Poll: Justin Bieber has cancer!

likalaruku

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Nov 29, 2008
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I've never heard a single song of his, but most of my friends think he is a physical manifestation of cancer.

I want to see pictures of the outcome. I've heard of "blind faith" but I'd like to see some "bald faith."
 

karloss01

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Jul 5, 2009
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did anyone actually follow the support site link and the bottom of the op's post?
it is fake...

unfortunately :D
 

thedoclc

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Jun 24, 2008
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Not sure if this has been brought up in the last five pages, but that is a liver function test and a profile. For diagnosing any form of leukemia, it's not relevant. The only two pieces of data that aren't normal in that mess are triglycerides and low high density lipoproteins. Basically, the patient that came from has higher than normal fat in their blood and low good cholesterol. That describes pretty much everyone in America.

If you sent a blood sample to the lab for that report, all you'd get back is the data from the lab. The lab doing a liver function test would not report back on suspected or confirmed leukemia because that's not the test they've been asked to run. If I send a lab a request to give me (insert lab here) test, they send back what they're asked for and no more.

Also, a physician does not diagnose "leukemia." There are a laundry list of different kinds of leukemia, such as Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia, Chronic Myeloid Leukemia, and Hairy Cell (yes) Leukemia. You would ideally want a description of a biopsy and a complete blood count (tells you what cells and how many are in the blood). You wouldn't casually append it to a list of liver tests with no details.

I'd also add that "Leukemia POS" is in a different font with all the footnotes at the bottom referring to the tests described above. No leukemia is abbreviated POS that I know of: it's usually AML, ALL, CML, CLL, and a few oddball types, but none of them are labeled POS. I'd go with POS standing for "Piece of Shit."

TL;DR: It's almost certainly a very clumsy fake.
 

Thedutchjelle

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Mar 31, 2009
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Yureina said:
Normally I enjoy a good trolling, but...I don't find this very funny. Probably because I don't think cancer is something to joke about.
This. AS much as Bieber sucks, there is still a line that we shouldn't cross.
 

Setrus

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Oct 17, 2011
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Where's a picture of Al Gore in South Park being "super cereal"...?

Really, not buying it, nor caring.
 

BarbaricGoose

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May 25, 2010
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Huh. I may have that too. Small world.

I don't like Justin Bieber's music, but I don't want him to die. I just don't wanna hear "Baby" everywhere I go. That's fucked up. No one should have to go through cancer, let alone a kid.
 

Assassin Xaero

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Jul 23, 2008
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1. I'm calling bullshit on this.
2. If he does, that sucks, but no, I won't shave my head to support a guy I don't like. I think the only person I would do that for would be a good friend or family member, and even then, my hair is already pretty short, so it wouldn't be much of a difference.
 

Redlin5_v1legacy

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Aug 5, 2009
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Yureina said:
Normally I enjoy a good trolling, but...I don't find this very funny. Probably because I don't think cancer is something to joke about.
When almost every family has had a brush with cancer killing another family member, the joke really kind of shrivels up and dies.

So yeah...
 

kickyourass

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Apr 17, 2010
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If it's true then I genuinely feel sorry for him, yeah I think he's basically devoid of talent but that doesn't mean he should get cancer.

If it's fake however (Which seems a bit more likely) the guy doing this is kind of a douche bag, not cool guy.
 

gbemery

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Jun 27, 2009
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yes because the idea of someone suffering through cancer treatments and the ever real possibility of dieing is soooo funny. I don't like him but joking about someone having a serious illness is basically the definition of being an ass. My girlfriend is fighting leukemia. What is so hilarious about that? What is so hilarious about seeing her fight for her life hoping one day her blood counts will be normal? What is so funny about her wondering if she should even bother with college because she doesn't know if she will even be alive to graduate? Whats so funny about seeing the pain in her eyes of wondering if the treatments will even work or sadness when she just wants to go outside but every movement is painful from the chemo and drains all her energy and makes her feel horrible? Whats so funny about the times when she wonders if it would just be better to give up? The answer is not a damn thing is funny about it and if you find it funny then I hope you never have to go through it or see someone you love go through it.
 

Ieyke

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Jul 24, 2008
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SmashLovesTitanQuest said:
Very elaborate troll. I wonder which jackass thought it would be funny to troll some 13 year old girl into shaving her head. 10/10.

I mean seriously. I don't approve but THIS is trolling guys. Not just acting like a retard on the internet, this is some oldschool shit right here.

I'm not calling the OP a troll, I suspect someone else thought this up. And it does seem like an troll. Call me crazy but I'm not buying it.
True or not, to me this is just funny.
Yes yes, to people irrelevant to me I can be a heartless monster, blah blah blah.


But I agree, this reeks of classically trained trolling, or the concentrated machinations of 4chan.
 

major28

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Feb 25, 2010
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Looks at appointment card to get his head shaved that I've had for a week...

If one person asks if this is because of justin bieber I vow to end the world in a fiery holocaust
 

Dascylus

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May 22, 2010
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major28 said:
Looks at appointment card to get his head shaved that I've had for a week...

If one person asks if this is because of justin bieber I vow to end the world in a fiery holocaust
Why do you need an appointment to shave your head? If it's not for some personal sensitive reason that you don't need to talk about that is.
 

CarlMin

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Jun 6, 2010
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If this is true then I do of course feel sorry for him and hope that his cancer is not of the more aggressive kind.

If it isn't, and it doesn't seem like it is, what on earth is even the point of such a prank to begin with? Is it supposed to be clever? I can't even see how it could possibly be viewed as funny. Now, this is what's the problem with our this generation. It relies on either the glorification or the demonetization of pop-culture media personalities and idols. Our society isn't healthy.
 

major28

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Feb 25, 2010
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CarlMinez said:
If this is true then I do of course feel sorry for him and hope that his cancer is not of the more aggressive kind.

If it isn't, and it doesn't seem like it is, what on earth is even the point of such a prank to begin with? Is it supposed to be clever? I can't even see how it could possibly be viewed as funny. Now, this is what's the problem with our this generation. It relies on either the glorification or the demonetization of pop-culture media personalities and idols. Our society isn't healthy.
No, you just have to schedule ahead of time with my barber.