Poll: Death to the panda!

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Quaxar

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Sep 21, 2009
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So anyway, just having had a short discussion about the topic, I am interested in other opinions.

Personally, I don't give a fuck about the panda and I believe it is an evolutionary dead-end already that shouldn't be treated specially just because it has a cute fur pattern.

Pandas only have few heat days per year if they can be arsed to shag anyway and their offspring per birth rate is small (one per two years). Not to mention that in captivity they mostly lose their sex drive completely which in the past meant expensive artificial insemination or crazy experiments (panda porn!) and only recently they have managed to encourage breeding with cheaper methods.
Then there's the fact that they are carnivorous in principle but are too lazy to actually eat meat so they have to spend the whole day chewing bamboo to even meet their nutrition requirements.
Not to forget that they are expensive to hold in most countries and, even worse, since the 80s China has gone from gifting pandas to loaning them at a rate of up to 1 million dollars per year under the condition that every born cub automatically is property of China.

And finally, the fact that the panda is a completely unessential part of its environment while a great number of endangered EDGE species are vital parts of theirs but don't receive much attention because apparently panda fur is the boob bonus of the animal kingdom.

So my point is let's just get rid of the panda and actually save a species worth it. Your move.
 

PsychicTaco115

I've Been Having These Weird Dreams Lately...
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Mar 17, 2012
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What if I want to sex up the panda?

You know, make a human cross-breed...

It could happen! >.>
 

Ruedyn

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Jun 29, 2011
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Agreement, pretty much. If the panda wishes to not have sex, is doesn't need to, and should suffer cause and effect.

Also pretty sure this would only be the only species to go extinct because it just couldn't be arsed. I want that in the history books.
 
Apr 24, 2008
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How do you know to attribute anything to laziness? Aren't you just anthropomorphising where it isn't appropriate?

Wild panda numbers do actually increase when their areas are put under protection. They don't seem to like being poached and seem to be adapted to having a lot of space.

I think it's an accepted truth that large animals need a lot of territory, and by protecting the Panda's territory you inadvertently(actually purposely, if you're willing to accept that Panda's are a very good marketing tool for the conservationalists) protect lots of other species as well.

I won't pretend to have anything pegged, but I really don't think it's so cut & dry. I think it's pretty arrogant to claim that the problem is that they won't fuck when and where we want them to, rather than that our species has a nasty habit of destroying habitats. It feels a lot like responsibility dodging.
 

Arakasi

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Jun 14, 2011
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Neither of those two options?
I want them to keep living incase they somehow become useful to us in some way we don't know yet (or their meat is delicious) but I certainly wouldn't give up much to see them go on living.
 

Glasgow

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Oct 17, 2011
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There are a lot of other animals I don't get to see in the zoo that I care more about than pandas. Option 1 for me.
 

scorptatious

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May 14, 2009
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Sexual Harassment Panda said:
How do you know to attribute anything to laziness? Aren't you just anthropomorphising where it isn't appropriate?

Wild panda numbers do actually increase when their areas are put under protection. They don't seem to like being poached and seem to be adapted to having a lot of space.

I think it's an accepted truth that large animals need a lot of territory, and by protecting the Panda's territory you inadvertently(actually purposely, if you're willing to accept that Panda's are a very good marketing tool for the conservationalists) protect lots of other species as well.

I won't pretend to have anything pegged, but I really don't think it's so cut & dry. I think it's pretty arrogant to claim that the problem is that they won't fuck when and where we want them to, rather than that our species has a nasty habit of destroying habitats. It feels a lot like responsibility dodging.
Clearly you are an unbiased source of information Mr. Panda. :p

OT: Eh, I don't care. As cute as pandas are, I won't go so far as to give up any theoretical children just to ensure the species's survival.
 

mysecondlife

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Feb 24, 2011
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I ran into couple of articles on panda feces and how it could be used to brew cancer fighting tea (eww) and how its microbes could be used to make biofuels.

So they stay.
 

DanielBrown

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Dec 3, 2010
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Yeah, I agree, and have said this myself for a few years. Let them fend for their own survival. If they manage we still get our cute pandas. If they don't... whatever.
Watched a documentary a few months ago about a panda breeding facility in China. The females seemed desperate for it, when in heat, but the males either wasn't the least bit intrested or didn't even know how to fuck.
 

MiskWisk

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Mar 17, 2012
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While I do agree that the Panda is an evolutionary dead end that requires a perfectly stable environment that will never change, I'm still going to vote to save them. Why? Because thanks to them, I got an A on my biology coursework at AS level and an A in general studies (although I would have preferred an A in maths).
 

MeChaNiZ3D

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Aug 30, 2011
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I don't know, the whole conservation issue is a bit of a quandry. Some species should be saved because human activity is the reason they're indisposed in the first place, but some are just shitty at surviving and aren't any good. But the two categories are practically indistinguishable a lot of the time because human activity has changed so many things. I think yes, keep them around because they're fucking adorable and there's no good reason to be saving any number of other doomed species, so at the end of the day, because they're cute is as good a reason as any.
 

lechat

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Dec 5, 2012
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nah serious fuck the panda. if it can't be bothered to whet it's whistle on some panda poon then it deserves to die

other solution obviously is to cross breed pandas with rabbits so we can increase the population
 

keiji_Maeda

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May 9, 2012
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Friendly Lich said:
Sadly they are kind of useless and poorly adapt. Also very energy inefficient when it comes to food.
Might catch flack for this. But your average First worlder ain't that energy efficient either, and yet i am banned from hunting them. Even the lazy ones.
 

keiji_Maeda

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May 9, 2012
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Sexual Harassment Panda said:
How do you know to attribute anything to laziness? Aren't you just anthropomorphising where it isn't appropriate?

Wild panda numbers do actually increase when their areas are put under protection. They don't seem to like being poached and seem to be adapted to having a lot of space.

I think it's an accepted truth that large animals need a lot of territory, and by protecting the Panda's territory you inadvertently(actually purposely, if you're willing to accept that Panda's are a very good marketing tool for the conservationalists) protect lots of other species as well.

I won't pretend to have anything pegged, but I really don't think it's so cut & dry. I think it's pretty arrogant to claim that the problem is that they won't fuck when and where we want them to, rather than that our species has a nasty habit of destroying habitats. It feels a lot like responsibility dodging.
"Never Say no to panda"

A large part of the pandas habitat issues strem from being hunted by humans. Let's pick up our own mess.
 

A.A.K

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Mar 7, 2009
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I don't think any animal should go extinct.
I like difference and all that.

...and Panda's are awesome.

Anybody who allows their indifference and apathy be the death of an entire species, is a sad - and in my opinion, a pathetic person.