"Ohoho Lieutenant Steve."

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Cherry Cola

Your daddy, your Rock'n'Rolla
Jun 26, 2009
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[HEADING=1]"I'm so freakin' funny sometimes it's unbelievable.."[/HEADING]

ADMIT IT! You've had that thought in your head! Or if not, something similar. The point is, every single one of us (Except possibly Furburt) has had a moment were they thought they made the funniest joke ever. Of all time.


"OF ALL TIME!"

Oh shut up Kanye, your meme has grown old and stagnant!

[sub]Oh I'm so great...[/sub]

SEE!? That was an example. I just thought I was hilarious, yet you all probably think it was a poor attempt at humor. Which it probably is, except perhaps for people still thinking "THIS IS SPARTA" is comedic gold.

If you fail to see the point of this thread as of yet, I am of course asking you what moments of irrational pride you've had over yourselves over making a joke that might or might not have been incredibly awesome and funny. Both kinds are appreciated, however I would like to remind everyone that the worse the joke is, the more fun we others have laughing at you.

Because really, who wants to laugh with someone?

[HEADING=3]And as a side not, anyone catching the reference in the title gets a cookie[/HEADING]
 

delet

New member
Nov 2, 2008
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At my lunch table the best conversations always start with the worst Jew joke.
You don't have to pay the calculator!

Because I'm the 'resident Jew' there, they often say this joke a lot. The best part is that we often say it in unison in the same idiotic tone of voice.

It's such a horrible, idiotic joke that it has actually become brilliant...
 

Trifixion

Infamous Scribbler
Oct 13, 2009
635
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Ergh, I sometimes make jokes that require people to know some references I assume they know...and they don't (Example: "So Rene Descartes is sitting at the bar. Someone asks him 'hey, will ya buy me a beer?' and Descartes replies 'I think not!' Then he disappeared.")...and then I feel dumb about it, if that counts.

Even if it doesn't, I want my cookie, so the title reference is Good Morning, Vietnam.
 

Uncreative

New member
Oct 29, 2009
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First thing comes to mind is when I typed out all of the lyrics to Voltaire's BRAINS! during the zombie invasion in World of Warcraft...

 

Cherry Cola

Your daddy, your Rock'n'Rolla
Jun 26, 2009
11,938
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Trifixion said:
Ergh, I sometimes make jokes that require people to know some references I assume they know...and they don't (Example: "So Rene Descartes is sitting at the bar. Someone asks him 'hey, will ya buy me a beer?' and Descartes replies 'I think not!' Then he disappeared.")...and then I feel dumb about it, if that counts.

Even if it doesn't, I want my cookie, so the title reference is Good Morning, Vietnam.
A COOKIE FOR YOU!

data:image/jpg;base64,/9j/4AAQSkZJRgABAQAAAQABAAD/2wBDAAkGBwgHBgkIBwgKCgkLDRYPDQwMDRsUFRAWIB0iIiAdHx8kKDQsJCYxJx8fLT0tMTU3Ojo6Iys/RD84QzQ5Ojf/2wBDAQoKCg0MDRoPDxo3JR8lNzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzf/wAARCABOAE4DASIAAhEBAxEB/8QAGwABAAIDAQEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAQFAwYHAgH/xAAwEAACAQMDAgUEAQMFAAAAAAABAgMABBEFEiExQQYTUXGhFCJhgZEH0fAjMkJSwf/EABkBAAIDAQAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADAQQFAv/EAB8RAAMAAgIDAQEAAAAAAAAAAAABAgMRITEEEkETQv/aAAwDAQACEQMRAD8A7hSlKAFKVHu7yCzi8ydwq9vU1DaS2yUtvSJFKoLvxbpdqAZJGznGOMj84zmslv4jtblVeEbkYZBDdaQ/Kwr+hiw5H8LulRbW9huAdpIPoalZps3NrcvYtpy9MUNKGuyBSlfDQBXa7rNrodkbu9J8vcqgLjOScd65xqF9f63frfvdGG0DHy4V6geh9Onofep/ia9OvXlzAjj6aImLqRkjGccfP9qrFBRmi3YGAT1J+PasvyPIdblF3DjU8srdWsNRub+3mt1iYsCjM7YA/wCrY745qx0z6uztY7RlVGiAQuylsYPJxkdeoP5FTVVJELIoHPHPQ/ivkc8gkxMMgjbyO2e9VXVNJP4O62y0juZIF82OUyKFy4xjOO/6/wDa2TR9UWaNQzZB+K1G2mSCNhKoVA20gkcZOM5NSdM3RTukb/ZFIwU8crk4+OP0a5m6xV7SFSrWmb/Q1F06bz7ZWzkjipXat3HauVS+mbS9XpisV1IYraWQDJRCwHsKy15dQ6MrcgjBrp9EI45qtxNBbG6jj8wKclVbBAJxnpXmyuxcxgXcnl3XCqx6HPIUeuR8mvPi/wA2whvLIBtzDyFxkdT1/jmqmyu57HTo7y7+mdF27ASQ7c84PTOCT+qx5h6aZoN88Gy2d0vBZXGeAB2NZb53CMYyCSCFYnABqvS+s7lPPhuIwTglehB9vWvJv4zdfSJsM+N21mIH84PP+fil6rfRO1oh6aNQMjQ39pcFZv8Ae7hmRsDHXkYIHxVxoMiaYl5bRvvMc4kj9mC4Gfc/5mssF6Y4cv8AaAQdpPANUUmqNc61JNaRJtJVNucGTaCdwzgex6cY9COmqy70tEy1PZ1vwxuOmqXZS/AYr03Y5+TVx2qt0GwbT9OSJ2LSN97k+pA4/WBVl2rVwQ4xqWUcte1tilKU4War400Bb+H663TNzCOQByy/j8j5Fc01GxsBaLKFW2mj3YZc7ee4Xp2rutapr/gax1ZmkimktJCc4QBkJ9v7Gqebx3Ve0FjHm0vWjjVnpl3fSzSxOqwuDGzFcqwPPT91bxaNdWt3HdWjINiBD5gz3HIq/XwVrenxmBQ9zGrEq0bDGM56Zz/NYbLRPEdxIyNptxFGrf6e/wC0t+Tnj5pFfrvj4NTjRBlnhtLNI7xZQXcqylcbixP2jtjn+Kuv6f8AhK3a7S8uY5X8o7wsh+1R/wAV689jz2FXFj4JmvQDrUm1AwPkqQxOPXsPmt2tbaG0hWG3QJGowAKZgwV3XBxlyz0uTMOlDShq+VRSlKAFKUoAU4pSgBilKUAKGlDQB//Z

... Jesus fuck the url for that picture was long.
 

Threx

Senior Member
Nov 9, 2009
611
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21
We were once on a field trip and wee ha to fallow this tour guide who's name was Gordon. So at an attempt at a joke I shouted "Fallow Freeman". Everyone decided to correct me and tell me his name is Gordon not Freeman.
 

Kushin

New member
May 17, 2009
457
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Mackheath said:
Well, the worst joke I told was about either; 1. An Indian, Pakistani and Chinaman in the
ocean, or
2. The Jewish Boyscouts.

Both nearly got me a punch and detentions in school.
Anything that bad? Just use spoiler tags, you've made me curious now.

OT: My worst joke that i've gotten away with sans injury would be:-

"Yesterday, a woman was run over by a motorcycle and killed. Police are still investigating how the motorcycle got into the kitchen."

*raises shield* Please dont hate me.
 

Cherry Cola

Your daddy, your Rock'n'Rolla
Jun 26, 2009
11,938
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0
Kushin said:
Mackheath said:
Well, the worst joke I told was about either; 1. An Indian, Pakistani and Chinaman in the
ocean, or
2. The Jewish Boyscouts.

Both nearly got me a punch and detentions in school.
Anything that bad? Just use spoiler tags, you've made me curious now.

OT: My worst joke that i've gotten away with sans injury would be:-

"Yesterday, a woman was run over by a motorcycle and killed. Police are still investigating how the motorcycle got into the kitchen."

*raises shield* Please dont hate me.
I don't hate you.

I just pity you because of your lack of humor

*shakes head in shame*
 

Quaxar

New member
Sep 21, 2009
3,947
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Trifixion said:
Ergh, I sometimes make jokes that require people to know some references I assume they know...and they don't (Example: "So Rene Descartes is sitting at the bar. Someone asks him 'hey, will ya buy me a beer?' and Descartes replies 'I think not!' Then he disappeared.")...and then I feel dumb about it, if that counts.
Same for me. Wheather it be game references, books or just plain bash.org, people normally never get it.
Still, I prefer to welcome guests with a nice 'Greetings, programs!', you never know... at some point someone will get it an laugh... it's just a waiting game now.

btw I thought that Descartes joke was hilarious
 

rt052192

New member
Feb 24, 2010
1,376
0
0
Kushin said:
Mackheath said:
Well, the worst joke I told was about either; 1. An Indian, Pakistani and Chinaman in the
ocean, or
2. The Jewish Boyscouts.

Both nearly got me a punch and detentions in school.
Anything that bad? Just use spoiler tags, you've made me curious now.

OT: My worst joke that i've gotten away with sans injury would be:-

"Yesterday, a woman was run over by a motorcycle and killed. Police are still investigating how the motorcycle got into the kitchen."

*raises shield* Please dont hate me.
hey i think the joke with the woman and the motorcycle is a riot
 

Casual Shinji

Should've gone before we left.
Legacy
Jul 18, 2009
20,973
5,852
118
"Ya see, she wanted a little one, because her's was as.........................[small]big as a house[/small]."

I always loved Hawkins' not-funny jokes in Predator.
 

Hollock

New member
Jun 26, 2009
3,282
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0
In fifth grade my class was reading a book and every day we came in after reading a new chapter I had a dumb joke about what had happened. I did it everyday and by the end it was actually getting funnier. But the only one I remember was after the chapter where a guy went blind I said "I bet he didn't see that one coming!"