phoenix352 said:
You described my own room just fine thus I am often deprived of a small thing I cherish more than most people. Just because you can handle it does not mean anybody can or ever will. SERIOUSLY NO OFFENSE!phoenix352 said:
Parents+Privacy=0
- Thread starter Saulkar
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I lucked out with two complete idiots when it comes to computers, so there's a plus when it comes to online privacy. They used to be constantly on me about it, like complaining about how I was killing my eyes and whatnot, before I put my computer into my room. Ever since then, they've kinda just backed off and let me do my thing, which is nice. I keep connections with family friends online, but the safe haven that is the internet is pretty much secured for me. I can be myself, the self that society doesn't deem audibly appropriate (blame the FCC) and has a wit sharper than William MacDonald's knives.
Which is why I moved out at the first possible opportunity, and moved 1000 kilometers.
If they want to visit they'll have to spend 20 hours on a train.
If they want to visit they'll have to spend 20 hours on a train.
Once more, I thought the problem of privacy with parents was non-existent. If I felt my parents were ever crowding me, they'd back off if I asked.Saulkar said:
Here's my little secret: When around your parents, tell them as much as you possibly can. You'll be surprised how much there is to tell them without sharing your more secret information. I pretty much got my privacy by telling them more than they cared to hear about. Because of that, they don't feel the need to go looking into my personal life.
I used to be in the same boat as you (and also effectively high-functioning autistic) - even with my own PC, my mum was wanting to know what I was up to, in too much detail. In the end, I developed the ability to be doing two things at once - one that would satisfy my parents and what I was actually doing.
I also discovered the wonders of a multidesktop environment, with a key combo to switch desktops.
With gaming, my parents didn't mind me playing games, but my mum didn't really like the games I was playing, so I'd have to pause the game when she came in my room (she's not good with gorey movies, let alone games). That got annoying sometimes, if she had to come in my room a few times ><.
My mum did get really funny with MMOs though. She does sort of believe in the internet-is-full-of-predators bit. I've now played MMOs for a few years now, and nothing's happened to me, and in fact, had far worse things happen with people I met in RL than people I met online :/.
My mum wasn't very good at giving me space, and she didn't accept that sometimes I want to be alone. I remember arguing with my mum that I didn't want to eat breakfast with her, because I prefer to eat breakfast alone (and still do to this day). I don't mind talking after I eat, but I want eats first, preferably in peace and quiet. This was probably when I was 22 >< (I remember it being after uni, but before I moved out).
I also discovered the wonders of a multidesktop environment, with a key combo to switch desktops.
With gaming, my parents didn't mind me playing games, but my mum didn't really like the games I was playing, so I'd have to pause the game when she came in my room (she's not good with gorey movies, let alone games). That got annoying sometimes, if she had to come in my room a few times ><.
My mum did get really funny with MMOs though. She does sort of believe in the internet-is-full-of-predators bit. I've now played MMOs for a few years now, and nothing's happened to me, and in fact, had far worse things happen with people I met in RL than people I met online :/.
My mum wasn't very good at giving me space, and she didn't accept that sometimes I want to be alone. I remember arguing with my mum that I didn't want to eat breakfast with her, because I prefer to eat breakfast alone (and still do to this day). I don't mind talking after I eat, but I want eats first, preferably in peace and quiet. This was probably when I was 22 >< (I remember it being after uni, but before I moved out).
my friend has a much worse situation than you i think.
Nit trying to 1up your story but he isnt allowed to shut any doors in the house- no bathroom doors or anything.
theres invasive, then theres just creepy.
Nit trying to 1up your story but he isnt allowed to shut any doors in the house- no bathroom doors or anything.
theres invasive, then theres just creepy.
Saulkar said:
Nah, it was from gmod idiot box 2:
But it could be worse. I can't even imagine her reaction when she'd see a zombie or chell humping the companion cube.
Heh. I once had a lock in my doors, but after i locked it once as a child, dad removed lock from doors. And there is no lock in my bathroom.Darkgoosey666 said:
Wow, this kind of argument get's on my nerves more than almost anything else. Partly because it cannot be applied to every situation where someone could be upset with something their parents are doing, like in the extreme case of child abuse (NOTE: this comparison is making use of hyperbole for effect). You act like the fact that they provide shelter excuses any action that they do (again not that I think this situation is anywhere near as bad as child abuse). While this is not child abuse it IS bad parenting to never let your child have any of a social life to keep to himself IMHO. Besides, if a kid is dependent on his parents and doesn't like something they do, what's he supposed to do, run away? try to live on the street? It's not like we're talking about some 25-30 year old who just doesn't WANT to move out, we're talking about people who probably CAN'T move out. [/rant]Pirate Kitty said:
I shut the door, really. But unfortunately my house is seriously made out of paper, because shutting out sound is impossible. I love singing, for example, but I can't sing when mom's home(which she always is), because then she'll yell at me for annoying her. Also I can't stay up too late, because she can hear me type on the keyboard through the wall.
But I'm a pretty damn open person, I see no reason to hide things from, well, anyone really(unless it's mean things, I don't tell someone I think can sometimes be annoying that they're annoying pricks), so besides the lack of verbal privacy, I don't have much to complain about, especially since I usually get left alone when I'm at the comp.
You could just tell your parents if you want some privacy though. Tell them you want to be left alone for a while and that you would appreciate it if they respected that.
But I'm a pretty damn open person, I see no reason to hide things from, well, anyone really(unless it's mean things, I don't tell someone I think can sometimes be annoying that they're annoying pricks
), so besides the lack of verbal privacy, I don't have much to complain about, especially since I usually get left alone when I'm at the comp.You could just tell your parents if you want some privacy though. Tell them you want to be left alone for a while and that you would appreciate it if they respected that.
I thought i mad it clear that i wasn't seriously stating that this was in any way near as bad as child abuse as I said it THREE TIMES IN THE POST. I was using it for hyperbole. Also you didn't address any of the questions that I tried to ask.Pirate Kitty said:
You mind explaining how my question about what a kid is supposed to do if he disagrees with a parent is irrelevant? A lot of these kids aren't able to leave and live on their own, which is why they live with their parents. Like I said in my first post, if this was someone in their late 20s or early 30s my opinion would be different, but because these teenagers don't really have much choice in the matter, i think they do have a right to complain somewhat. Are there people in worse situations? yes. Does that mean having a smothering or overprotective parent doesn't suck? no.Pirate Kitty said:
Wow, I can see this is getting nowhere. its becoming more and more obvious to me that you are either incredibly stubborn and closed minded, or you are currently trolling. I tried to be civil. I tried to make an actual argument, and all you have done is respond with "NO, YOU'RE WRONG" without adding any points to back it up. Let me try to make this point one more time. Just because they are legally allowed to do something doesn't make it right or good parenting. This combined with the fact that these so called "spoiled teenagers" are usually unable to move out and live by themselves gives them a right to complain.Pirate Kitty said:
My mom is a bit socially awkward and doesn't really know how to act normally about frivolous things. Like my brother went off to college and joins a fraternity and nows she basically sits on Facebook (actually she always does that) and basically scans his profile to see if he is drinking. He comes home for Thanksgiving this week and he gets 20 questions about drinking. It's just annoying. I was apprehensive of adding her as a friend on Facebook because I thought she wouldn't give me any privacy, but she was good at first. After a while she started commenting on everything I did and it became annoying. One day I was sitting in our dining room, where our family computer is, and my mom was looking at the profiles of my friends and that was the point where I felt she crossed the line. I deleted her because I felt if she couldn't trust me enough she didn't have to watch over me. I didn't go on for a month it drove her crazy.
A better analogy would be that your house or car gets damaged by a hailstorm. your car gets dented or you have to replace your shingles. sure you can't do anything about it, and it does suck, but you have every right to be annoyed or angry. My original post was supposed to be directed at the type of people who say "You have no right to complain, you're just a spoiled kid there are tons of people out there in worse situations so get a job and man up." All i'm trying to say is that these people have the right to be annoyed or frustrated.If you don't belong to the group i thought i was addressing, I apologize. If you do, I hope you see my pointPirate Kitty said:
Because parents have the right to be totalitarians, because they spawned you? Hardly.Pirate Kitty said:
I live with my mother and brother and we always respect eachother's privacy. No one likes it to have their privacy invaded, be it because of curiosity or 'monitoring'. If you want to know something, ask. If someone doesn't tell you, he or she has a good reason not to.