctive social agenda to better identify fellow tribal members.
I don't agree with forum members suggesting that you should react with violence, verbal or physical. You don't need to defend nerdishness to someone indoctinated to think that his way is better than yours. He is right from his point of view and simply wants you to accept his correctness. What he fails to see is that, from your perspective, he is missing out from a great social life and that playing games is normal for people and can be useful.
I'm sure there is common ground between the two of you. Most often the best place that can be arrived at is a polite recognition that people belong to tribes, tribes have their different beliefs and ways, and not all tribes get along, or agree.
In answer to your question - I would recommend that you 100% belong to your tribe, but also understand that other people live in different tribes with different conditioning, and sometimes you have to respect their mores and folkways.
It is also common for members of tribes to reinforce negative stereotypes of those people, and those trappings, alien to their tribe. You're either in, or out. Tribe behaviour discourages people on the fringe, pretending to belong, or paying lip service.
When members of different tribes meet, you can get a very charged reaction. In this case - you have been approached by someone not of your tribe; clearly identifying you from your mode of dress and, perhaps, language. He has suggested that your way of being is inferior to his. He has, in effect, invited you to leave your tribe and join his.
You must understand that his statements are fuelled by his tribes constant reinforcement of beliefs such as "nerds cannot socialise properly" and "games are not useful". Nothing wrong with this - it helps to have a distinctive social agenda to better identify fellow tribal members.
I don't agree with forum members suggesting that you should react with violence, verbal or physical. You don't need to defend nerdishness to someone indoctinated to think that his way is better than yours. He is right from his point of view and simply wants you to accept his correctness. What he fails to see is that, from your perspective, he is missing out from a great social life and that playing games is normal for people and can be useful.
I'm sure there is common ground between the two of you. Most often the best place that can be arrived at is a polite recognition that people belong to tribes, tribes have their different beliefs and ways, and not all tribes get along, or agree.
In answer to your question - I would recommend that you 100% belong to your tribe, but also understand that other people live in different tribes with different conditioning, and sometimes you have to respect their mores and folkways.
