Yes, this. I always use that quote when people ask about sex before marriage.Dystopia said:
I've seen what not having sex before marriage can do to a couple when they try it out. It ain't pretty.
Poll: Pre-marital chastity - Bad idea, or not?
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I've seen what not having sex before marriage can do to a couple when they try it out. It ain't pretty.
Honestly, i totally agree with you. I'd want to know someone both physically and mentally before marrying them. (Though theres a snowball's chance in hell i'm marrying anyone.)
But i don't think chasity is a bad idea. I mean if it was so bad it wouldn't have worked so well way back when.
Its not for everyone thats for sure, and with the modern norms of society it isn't for most people. That said to those who believe in it, it works. Making it a good idea.
Ok, i think i worded that right.
But i don't think chasity is a bad idea. I mean if it was so bad it wouldn't have worked so well way back when.
Its not for everyone thats for sure, and with the modern norms of society it isn't for most people. That said to those who believe in it, it works. Making it a good idea.
Ok, i think i worded that right.
Forgive me for digressing here but... this statement intrigues me.Digi7 said:
You've said you like to sleep around which I assume is casual sex. Do you still treat sex in the way you've stated here with these partners you'll probably not have a serious relationship with?
I think people put to much on empisis recreational sex.
"You have to much sex, your an immoral person"
"You have to little sex, your a stupid/pathetic person"
I've decided to compromise with my religion and not treat sex like its the most important thing in the world, but not ignore it ether. Having a girlfriend that wants to wait isn't a deal breaker for me. I'd like it, but if gone this long with out it and don't need it
In short: Whatever.
"You have to much sex, your an immoral person"
"You have to little sex, your a stupid/pathetic person"
I've decided to compromise with my religion and not treat sex like its the most important thing in the world, but not ignore it ether. Having a girlfriend that wants to wait isn't a deal breaker for me. I'd like it, but if gone this long with out it and don't need it
In short: Whatever.
I think that it's a bad idea because I think it can make people marry for the wrong reasons. I also think that people should be comfortable with sex BEFORE they make a life long commitment but if you enforce abstaining until marriage then you sort of force yourself to marry if you want to have sex. I think that marriage should not be about sex which is why you should sort that stuff out first.
I don't see it as a bad idea, but I don't think it's great either. Everyone has their own views on sex and shouldn't force others to act their way.
Personally I think you should only have sex if you're in a loving relationship, you don't need to wait til your married but I don't like people who sleep around. Then again it's less of the fact they sleep around and more of the people who do tend to be assholes.
Personally I think you should only have sex if you're in a loving relationship, you don't need to wait til your married but I don't like people who sleep around. Then again it's less of the fact they sleep around and more of the people who do tend to be assholes.
Typically, I think that sex in general should wait until the two are in a solid, loving relationship. Marriage is just a good way of proving that you're serious about the relationship.
However, if you really love and are committed to the person, or your state's really backward, and won't let you marry because you're gay, go for it.
But these are just my personal views, I'd never try to push them on someone.
However, if you really love and are committed to the person, or your state's really backward, and won't let you marry because you're gay, go for it.
But these are just my personal views, I'd never try to push them on someone.
I don't think it's a bad idea. Some people wanna wait for a special moment, some don't, your mileage may vary from person to person.
Speaking of mileage, I'm of the personal opinion of not comparing my significant other to a car because that sounds like objectification. Just saying.
Speaking of mileage, I'm of the personal opinion of not comparing my significant other to a car because that sounds like objectification. Just saying.
Oh yes, for me it's for emotional bonding between people. Though we may never be in a relationship we do still have that affection for each other and those pleasurable experiences. It's all about socialising and loving people, but not necessarily being with them. It's an aspect of sexual maturity, I guess. Loving someone without becoming attached. Yes, it is casual, but it's tasteful casual. I make sure I've known them for a while and that we've had a lot of experiences together, as friends.game-lover said:
But I definitely see where you're coming from. I make damn sure when I AM in a relationship those feelings for others don't creep back in again.
Since you've got the experience, you probably know how it feels just simply enjoying the moment and you don't have the idea of it being a bad thing. But what will you think when the person you love will have sex with somebody else based on your opinion that sex is that plain and simple? If you will still think that it's ok, because like you said, you're just enjoying a part of life, then chastity should not be an issue for you. But in my opinion, thats a good way to ruin a relationship. For my type of character, sex is something special and I would only fully trust myself to that one special person. There is an issue with misplacing trust and allot of it can be said regarding sex.Digi7 said:
Who said I condoned unfaithfulness? It is incredibly important to remain faithful to your partner. As I said, trust is a major part in any relationship. What I'm talking about is when you have no ties to anybody (not preferable at all, just saying.) and have free-reign. You can do what you like without hurting anybody, as long as you don't take things too far.Ardenon said:
It's when people start sleeping around when they're already in a relationship that it becomes a bad thing.
Like I said in a post before: enjoy casual sex, but you should be conservative and tasteful.
Captcha: sciation lems
As a person in the interesting scenario of being in a long term relationship person that I lost my virginity to, I can say that it can strengthen a relationship. This could be unique in that exploring sexuality together (we were both virgins when we started dating) was something that only "we" will have, so that gives us something special.
What so many people seem to ignore about chastity-until-marriage is that, regardless of what you think, the first time, especially if its for both of you, will be awkward. Holding off in exploring what is a significant part of any healthy relationship until marriage is simply preventing the relationship from fully forming until it is too late to do anything about serious problems.
And anyway, personally, I see marriage as somewhat arbitrary. I'm not saying that marriage is stupid and that I'm going to have a girlfriend for my entire life, because it does have value, and pledging commitment isn't a bad thing, but the idea that it does something magical to the relationship and now you're allowed to do things you weren't allowed to do before (ignoring social rules) is simply silly.
What so many people seem to ignore about chastity-until-marriage is that, regardless of what you think, the first time, especially if its for both of you, will be awkward. Holding off in exploring what is a significant part of any healthy relationship until marriage is simply preventing the relationship from fully forming until it is too late to do anything about serious problems.
And anyway, personally, I see marriage as somewhat arbitrary. I'm not saying that marriage is stupid and that I'm going to have a girlfriend for my entire life, because it does have value, and pledging commitment isn't a bad thing, but the idea that it does something magical to the relationship and now you're allowed to do things you weren't allowed to do before (ignoring social rules) is simply silly.
Care to elaborate? Yeah, emotions are chemical reactions within the brain, as is lust and sexual drive and anything we feel in general. I meant that sex for humans is more than just the feel-good chemicals and the need to mate.Troublesome Lagomorph said:
It all boils down to chemicals, specifically chemicals pertaining to lust. There is no love, just lust which is simply the drive to create offspring with a subject who you think will use your genes well.Digi7 said: