Poll: Does she like me?

[vento 231]

Let me apologize in advance for making one of "those" threads, but I need a little help.

Hi, I meet a rather pretty girl about a month ago at a high school football game. I talked to her for about 30 minutes. She was friendly at first, but as the conversation went on, she became more closed off. I'm pretty good at reading body language, and she was just not into me, toward the end of the conversation, she was sitting in the corner with her legs crossed, texting and seemingly annoyed, even my wingman noticed. I offered her my jacket because she seemed cold, and she declined. That is fine, plenty of fish in the sea or other cliche. I left her alone and sat with my wingman and watched the game. I pass her in school regularly and for the next week I smiled at her and got a breif smile back, at first it kind of seemed forced. I stopped and focused on other girls for about a month. Now, based on 100% of my experience, on both sides of dating (chasing/being chased), you cannot change a persons opinion if they aren't attracted to you, so this is rare for me to have second thoughts about, but after I stopped paying attention to her, she is starting to act like she is attracted to me. Today, we made eye contact and she quickly looked away, and I seem to be seeing her more often like she is trying to pass by me, though we haven't talked since the game.

If it is of any importance, we are both fifteen, she is friends with my wingman, and I recently have joined the wrestling team and become slightly more toned, and she has been single for a month now, and at the football game she had recently broke up with her ex. I am not afraid of rejection, I just don't want to bother her if she doesn't like me. Sorry for the slightly long post.
Edit: As long as it's not too much of a problem, I'm gonna make a copy of this thread in advice forum, sorry I didn't know there was one.

 

[DiMono]

If you want a girl, pretend like you don't want her. That's the general rule. Keep doing what you're doing, and make sure you flash the occasional smile her way. Say hi in the hall as you're walking past her. If she's into you, she'll come to you and start a conversation at some point. Just make sure you don't drag it out like you did the first time, because that's where you went wrong.

 

[vento 231]

If you want a girl, pretend like you don't want her. That's the general rule. Keep doing what you're doing, and make sure you flash the occasional smile her way. Say hi in the hall as you're walking past her. If she's into you, she'll come to you and start a conversation at some point. Just make sure you don't drag it out like you did the first time, because that's where you went wrong.

Thank you very much, I figured something went wrong during the initial conversation, I just didn't know it was the actual conversation that went wrong. It's kinda hard to get at what I'm saying, but thank you.

 

[AceAngel]

TC, your Avatar pretty much states the situation
*BA DAM TISH*

In all seriousness, ask her for a date, if she says no, oh well, nevermind. You can do other stuff.

Also, we really don't need to know you're toned...15 year old kids with toned bodies...bah, back in my days, we didn't need to be toned.

 

[aPod]

Well she could have just been a bad mood that night and didn't want to talk period. Sometimes people are cold like that. Maybe she really wasn't into you but because you showed interest in her she's warming up to that fact contrary to what you believe when you said "you cannot change a persons opinion if they aren't attracted to you" but i'll chalk that up to you still being young.

Also use paragraphs, it's hard going back and citing text.

Another thing, body language is tricky, especially with women. Guys are easier to read, we are very simple, girls on the other hand often deceive with their body language. I will also warn you that sometimes people just like attention, girls and guys, and will tease/play/taunt with you to get their thrills.

 

[ExaltedK9]

Ugh, I hate girls who only show interest when they're being ignored. So many pointless mindgames these days...

Anyways, the OT, just take it slow, and give her a bit more space til she comes around.

 

[Nouw]

Try the advice forum. Anyway, I don't think so.

P.S. Use Paragraphs!

 

[vento 231]

TC, your Avatar pretty much states the situation
*BA DAM TISH*

In all seriousness, ask her for a date, if she says no, oh well, nevermind. You can do other stuff.

Also, we really don't need to know you're toned...15 year old kids with toned bodies...bah, back in my days, we didn't need to be toned.

Sorry for too much info. I'm alittle proud and kinda thought it might be significant since this change of attitude came after I started working out.

 

[Mr. Google]

In the halls smack her ass if she moan seductivley then...well idk what the hell u figured out but you have to be getting some where right?
In all honesty she might. strike up a convo on facebook then maybe ask for her number. Idk thats how it usually works for me as a 15 year old

 

[SimuLord]

In ascending order of danger:

Glowing One ---> Nuclear Anomaly ---> RAK in a relationship thread.

