Pimpin Reviews: Dominos Pizza Turnaround >A so stupid its funny review<

[BloodyThoughts]

I stick to my local Little Ceasurs(did I get it right?) pizza. 5 bucks for one large pizza and the pizza is fucking amazing.
Pimp, great review. It had me laughing my ass off and it even made some really good points. All of which I agree with. Good for you!

 

[Marine Mike]

I'm drunk, but it doesn't change the fact that your review is hilarious. I personally enjoy their new pizza, but thats probably because I was used to their old pizza and its not hard to impress someone with standards that low.

EDIT: Suddenly people are showing up with banners with bullet holes... Hmmm..

 

[Pimppeter2]

EDIT: Suddenly people are showing up with banners with bullet holes... Hmmm..

Hahaha, I was going to point that out in your latest review.

.....I started this review series about a year ago though

But we can share bullet hole banners! I mean, seeing as we're both so goddamn awesome.

 

[TheNumber1Zero]

-Snip-

Why does your Banner contain bullet holes?

 

[Pimppeter2]

-Snip-

Why does your Banner contain bullet holes?

I dunno, [user]Labyrinth[/user] made a couple options for me. We agreed the one without bullet holes seemed to plain, and the other ones didn't work all that well. And thus, I picked this one.

 

[TheNumber1Zero]

I dunno, [user]Labyrinth[/user] made a couple options for me. We agreed the one without bullet holes seemed to plain, and the other ones didn't work all that well. And thus, I picked this one.

Makes sense I suppose.

Now on to more pressing manners, the Review of the pizza place in K-mart, will you handle it?

 

[Raven's Nest]

I work for Dominos woop...

No it's quite depressing actually, I just escaped 4 years of servitude, only to take a year out and return once again... Today as a matter of fact... But there is one thing I can say with certainty...

[HEADING=1]I make the best [small](Domino's)[/small] pizza out of everyone on the Escapist...[/HEADING]

That's right, I'll testify that in court!

 

[Marine Mike]

EDIT: Suddenly people are showing up with banners with bullet holes... Hmmm..

Hahaha, I was going to point that out in your latest review.

.....I started this review series about a year ago though

But we can share bullet hole banners! I mean, seeing as we're both so goddamn awesome.

Indeed, because bullet holes are the universal sign of badassery.

[pissing contest]
...but since my banner has more bullet holes, that makes me more awesome!
[/pissing contest]

On a serious note, I wasn't even expecting bullet holes on my banner but it looked good and I went with it... and I'm glad Billy Ray didn't pull out in time, because its gonna be hilarious when Hanna Montana goes the way of the Olsen (Olson?) twins and starts blowing lines as long as Interstate 90.

 

[Pimppeter2]

-Snip-

Why does your Banner contain bullet holes?

I dunno, [user]Labyrinth[/user] made a couple options for me. We agreed the one without bullet holes seemed to plain, and the other ones didn't work all that well. And thus, I picked this one.

The correct answer was:
"Because Pimpin' ain't easy!"

[sub]*Shakes head*[/sub] Missed opportunity...

Dammit!

[pissing contest]
...but since my banner has more bullet holes, that makes me more awesome!
[/pissing contest]

Can't argue with that logic

 

[BlueInkAlchemist]

Dammit.

Now I want pizza.

Bastard.

 

[Korten12]

snip

great review, tweet a game for you to review, I hope I did it right. just did @PimpinReviews then the game and consoles and such.

 

[Fightgarr]

I think the title could use some work. While being accurate enough to the review in question, it implies that the reader is too stupid to realize the review is blatantly tongue-in-cheek. I like the Hey Joe-style of storytelling as a review with comments based around the story-telling, and it's a fun enough read. The tangents get a bit overdone sometimes, especially with the "where was I?" comments. It's very off-the-cuff and with a bit of polish you'd do well enough as a humorist. You may not believe it, since I think I come off a bit dull or deadpan on the forums, but I do stand-up comedy and if I one piece of humor-based advice it's that your jokes stick out a bit too much. Your reliance on the absurd could be brought down a bit and the humor would shine through brilliantly. Remember, humor is about 3 or 4 parts set-up 1 part laughs.

Edit: Also, I think your banner would look sweet with watermarked raining money in a slightly darker red.

 

[Stranger of Sorts]

Nice review there, I'm afraid I wasn't too much of a fan of your humour but that's probably because I have Dave on demand. And Dave is awesome.

What was funny though was the advert. If that was aired in England everyone would stop going to Dominoes on the premise that it's now "a bit gay". I am really hungry now though, might order me a Dominoes.

 

[GrinningManiac]

GODDAMN IT YOU STUPID YANKS

There's an "H" in "Herb". Like "Her", as in those womanly things you find in kitchens, but with a "Buh" at the end
"Herb"

Not "Erb"

That's an involuntary noise inbred farmers make

"Oi Gut Moi Combine Harvester...Errrrrrrb, and Izza Reee-ahl bee-yootee"

OT: Hilarious

I request in this order:

Napoleon Total War
Democracy
McDonalds

 

[Pimppeter2]

snip

great review, tweet a game for you to review, I hope I did it right. just did @PimpinReviews then the game and consoles and such.

Sorry, it's not showing up.

Make sure it is @PimpinReviews: *Insert info*

 

[Korten12]

snip

great review, tweet a game for you to review, I hope I did it right. just did @PimpinReviews then the game and consoles and such.

Sorry, it's not showing up.

Make sure it is @PimpinReviews: *Insert info*

okay did it again, its correct this time I believe. also when you read it, when I said its all co-op, meaning you can play alone with AI, but the AI isnt very smart.

 

[Pimppeter2]

snip

great review, tweet a game for you to review, I hope I did it right. just did @PimpinReviews then the game and consoles and such.

Sorry, it's not showing up.

Make sure it is @PimpinReviews: *Insert info*

okay did it again, its correct this time I believe. also when you read it, when I said its all co-op, meaning you can play alone with AI, but the AI isnt very smart.

Odd, its not working.

Just fire me a PM with the info. I'll count it as the same as a twitter message.