kurokotetsu said:
Well, another social situation thread. I'll expose what happened to me today, and your thoughts are appriciated.
After a class at my university I sat down near a spot that I know has a decent Wi-FI signal, just as I often do. It is quite public place, near classrooms, and a some people go by, but it isn't the more transited place, so I quite like it, as I have a sense of time, while being left alone for the most part. SO after half an hour sitting against a culumn and just messing around (and looking about LCS inner workings) a girl sits opposite of me. I notice her and go on my bussiness, only noticing that she is sniffing. Must be either a cold (a virsu has been floating around) or crying I tell myself. As the Internet isn't that good, I look away form the screen from time to time. Now I'm not great at body language, but her covering her eyes and all around sad look tells me that she is probably really sad. Well, I feel bad for her. And I start thinking, maybe I should go there. I see no friends coming for her, and she may need a kind hand. But people handle giref diferently. I would never show that emotioin public and if someone saw me, I wouldn't like that person coming over, probably thanking their kindness but moving away as fast as possible. But maybe she needs someone just the hear her pain and share it, even if it is a stranger. I'm confused. I constantly look over her wondering what to do. I think she noticed me looking, but didn't mind. If I could only say, she might be even showing a glance that may be that calling for help. But I'm not good at interpretation of others emotions and I'm afraid of hurting her further. I just keep refreshing my browser and playing some causal game. I'm afraid that I may be seeing things that I want to see, as I found since the first moment that I found her atractive, and approaching her to sooth her pain, even if the main concious motivation is to help a fellow student, my unconcious may be playing tricks on me. I have no answer. Finally after staring to my screen for a while, she is gone.
And I've been feeling bad the whole day. I'm quite sure that I went at it the most awful way possible, as I both showed that I saw her pain (maybe not leaving her in thelevel of solitude that she might've wanted) nor acting upon it (maybe not giving her the support that se may have needed in a bad place). I don't like being in a position where I may have incremented her pain.
You weren't under any obligations to benefit her and she asked nothing of you. Furthermore, going to a total stranger in a time of grief is pretty ridiculous - even homeless people have a social life and usually have friends to turn to. Almost every university student (your assumption, not mine) in the world has a social structure which has allowed them to get into the university in the first place - it's not like a total stranger is needed for consolation.
Lots of people dream of being White Knights these days, and lots of people beat themselves up for not being White Knighty enough to soothe their expanded egos. They fear that if they're not a White Knight they're a Black Knight.
Therefore more young women become Damsels in Distress, to appeal to all the White Knightery going around. So quite possibly she was looking to meet someone, or even "hook up with" someone, as universities are not exactly the most sexually moral places in the world, and was strategically using her sadness to further that goal instead of turning to mom and dad.
When you "failed" to be the White Knight she was "looking for", she moved on, possibly to collect more sadness she's generating through her own duplicity in order to fuel her DiD status, until she successfully captures a White Knight, whose ego can then be super-boosted by his "saving" of the attractive Damsel.
People should just be people, dealing with each other honestly and straightforwardly. Fuck Damsels, fuck White Knights, fuck superheroes, fuck everything within humanity that isn't human.
Good luck to you in the future. You'll be needing it.
