Pickup Lines That Shouldn't Have Worked, But Did.

[Eggsnham]

Was bored. Decided to make thread. Comment in thread.

My friend once used a pickup line to the effect of:

"Hey, baby. Are you looking for property? Because I'm a real estate agent and I've got an opening on "Boner Street."

That really shouldn't have worked and probably wouldn't have worked if it were anybody else. They're still in a relationship.

Stories, commence!

 

[Jimmycanuck]

"Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you?"

She didn't actually smell the cloth, but she appreciated the humour.

 

[Betancore]

Hmm I got asked a similar question today. The only one that has actually worked on me was 'I've lost my phone number, can I have yours instead?' But that was after I'd been talking to him for a while, and we were both about to leave and it was kind of awkward because I didn't know if I should leave him with a way to contact me or not. The way he said it was really cute. So I gave it to him.

 

[Eggsnham]

"Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you?"

She didn't actually smell the cloth, but she appreciated the humour.

That one's actually pretty hilarious!

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

I've never really asked anyone out. And if I were gonna, I would not use pick-up lines outside of satire.

I used to like to cut in while my friends were picking up girls and say something wildly inappropriate, though. Usually along the lines of suggesting there was some sort of depraved orgy planned.
I have heard this sometimes turned out positively for them. Which made it less fun.
I have also heard this resulted in girls looking for me. Which made me decide to never ever do anything like that again.

 

[the Dept of Science]

More situational openers work better generally or genuine but not generic compliments. Or really anything that doesn't scream "I read this off a website" or "I want to sex you lol".

Although, when I ask for a number I say "hey, you don't mind if I call you 4 or 5 times a day and breath real heavy down the phone?" because that normally takes away any thought that I might actually do that.

 

[Superbeast]

Slide up to a girl in a bar, who has a drink from which she has imbibed.

" 'Scuse me love, has the Rohypnol kicked in yet?"

 

[Julianking93]

No pickup lines should ever work. Period.

 

[Chogg Van Helsing]

my friend once said to a girl

"so... how's your underwear?"
"um... fine?"
"cool. is it kinky?"

thankfully she didnt take offence lol. something could have happened, if it werent for the intervention of some ass hole ¬_¬

 

[end_boss]

Take with a grain of salt, because this is a "friend of a friend" story, but comes from someone I consider a reliable source.

But apparently, my friend's friend is now married to the woman he met at work. She was bending over to pick something up, so he slapped her on the ass and shouted "What's up, toots?"

And it took off from there.

 

[Voodoo_Person]

My friend once used the line 'So, do you like Dragons?' on some girl in a bar, and it fucking worked

 

[JEBWrench]

Well, I have my brother's story of a former teammate.

The line: "Fuck me if I'm wrong, but is your name Gretchen?"
The response: "You're in luck, my name's not Gretchen."

 

[Crabcakes]

my friend once used

"if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put YOU and ME together."

The girl seemed to be very faltered by this, I missed what happened next due to laughing so hard.

 

[Sixties Spidey]

"Is that ass from Mc.Donald's? Because I'm lovin' it!"

Amazingly enough, I got closer to her (as a friend I mean) using that.

 

[Jackalb]

"Is that ass from Mc.Donald's? Because I'm lovin' it!"

Amazingly enough, I got closer to her (as a friend I mean) using that.

Stealing this. I have no shame.

 

[Lord Mountbatten Reborn]

I've never really asked anyone out. And if I were gonna, I would not use pick-up lines outside of satire.

I used to like to cut in while my friends were picking up girls and say something wildly inappropriate, though. Usually along the lines of suggesting there was some sort of depraved orgy planned.
I have heard this sometimes turned out positively for them. Which made it less fun.
I have also heard this resulted in girls looking for me. Which made me decide to never ever do anything like that again.

Not used as a pick-up line, but I remember two friends of mine were all busy making out, so I stood close to them, put on my best "Scary Yorkshireman Voice" and said, "Man, you guys are loud!"

My preferred line is, in a Scottish accent (accents are fun), shouting, "I find ya' dead sexay!" Surprisingly enough, it hasn't worked yet. Perhaps girls don't like Scotsmen.

Edit: Hm, didn't notice my 3000th post. Lord Mountbatten shall prevail.

 

[DSK-]

My dad's personal faves are:

"Do you have a mirror in your knickers?...because I can see me in them!"

"I'll tell you now how I like my eggs in the morning...fertilised"

Of course he has tried numerous times to get me to say such things. I know better

 

[Chiefmon]

My friend tried this one.
"Do you want an Australian kiss? It's like a French one, but down under."