Also:
- She's not interested.
- You're 15, for fucksakes.
- If you're not suave enough to close the deal, you should BE the wingman.

 

[WingedIncubus]

Let me apologize in advance for making one of "those" threads, but I need a little help.

Hi, I meet a rather pretty girl about a month ago at a high school football game. I talked to her for about 30 minutes. She was friendly at first, but as the conversation went on, she became more closed off. I'm pretty good at reading body language, and she was just not into me, toward the end of the conversation, she was sitting in the corner with her legs crossed, texting and seemingly annoyed, even my wingman noticed. I offered her my jacket because she seemed cold, and she declined. That is fine, plenty of fish in the sea or other cliche. I left her alone and sat with my wingman and watched the game. I pass her in school regularly and for the next week I smiled at her and got a breif smile back, at first it kind of seemed forced. I stopped and focused on other girls for about a month.

Good, forget about her totally and get ten other girls.

Worst thing you can do is pine for her, it's needy. In fact, just plain ignore her unless she comes to you and enact conversation. She is not part of your life, so she has to work for your attention.

She closed off to you, she didn't give you any physical or verbal cue of attraction, and despite you persevering she didn't open herself up. Bottom line, she rejected you, move on, end of story.

Now, based on 100% of my experience, on both sides of dating (chasing/being chased), you cannot change a persons opinion if they aren't attracted to you, so this is rare for me to have second thoughts about, but after I stopped paying attention to her, she is starting to act like she is attracted to me. Today, we made eye contact and she quickly looked away, and I seem to be seeing her more often like she is trying to pass by me, though we haven't talked since the game.

False. Attraction is influenced by a gazillion of factors, most of these out of your control. Thus, her opinion of you might be totally IF if you disappear out of her sight and suddenly come back in such a way that she perceives you differently from the first time, even if you didn't change anything. Also, unless she absolutely loathes your mere sight, if she sees other women being attracted and coming over you, chances are she might change her mind because other girls are pre-selecting you as a viable mate.

If it is of any importance, we are both fifteen, she is friends with my wingman, and I recently have joined the wrestling team and become slightly more toned, and she has been single for a month now, and at the football game she had recently broke up with her ex. I am not afraid of rejection, I just don't want to bother her if she doesn't like me. Sorry for the slightly long post.

Don't bother, don't pine for her, don't chase. Plenty of fishes in the sea, man. Rejecting you is a good thing, it saves your time and energy for girls who will pine for you. It's her loss, not yours.

Also, don't focus on your good looks, they won't seduce women on their own that weren't attracted to you in the first place. Good looks give you only a first interview, you still have to work to won her over.

 

[Odbarc]

I've done the "pretend you aren't interested" all my life. It never works.
Try honesty; "I'm not sure how things would go, but would you like to see a movie/get dinner/hang out sometime?"
Throw in some generation slang like "you seem um cool and stuff".

 

[theironbat46]

Just go for it, but casually. Don't seem like you really love her, just a little in interested. It will be fine, even if she says no things will be back to normal a month or 2.

 

[WingedIncubus]

I've done the "pretend you aren't interested" all my life. It never works.
Try honesty; "I'm not sure how things would go, but would you like to see a movie/get dinner/hang out sometime?"
Throw in some generation slang like "you seem um cool and stuff".

People don't get the intent behind "pretend you are not interested", they think it means ignoring the person from the start and acting like a jerkass. Of course it doesn't work, ignoring a person is a punishment, not a social cue. And if she doesn't see you as a potential mate from the start, it does nothing. Women don't respond to being ignored by schlobs and the run-of-the-mill guy, they respond to being ignored in a social context by leaders, alpha men, and bad boys who demonstrate higher value. In other words, "social proofed" men already pre-selected by other women as a sexual threat.

What most people don't get is that it means, in fact, "do not verbalize you are interested", like saying "I like you" or "I'm in love in you" to her, as it puts her between a rock and a hard place even if she is attracted and it surrenders the guy's power of selection to her.

What's preferable is to act coolly, with confidence, without a shred of neediness or dependence to the outcome (hence acting like you are not interested), BUT signal interest to her non-verbally, ex. by entering her space, touching her more and/or in more intimate parts of her body, busting her balls, sexualizing the conversation, etc.

Women are not fools, they know that when 99.9% of male strangers approach them out of nowhere and strike a conversation, it's because they are attracted to them.