I was just curious, as it does say "banned for this post", and if you're using these things as a guideline for what is considered bannable behavior, confusion ensues. More than my regular degree of confusion, even.Skatologist said:
Poll: If you die, do you want your Sig Other to find someone else?
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I told them a long time ago that if I go first, explicitly they should feel okay with it.
I mean, I don't want them to jump into any relationship because I'm gone, but if they find someone....
I mean, I don't want them to jump into any relationship because I'm gone, but if they find someone....
Love may not be diminished or divided, but I think it means something more to some people to be the most important to someone. To be the person their SO cares about the most.Skatologist said:Funny as always Guppy. Anyways, I can tell you for what reason Mars was banned and it doesn't have to do with the post(we've been messaging each other for about 2 hours to get to the bottom of this), but I'd prefer it be through PMs than discussing here as to derail the whole thread.BloatedGuppy said:
On Topic: Completely agree with Mars (except with having the SO part ;_
Suppose I could also say that even if I were alive, I wouldn't think I'd mind too much if my SO had more than one of their own. I haven't yet red it, but The Ethical Slut criticizes the idea that love for a SO/sexual partner/life partner is divided or otherwise diminished by having more than one of them. That argument being called a "starvation economy" and the writers of the book make the counterpoint to the idea by addressing the fact that love isn't lessened for a child by their parents if they are a single child or if they had many siblings, therefore love isn't diminished when having to "share it" with more than one partner. Just thought was interesting.
I would want my significant other to dedicate their life to bringing me back from the dead. They know damn well I want immortality.
Nah I'm kidding. I think it's less about the dead one wanting their partner to move on, and more about the widow/er being unable to.
Nah I'm kidding. I think it's less about the dead one wanting their partner to move on, and more about the widow/er being unable to.
Absolutely not. She should be spending all of her time hunting down a copy of the Necronomicon, so that I can be resurrected.
That or put my brain into some large robot body. I'm not picky.
That or put my brain into some large robot body. I'm not picky.
No. Why? Because I don't have a significant other and probably won't when I eventually die. Hence I won't have anyone even trying to hold onto me in the first place.
So see, I'm being considerate in remaining single. Oh, the sacrifices I make!
But more seriously, in the hypothetical situation that I die while dating or married, I would just leave that up to her. Different people handle grief and loss differently. Some people can move on easily while others aren't comfortable with getting into a serious relationship with anyone else. I don't know what my hypothetical future girlfriend or wife would be like or how she'd handle the death of loved ones, so I really could say is that I'd want her to at least be happy with whatever situation she finds herself in. Whether that finding comfort in someone else or in memories of our time together wouldn't really matter to me.
So yeah, absolutely no idea what caused it. At the very least, the post definitely doesn't seem to be worthy of a ban or even a warning.
So see, I'm being considerate in remaining single. Oh, the sacrifices I make!
But more seriously, in the hypothetical situation that I die while dating or married, I would just leave that up to her. Different people handle grief and loss differently. Some people can move on easily while others aren't comfortable with getting into a serious relationship with anyone else. I don't know what my hypothetical future girlfriend or wife would be like or how she'd handle the death of loved ones, so I really could say is that I'd want her to at least be happy with whatever situation she finds herself in. Whether that finding comfort in someone else or in memories of our time together wouldn't really matter to me.
Well, I've certainly seen "banned for this post" come up on the last post a person makes before requesting a ban, temporary or permanent. But generally those people request it in the post itself, which isn't the case here, and Skatologist seems to have dismissed that it happened elsewhere. I've also seen it occur when someone got caught using a user group of PM to break rules, but that time it was accompanied by a note from the mod that banned the person.BloatedGuppy said:
So yeah, absolutely no idea what caused it. At the very least, the post definitely doesn't seem to be worthy of a ban or even a warning.
No. When I pass away, I want my PC and PS3 to be cremated beside me. The three of us have already worked out an understanding.
Post-mortem why would I care? I don't own my wife so she can do whatever she feels is right for her. If I'm the first to go I hope only that she finds a way to be happy, and wouldn't begrudge her if she met another person. On the off-chance there's still some awareness left after death, all I could ask for is that it isn't like a 2 days later she's with someone thing... it'd be kinda fucked up and I'd think there was something going on before I died.
But I still can't argue, cuz I'm dead.
But I still can't argue, cuz I'm dead.
Fuck yeah, they should... except if they're me because they know that can't do any better at that point... 
But seriously, I hope they do... as long as they don't shit-talk behind my dead back... especially the lying kind of shit-talking...
But seriously, I hope they do... as long as they don't shit-talk behind my dead back... especially the lying kind of shit-talking...
Haven't really thought about it... My significant other found someone else, so now I kinda want to die though... does that count as an answer?
Isn't it? Almost everyone I know who has siblings is aware of there being a "favourite child", who gets more resources, support and attention than the others, so that doesn't strike me as the best comparison.Skatologist said:
Absolutely. She is already emotionally dependent on me to a point that has me very concerned. I don't want to contemplate the idea of her staring at a wall after I'm gone to the point where she wastes away. Odds are good that I will go first. The men in my family tend not to live long lives for various reasons.
I feel my wife should do what makes her happy, regardless if that involves staying single for the rest of her life or getting married just after my funeral(though that make be awkward for a few people, having a wedding in a cemetary).
Happyninja42 said:
You rang?BloatedGuppy said:
Mods can't discuss people's ban reasons but I can tell you both it wasn't for the post. I've edited in a note now but that's as much as I can say.
My wife and I are poly so obviously yes. We also have 3 kids together so raising them on her own would be an incredible task.
No, I demand that she spends the rest of her life in her funeral garb, standing on a cliff, staring out to sea. Regardless of whether I die at sea. Or the fact that Indian funeral garbs are white, not black, so it kinda ruins the image.
Nah, she can do whatever she likes.
Nah, she can do whatever she likes.
Thank you, as it was very confusing, given what the ban notice said was the reason, compared to what he said. It was a fairly on point comment to the subject, which is what flummoxed me. I was mostly asking "what about this post was banworthy?" as I couldn't see why. But since it's not due to that, no issue.sky14kemea said: