Poll: Most interesting emotion: Fear vs love

[MelasZepheos_v1legacy]

I think the problem with saying love isn't interesting is that most people who say that have never actually been in love. I've been afraid, and I've been in love, and love is infinitely more interesting.

Fear is simple 'I am afraid of this thing' Anything more complex is 'why am I afraid of it?' and usually the answer is simple then. 'It causes pain, it makes me emotional, I'm woried it will make me emotional.'

Love is so much more. Knowing why you do or don't love something can be a real mystery. Until I met my most recent girlfriend, I would never have said that I like girls like her, but somehow I am falling in love with her, and I have no idea why. I know why I'm afraid of wasps, or the dark, but I don't know why I'm in love with her.

Simple as.

 

[violinist1129]

Most psychological fears have been fairly accurately diagnosed and predicted by psychologists. Hell, neuroscientists can open your brain and make you feel that deep seated fear at any time. They can't make you love. They can make you temporarily happy, but they can't make you love.

 

[Doclector]

Fear is simple, easy to define and understand. Love is the opposite.

Love wins

Oh, on the contrary. Nothing is more complex than the workings of true fear. Pulling the strings, pushing someone's personal emotional panic buttons, it's fascinating.

And another thing. You can escape love. You can teach yourself not to feel it, you can be traumatised out of feeling it, Some claim never to have felt it in the first place. Not quite sure on that, but still...You can face your fears a hundred times, you may be the bravest person in the world, but fear will always come back.

Actually people face their fears all the time and win. There is a theraputic process for people that cant do it on their own. There is a friggin TV show about it. It isnt easy but neither is love. What would courage mean if you cant overcome fear. How did you ever overcome your fear of the dark/monster in the closet/under the bed?

Courage isn't not being afraid. It's being afraid and not letting it beat you. Do you think people who go on that show are really no longer afraid? Of anything? No, they just learned to cope with it.

And the dark? The monsters in the closet? No one ever stops being afraid of that. Can you really say honestly you've never laid awake and gotten paranoid about it? Maybe it ain't the boogeyman anymore, but you can't help but think of something being there. A burglar. A murderer. Maybe just someone, something that you don't want to see again.

 

[weker]

You're thinking of the wrong kind of fear. I'm afraid of spiders in that way. It has no real bearing on anything, they just creep me out. Now, why I'm afraid of crowds, the fears that have a psychological reason that is more often than not different for everyone, that is the interesting fears. That's true fear.

You used a comparison and explained one, and then used another comparison claiming it was different without explaining it.
Most people are scared of crowds as they
dislike being with large groups of people
think everyone is looking/judging them
unsettled by strangers, and a crowd is a mass of them
and so on

With spiders
They cocoon their food
has long legs
alien to you
some people are scared they could be toxic or have poison

both have some form of psychological cause for fear, but fear is still caused due to instincts, the only difference is fear has spread to not just animals and danger, but also uncertainty.

With love on the other hand, is very different, due to things like "loving a child" or "loving someone who isn't attractive"
For instance if I like a girl she could be my friend, if I like her even more I would try to go further with her even if I don't find her physically attractive or intelligent.
For a guy however no matter how good looking he was or his personality, we could still only just be friends.

Also there is things to consider like "loving" your child, this has removed love as a "sexual emotion", as long as children aren't your cup of tea

 

[Doclector]

You're thinking of the wrong kind of fear. I'm afraid of spiders in that way. It has no real bearing on anything, they just creep me out. Now, why I'm afraid of crowds, the fears that have a psychological reason that is more often than not different for everyone, that is the interesting fears. That's true fear.

You used a comparison and explained one, and then used another comparison claiming it was different without explaining it.
Most people are scared of crowds as they
dislike being with large groups of people
think everyone is looking/judging them
unsettled by strangers, and a crowd is a mass of them
and so on

Ah...but that's not why I'm afraid of crowds. There may be a common reason, but even that's just a guess. And why is that person unsettled by strangers? Why do they think people are judging them?

 

[weker]

Courage isn't not being afraid. It's being afraid and not letting it beat you. Do you think people who go on that show are really no longer afraid? Of anything? No, they just learned to cope with it.

And the dark? The monsters in the closet? No one ever stops being afraid of that. Can you really say honestly you've never laid awake and gotten paranoid about it? Maybe it ain't the boogeyman anymore, but you can't help but think of something being there. A burglar. A murderer. Maybe just someone, something that you don't want to see again.

I can with ease, as I am no longer afraid of boogeymen, heights, dogs, cats (I just hate the gits now due to how they work), needles, and fear of speaking to people and strangers.
I am in no way afraid of any of these, and some of which I confronted some I grew out of.

It sounds like you don't comprehend love's complexity as you sound like a person who is very involved with fear, and is letting that cloud your judgment. I don't mean this as any form of offense, just an analysis from what you have been saying.

 

[Doclector]

Courage isn't not being afraid. It's being afraid and not letting it beat you. Do you think people who go on that show are really no longer afraid? Of anything? No, they just learned to cope with it.

And the dark? The monsters in the closet? No one ever stops being afraid of that. Can you really say honestly you've never laid awake and gotten paranoid about it? Maybe it ain't the boogeyman anymore, but you can't help but think of something being there. A burglar. A murderer. Maybe just someone, something that you don't want to see again.

I can with ease, as I am no longer afraid of boogeymen, heights, dogs, cats (I just hate the gits now due to how they work), needles, and fear of speaking to people and strangers.
I am in no way afraid of any of these, and some of which I confronted some I grew out of.

It sounds like you don't comprehend love's complexity as you sound like a person who is very involved with fear, and is letting that cloud your judgment. I don't mean this as any form of offense, just an analysis from what you have been saying.

Perhaps. Or maybe you're very involved with love, and letting that cloud your judgement. I suppose that's what makes all emotion interesting. We could debate this for millenia, and never truly would we be able to claim to "know" anything for sure.

 

[weker]

Ah...but that's not why I'm afraid of crowds. There may be a common reason, but even that's just a guess. And why is that person unsettled by strangers? Why do they think people are judging them?

I was merely naming a few, stating why your afraid of them might help, as I don't have a large list of why people are afraid of crowds, I was just naming a few I could come up with.

"And why is that person unsettled by strangers?" because they don't know them, firstly were told as a kid "stranger danger", secondly it's just logic, we don't know who they are, what their like, and what they're capable of.

The judging part is normally paranoid people, or people who don't like to be judged, as judging normally suggest in a social situations, that they're insulting them, with thoughts like "god look at her hair and how awful it is"

 

[someonehairy-ish]

Fear is interesting because individual fears say a lot about a person. Especially irrational fears.
Love may just be as potent and interesting, but for me the word has had its meaning diluted by a billion shitty songs and besides, actual love seems impossible for anyone to accurately describe or even define... so, basically it would be interesting except that anyone trying to talk about it tends to come off as ignorant or pretentious or feeble or whatever.

 

[weker]

Perhaps. Or maybe you're very involved with love, and letting that cloud your judgement. I suppose that's what makes all emotion interesting. We could debate this for millenia, and never truly would we be able to claim to "know" anything for sure.

I can assure you, I have had much more experience with fear then with love, and the gap between the two is quite severe. Many of my examples are from others and acquired knowledge more then personal experience, especially for love.

 

[quantumsoul]

I'd say both. The two can often be intermingled.

You're talking about infatuation or lust not love. Love is way different and isn't about wanting to sleep with someone until someone better comes along. I think I may have found someone I actually love and it's kind of scary.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

I'd go with fear. Love never interested me, while fear always has.

 

[kommando367]

Love. Mostly due to my immunity to fear.

 

[DarkRyter]

That feeling whenever Steve Buscemi makes eye contact with you.

 

[plugav]

I'm more interested in fear, but love is the more complex of the two. Fear is only one emotion, love is actually several - romantic love is not the same as motherly love, which is not the same as one's love for comics, etc.

 

[Daniel Allsopp]

-snip-

Neither is more interesting, in my opinion. Love makes a person, fear destroys them. Love is taken for granted, while fear is at the front of the mind all the time, though.

People who don't receive love in their lives? They're the people you see in the news, after they've tortured or killed someone.

 

[Sandernista]

However, they said that about love, but I disagree. If someone loves blondes, why would that tell me anything about them. Love is incredibly simple to me. Someone wants to sleep with someone else, if the feeling's mutual, they stay together until one of them wants to sleep with someone else, then that person will leave.

What?!

Love=/lust.

In fact fear is a part of love.

Part of the reason I love my girlfriend is because I am afraid of her, I am also afraid of being along. I love her because of her beautiful legs, and because of how, when she paints, she moves her arms like a water bender. Because she cares about me, and wants to help, but also because I need someone to care about. I love her because she always listens to me, then argues her ass off. I love her because she cares more about me than her pride, and she makes me care more about her then mine. (Not an easy task, I'm an arrogant asshole)

I could go on all day. How is this not an interesting emotion?

I said that fear was more interesting. I've always said, discover what a man is afraid of, and you discover a door into every other part of their personality.

So, what do you think? Remember, this is about what's more interesting. Not what's better, although I'd still say fear. The problems of fear are much easier and more satisfying to overcome, and the ups are far more valuable; only when we're truly scared, do we know who we truly are.

Fear is pretty boring. Fear is an instinct, love is a more evolved concept. Shit, a finch is afraid of a lot of things. Does that give you an insight into their personality? No!