I taught myself to play the guitar, which was a mistake, because I didn't know how to play it. So I was a crappy teacher.
I would never have gone to me! (Shamelessly stolen.)
All seriousness aside, I don't really "play" anything, at least not well. I have an acoustic guitar, but it's gathering dust. I've tried the drums, bass, piano, guitar, harmonica, trumpet, ocarina, and even bagpipes! I just don't have the patience to sit down and practice, I guess. I love music, but just not the... *process* of making music.