Poem Topic Help?

[Slash Dementia]

I've been trying hard to write poetry since early last year, but I've only really written about one subject: love. I don't know what else to write about, but have recently tried writing a poem that strayed strongly from the subject, and it's one of cannibalism. Maybe it was because I watched three Hannibal Lecter movies. Can I have some opinions about my poem, or subjects that I could write about?

-Cannibalistic Intent

Spoiler

A small blade, reflecting a single ray of light on its point,
Being held firmly in the callus-ridden hands of a humanoid figure
With violent intent.
A grimace, crack-lipped, awkward, salivating smile
Carved from cheek to cheek
Widening as the blade falls closer.

Closer
To caress the skin of still warm
Body laying motionless upon the bright green grass;
Neck lightly glittered with a crimson red scarf
That trickles down from grass
To ground.

Eyes giving a dead stare to the sky,
Reflecting the prey?s disturbing outline
In the iris and pupil.
And without flinching--
With no motion whatsoever--
The blade sinks.

Down from the sternum
To the lower abdomen--
The blade glides easily.
A gentle movement of the hands
To place the sharpened steel on the ground--
Its purpose fulfilled.

Hands to the ground,
And lips upon the newly placed wound.
Legs and neck tense,
And teeth are closed on a flap of freshly cut,
Unappetizing skin--
Dinner commences.

Violent pulls tear flesh in a jagged, yet artful, motion;
Pushes further the tear and reveal the maze of
Intestines, muscle, nerves and veins.
A cannibalistic intent pursued to completion,
And a hunger satisfied more
And more.

Blood dripping from the chin,
Flesh caught between the morbid teeth of prey;
But eyes fixed upon the scraps,
Gleaming joyfully
As a child would
When given sweets.

Blade softly recovered from untainted grounds,
The bloated cannibal gleefully skips
Across the picturesque scene of the sun
Sprouting its last rays of light through the sporadically placed trees
On a late spring evening
As the corpse remains slowly begin to decompose.

 

[zehydra]

Some love life you got there...
edit: lol sorry didn't thoroughly read post.

Anyhoo, what makes you angry?

 

[DeadlyYellow]

The best poetry isn't forced. It's inspired.

 

[szs0061]

don't write about a subject, just write

 

[Slash Dementia]

@DeadlyYellow and szs0061
That is good advice, and I've been doing that, but I just get frustrated that I can't think of something and want to write. I'm always wanting to write, but I feel that I over-use a subject and it makes me feel odd.

Some love life you got there...
edit: lol sorry didn't thoroughly read post.

Anyhoo, what makes you angry?

I write poems to my girlfriend at least once a month (if not, more). That poem was simply to try something new. And not that much makes me angry..so I wouldn't know what to do there.

 

[Kpt._Rob]

I'm really not sure what to make of that poem. It's executed decently, but I really don't think that a poem is the right medium for the story you're trying to tell with it. I don't want to say that a good poem could not be written about a cannibal, but I don't think this is it. See, the cannibal that you've presented here is somewhat of a schlock character, straight out of the Hannibal Lector movies you indicated might be in part responsible for inspiring the poem. And I just don't think that's a story that works well in the poetic medium.

Poetry, because it's so difficult to write, and does not tend to be popular with general audiences, has tended towards the high art end of the spectrum (and even when it's not, it's only doing that to criticize high art, which, ironically, makes it high art). And this poem doesn't seem to be high art. If you ever take a poetry class you'll be told that you can break any rule in poetry (as in any other artform), but if you're going to break a rule, you better be ready to back up why you did it.

The rule you've broken here is that you've just given a face value aesthetic narrative exploration of a cannibal. That's fine if you're writing a story, a screenplay, or even just doing some pop art... but there's not a big market for pop-poetry. For a poem to explore the idea of a cannibal it has to do something more than just tell a story about a cannibal in pretty words. Maybe the cannibal is a metaphor for something the author struggles with, maybe the author tries to show the reader how they're not as different as they think from the cannibal (in order to shake their world view), maybe the author wants to point out that we have a large world religion which claims to be practicing cannibalism when they eat their lord and savior every Sunday [please don't flame me, I'm hardly the first person to point this out, I actually draw the example from a poem someone wrote when I was in a creative writing class].

The point that I'm laboriously working my way towards is that there is no audience for a poem like this, most people who read poetry read it because they like the depth it tends to have. Simple narrative doesn't work in poetry, so if you want to write a poem you have to dig deep. Until you do that, this poem is just going to come off as mildly disturbed, and is more likely to convince people around you that you should go into therapy than it is to impress anyone.

If you really want to write poetry, you should take a class, read from established contemporary poets, and take the time to think about things that are important enough to you to be worth putting the effort into expressing with one of the more difficult mediums.

 

[noxymoron19]

Whenever I can't think of a topic for a speech or poetry, I just conjure up the most boring thing I can think of in my head and write about it. Last 2 i did were Toast and Paper airplanes. Worked out fine for me. Got over 80s, try that out if your stuck.

 

[SilentCom]

When I do my writing, I typically write about what I'm feeling at the moment. This is usually when I'm feeling some strong emotions and don't really know how to bring it out except in writing. Poetry is an art and like any art, should not be forced.

 

[Black Phoenix]

When I do my writing, I typically write about what I'm feeling at the moment. This is usually when I'm feeling some strong emotions and don't really know how to bring it out except in writing. Poetry is an art and like any art, should not be forced.

My uni course would beg to differ. One of the many issues I have with it, actually.

I've never been good with poetry myself, but when I had to do it for this degree course (one of the assessments for that module was a portfolio of poetry), I took a title or random subject, and just ran with it It's probably the nearest I've ever got to free writing. So I had things like Summer, Winter, and even one on the fact that I was really struggling to write said poetry.

I have to say though, those poems weren't all that good. But then again, as I said, I'm no poet, I'm much more of a prose writer. It might work better for you. Just a suggestion anyway.

 

[SilentCom]

I'm not going to give a topic suggestion but I find that writing about something people can relate to and understand on an emotion level tends to make for a better reading. Isn't that why poetry is created anyways? I consider poetry as word art.

 

[Hero in a half shell]

As has been said, what you have written is actually really good technically. You used poetic devices, like alliteration, and all that jazz, it may just be me but I thought you could do with more of these and especially more actual rhyming words, (I know modern poetry isn't big on rhyme but I think that's why most of it is crap)

The problem is (If you'll forgive me being crude) that you've written a whole lot about nothing. Poetry works best when it is used to give a message. There needs to be a deeper meaning in order to connect to the reader. It needs to be interpretable into a higher purpose, look at Poe's The Raven. Its about a guy getting freaked out by a bird flying through the window, but its actually about the human fear of death and oblivion, or the futility of love, or the guilt of missed opportunities, or a million other things, because Poe added other interpretable elements into the poem, his lost love, the futility of his attempts to get the bird to leave, the quote "nevermore" . All these surreal elements allow the reader to interpret the poem, it stops it from being just narrative and gives it a higher, philosophical meaning.

I think I must say again that I did like your poem, but you need to work on your subjects, as was the point of the post. Think about philosophical issues that concern you. Are you feeling particuarly existential? then find a way of putting that into poetic form, a gardener pulling weeds. only to have more constantly grow back. Are you frustrated with the stupidity of people around you? think of a real world situation that can be turned into a poetic metaphor. Best of luck.