Poll: Can you defeat yourself

[DoPo]

The "Can you defend yourself" thread has almost 10 pages of discussion so far but I doubt any of it covers what I'm interested in (haven't checked, though): can you defeat yourself?

There is the scenario:
You go about your business when a figure jumps out of a dark alley[footnote]no dark alleys around where you live? Well, TOUGH LUCK, you don't get to avoid the scenario - the dark figure jumps from a roof, or crawls out of the sewers, or failing that, it arrives riding a bear, jumps off and the bear speeds off into the distance[/footnote] and tries to mug you. Upon closer inspection, that figure is you. You pause to think how is this possible - time travel? Alternative dimension? Aliens? You take another good look of yourself (that is in front) and notice you (he? she? ...it?) wears the same clothes and otherwise both of you look quite similar. As far as you can tell, they also act the same way (body language, posture, etc). Although, the other you seems to have more of a beard (yes, even if you're a girl!).

As you pause to process this again, you (the other one) says "Come on, give me the money, or things will get messy!". You notices the guy girl person? yourself isn't armed. Unless you normally carry a weapon, in which case, yourself has that weapon but hasn't drawn it yet. Yourself looks a bit nervous and frequently throws a glance around. "Give. Me. The. Money!" yourself utters one more time with low but stern tone. And just as you are settling with how to think of you and yourself, yourself jumps at you.

They have to cross a bit of space, though, so you have time for one final thought - "Can I defeat myself?"

Well? Feel free to elaborate how things will go down.

 

[Ruedyn]

Well, I think I'm an even match for myself, we're both decent fencers, and we've been in enough schoolyard fights to know we're good at combat. Neither of us has good endurance though, so if I could make it a trial of attrition I have a pretty good chance. I'm a terrible shot, so a gun would do more harm to him than me. Still, we're both good at psychological warfare, and he could goad me into fucking up...

I just have to trust my girlfriend to shoot the one that isn't the me that I am ._.

 

[C F]

Crack knuckles. Flex fingers. Begin typi- oh wait.

I can't defend against strikes nearly as aggressive as the kind I'll try to dish out. It's all on who gets the hit. And despite the fact I'm rushing at me, I'm confident stationary me can get in a nasty blow on my inevitably wide-open moving self. Sorry Beard-me, but that money is mine!

Oh, you think the beard makes you tougher? Well it's only slowing you down!
You! Should! Have! Shaved!
*clobber*
Booyeah.

 

[Shadowstar38]

In order to get my wallet, they'd have to be the aggressor. Due to my combat being reliant on countering, double me isn't going to have much luck.

 

[tippy2k2]

Now now, perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything...

I have no clue if I could take myself. I'd like to think I could hold my own in a fight but I am not trained in anything. However, I am more than willing to fight dirty if I think someone is out to hurt me. So I guess it depends on who gets the crotch shot in first would determine the victor...

 

[dyre]

If it was just a dark alley, I'd have to say we'd be pretty evenly matched. I do carry a quality, metal pen around all the time though, so I guess I'm slightly better armed than myself.

But since there aren't that many dark alleys here, I'll assume I invaded my home riding a bear. In which case I've got a Kimber 1911 waiting for both myself and my bear!

 

[Heronblade]

I've got a pretty full beard already. In order to distinguish himself, my double must have a rather impressive handhold on his face. Advantage me!

Beyond that, the outcome could hardly be in more doubt. I'm physically adept enough to keep moving, but have got zilch in practical combat training. I have also never lifted a fist in anger, much less gotten in a fight, not because I'm a pacifist by any reasonable definition of the term, but because I don't let minor issues get to me and simply have not been in a more serious confrontation.

 

[Kae]

If he is me he kinda sucks at fighting, I would most definitely stand my ground but I reckon we probably would end up knocking each other out with a simultaneous headbutt.

 

[Hazy992]

I'd grab hold of his my beard and just keep punching him me in the face. I'm gonna kick my ass!

 

[StormShaun]

I wouldn't want to hurt me cause I will only hurt myself in the....WHAT.

Okay, I think him and me would come to an agreement that we don't like fighting...unless he was the evil me, then I would have to use my light powers to defeat his dark powers!

But what happens if its the opposite!?

F***...I would like to make peace unless you are evil...then we can fight. Evil Vs Good! [sub]...then I would win.[/sub]

 

[Lionsfan]

So is this going to turn into the new "Drowning" thread?

 

[DugMachine]

We'll both go out in a glory of synchronized punches and kicks.

 

[DoPo]

Well, so far the poll shows we have one pacifist and one confused person both getting punched in the face. The rest seem to be eager to fight, and close to half of them are Daystar Clarion (or ninjas, or wizards).

If it was just a dark alley, I'd have to say we'd be pretty evenly matched. I do carry a quality, metal pen around all the time though, so I guess I'm slightly better armed than myself.

But since there aren't that many dark alleys here, I'll assume I invaded my home riding a bear. In which case I've got a Kimber 1911 waiting for both myself and my bear!

Well, if you carry a pen, he'll also carry a pen. But if I had to guess, don't think you will bring a pistol to your house when you go to mug yourself there. On the other hand, you might know you have a pistol in your house. Just something to note .

I thus sacrifice a goat to the RNG gods (does he do the same?)

I dunno, do you normally carry a goat around? If so, then maybe, otherwise, probably not.

 

[Euryalus]

In order to get my wallet, they'd have to be the aggressor. Due to my combat being reliant on countering, double me isn't going to have much luck.

This sounds about right for me as well.

OT: Plus my double should know not to piss me off. I tend to have a very very short temper that gets set off when people get physical towards me. Also I don't carry more than 20 bucks with me very often. The other me should know this...

 

[dyre]

If it was just a dark alley, I'd have to say we'd be pretty evenly matched. I do carry a quality, metal pen around all the time though, so I guess I'm slightly better armed than myself.

But since there aren't that many dark alleys here, I'll assume I invaded my home riding a bear. In which case I've got a Kimber 1911 waiting for both myself and my bear!

Well, if you carry a pen, he'll also carry a pen. But if I had to guess, don't think you will bring a pistol to your house when you go to mug yourself there. On the other hand, you might know you have a pistol in your house. Just something to note .

Oh, well, if I come riding in with my pistol holstered on my person (or my bear), while my own pistol is locked in my desk, I guess I've lost this battle for sure

 

[Luftwaffles]

If you managed to rape yourself, what does that count as?

Or alternatively i'll just make me give me my wallet.

 

[CrimsonBlaze]

Even though that I would be evenly matched with myself (physically, intellectually, and psychologically), I know that I can defeat myself because I already know what to do in case that scenario were to occur.

 

[White Lightning]

Screw that noise, I'd get myself to help me mug some poor sap. It's the perfect plan!