Poll: Who here prefers Video Games to Sex?

[SonicWaffle]

So, sorry sony, mircrosoft, nintendo and valve... but unless you really step up to plate, the vagina is by far the superior platform for me. It's miles ahead in terms of interactivity, mechanics can be a bit naff, but once you get the hang of them it's a pleasure.

<insert cliched 'menstruation as hardware failure' joke here>

That aside though, I do find fault with your logic. Vaginas, sure, got no problem with them, but that's like saying an Xbox's disc drive is the whole console. Vaginas come bundled with a whole load of other stuff, some of which may go crazy and attempt to stab you in your sleep. As far as I know, my Xbox hasn't tried that yet.

Yours probably needs a firmware update.

Xbox, or vagina?

Well if you think being stabbed in your sleep is "working as intended" I've got some news for you...

In fairness, it wasn't the vagina that tried to stab me. I imagine it would be too difficult to hold the knife handle, as vaginas can get pretty slippery. It was the rest of the unit, the non-genital parts of GirlfriendBot, which were utterly and totally insane.

Must have been a faulty model. If there's one complaint I have is that the makers don't give refunds.

Right... this metaphor may be getting too real for me.

You only have one complaint? Man, your dating life has been blessed...

 

[Ragsnstitches]

So, sorry sony, mircrosoft, nintendo and valve... but unless you really step up to plate, the vagina is by far the superior platform for me. It's miles ahead in terms of interactivity, mechanics can be a bit naff, but once you get the hang of them it's a pleasure.

<insert cliched 'menstruation as hardware failure' joke here>

That aside though, I do find fault with your logic. Vaginas, sure, got no problem with them, but that's like saying an Xbox's disc drive is the whole console. Vaginas come bundled with a whole load of other stuff, some of which may go crazy and attempt to stab you in your sleep. As far as I know, my Xbox hasn't tried that yet.

Yours probably needs a firmware update.

Xbox, or vagina?

Well if you think being stabbed in your sleep is "working as intended" I've got some news for you...

In fairness, it wasn't the vagina that tried to stab me. I imagine it would be too difficult to hold the knife handle, as vaginas can get pretty slippery. It was the rest of the unit, the non-genital parts of GirlfriendBot, which were utterly and totally insane.

Must have been a faulty model. If there's one complaint I have is that the makers don't give refunds.

Right... this metaphor may be getting too real for me.

You only have one complaint? Man, your dating life has been blessed...

I miraculously missed the "crazy ex" so many people seem to experience (and I believe them, as I know a few people, boys and girls, who ARE the crazy ex). I wouldn't say I'm blessed though. Extremely cautious maybe.

 

[SonicWaffle]

So, sorry sony, mircrosoft, nintendo and valve... but unless you really step up to plate, the vagina is by far the superior platform for me. It's miles ahead in terms of interactivity, mechanics can be a bit naff, but once you get the hang of them it's a pleasure.

<insert cliched 'menstruation as hardware failure' joke here>

That aside though, I do find fault with your logic. Vaginas, sure, got no problem with them, but that's like saying an Xbox's disc drive is the whole console. Vaginas come bundled with a whole load of other stuff, some of which may go crazy and attempt to stab you in your sleep. As far as I know, my Xbox hasn't tried that yet.

Yours probably needs a firmware update.

Xbox, or vagina?

Well if you think being stabbed in your sleep is "working as intended" I've got some news for you...

In fairness, it wasn't the vagina that tried to stab me. I imagine it would be too difficult to hold the knife handle, as vaginas can get pretty slippery. It was the rest of the unit, the non-genital parts of GirlfriendBot, which were utterly and totally insane.

Must have been a faulty model. If there's one complaint I have is that the makers don't give refunds.

Right... this metaphor may be getting too real for me.

You only have one complaint? Man, your dating life has been blessed...

I miraculously missed the "crazy ex" so many people seem to experience (and I believe them, as I know a few people, boys and girls, who ARE the crazy ex). I wouldn't say I'm blessed though. Extremely cautious maybe.

Would you like to trade? I have nothing but crazy exes! There's apparently just something about me that causes women to flip the fuck out, and then when I break up with them they go even further off the rails. My only function as a sexual being seems to be putting more and more mentally and emotionally damaged girls into circulation on the dating scene.

Really sorry about that, fellas. I promise it wasn't intentional :-/

 

[BOOM headshot65]

For me and my girlfriend: Its definately video games. We just dont see the appeal of sex and it has been thrown into the "Will be done to have children once married" pile. Other than that, stick a controller in our hands, and then we will be slicing zombies on Left 4 Dead 2, or Hacking through waves of mooks on Dynasty Warriors: Gundam 3, or she will be punching people as I snipe them on Borderlands 2, or I will be teaching her how to shoot on Fallout New Vegas.

 

[Eclectic Dreck]

It depends entire on my mood. Having been in a sexual relationship long enough, I've found that the offer of sex is not immediately a dominant thing in my life. Turns out it is entirely possible for a male to "not be in the mood". That isn't to say that if I just went ahead an had sex it wouldn't be enjoyable, simply that sometimes I'd rather do something else.

Now, if you'd asked me 20 months ago the same question the answer would have been sex without reservation. I can't think of a less crude way to put this but when one does not have a reliable "supply" any offer would be jumped on like a proverbial drink of water to a man in a desert.

 

[TheDoctor455]

Games.

But then, I'm asexual, so bit of a no-brainer for me.

 

[Ragsnstitches]

So, sorry sony, mircrosoft, nintendo and valve... but unless you really step up to plate, the vagina is by far the superior platform for me. It's miles ahead in terms of interactivity, mechanics can be a bit naff, but once you get the hang of them it's a pleasure.

<insert cliched 'menstruation as hardware failure' joke here>

That aside though, I do find fault with your logic. Vaginas, sure, got no problem with them, but that's like saying an Xbox's disc drive is the whole console. Vaginas come bundled with a whole load of other stuff, some of which may go crazy and attempt to stab you in your sleep. As far as I know, my Xbox hasn't tried that yet.

Yours probably needs a firmware update.

Xbox, or vagina?

Well if you think being stabbed in your sleep is "working as intended" I've got some news for you...

In fairness, it wasn't the vagina that tried to stab me. I imagine it would be too difficult to hold the knife handle, as vaginas can get pretty slippery. It was the rest of the unit, the non-genital parts of GirlfriendBot, which were utterly and totally insane.

Must have been a faulty model. If there's one complaint I have is that the makers don't give refunds.

Right... this metaphor may be getting too real for me.

You only have one complaint? Man, your dating life has been blessed...

I miraculously missed the "crazy ex" so many people seem to experience (and I believe them, as I know a few people, boys and girls, who ARE the crazy ex). I wouldn't say I'm blessed though. Extremely cautious maybe.

Would you like to trade? I have nothing but crazy exes! There's apparently just something about me that causes women to flip the fuck out, and then when I break up with them they go even further off the rails. My only function as a sexual being seems to be putting more and more mentally and emotionally damaged girls into circulation on the dating scene.

Really sorry about that, fellas. I promise it wasn't intentional :-/

Have you tried Ctrl+Alt+Delete, then going into the task manager and disabling any unnecessary pro... ah fuck it, I'm not even sure where I was going with this.

It's time to put this metaphor to rest.

I MAKE MY OWN RULEZ!

 

[VladG]

Ehhhhh.... tough one. There's really no binary choice here.


Depending on how much work I have to do to get to the sex, with whom, my mood, the quality of games in a given period and how long it's been, the answers pretty much can span the entire range.

And it's not restricted to games exactly... gaming makes up the vast majority of my leisure time, but it can very well be replaced by something else without being missed (unfortunately I live a very boring life) and that something else would still have the same conditions.

 

[Doclector]

Games.

Mostly because I can't get any sex right now.

 

[DugMachine]

Hmm that is a hard one. I love sex but it's not something I do for 20+ hours a week on average so I'm gonna go with games. Hopefully by the time I'm 50 or whatever and my little dude craps out on me I can still play games.

edit: This is all assuming I'm not on a dry spell to begin with. Being with my gal for over a year and we've had a metric fuckton of sex. That 24/7 need to shag is pretty much gone. Once or twice a week is fine for me.

 

[SonicWaffle]

So, sorry sony, mircrosoft, nintendo and valve... but unless you really step up to plate, the vagina is by far the superior platform for me. It's miles ahead in terms of interactivity, mechanics can be a bit naff, but once you get the hang of them it's a pleasure.

<insert cliched 'menstruation as hardware failure' joke here>

That aside though, I do find fault with your logic. Vaginas, sure, got no problem with them, but that's like saying an Xbox's disc drive is the whole console. Vaginas come bundled with a whole load of other stuff, some of which may go crazy and attempt to stab you in your sleep. As far as I know, my Xbox hasn't tried that yet.

Yours probably needs a firmware update.

Xbox, or vagina?

Well if you think being stabbed in your sleep is "working as intended" I've got some news for you...

In fairness, it wasn't the vagina that tried to stab me. I imagine it would be too difficult to hold the knife handle, as vaginas can get pretty slippery. It was the rest of the unit, the non-genital parts of GirlfriendBot, which were utterly and totally insane.

Must have been a faulty model. If there's one complaint I have is that the makers don't give refunds.

Right... this metaphor may be getting too real for me.

You only have one complaint? Man, your dating life has been blessed...

I miraculously missed the "crazy ex" so many people seem to experience (and I believe them, as I know a few people, boys and girls, who ARE the crazy ex). I wouldn't say I'm blessed though. Extremely cautious maybe.

Would you like to trade? I have nothing but crazy exes! There's apparently just something about me that causes women to flip the fuck out, and then when I break up with them they go even further off the rails. My only function as a sexual being seems to be putting more and more mentally and emotionally damaged girls into circulation on the dating scene.

Really sorry about that, fellas. I promise it wasn't intentional :-/

Have you tried Ctrl+Alt+Delete, then going into the task manager and disabling any unnecessary pro... ah fuck it, I'm not even sure where I was going with this.

It's time to put this metaphor to rest.

I MAKE MY OWN RULEZ!

Whatever the fuck just happened there, it was awesome. Reminded me of the old Trigger Happy episodes, with the brawling dogs :-D

 

[Rangerboy87]

Sex.

Games are fun, but sex is better. The graphics, the gameplay, the whole experience.

Ok, that quote just made my day! And I completely agree. Kinect will never be as engaging.

 

[Ragsnstitches]

So, sorry sony, mircrosoft, nintendo and valve... but unless you really step up to plate, the vagina is by far the superior platform for me. It's miles ahead in terms of interactivity, mechanics can be a bit naff, but once you get the hang of them it's a pleasure.

<insert cliched 'menstruation as hardware failure' joke here>

That aside though, I do find fault with your logic. Vaginas, sure, got no problem with them, but that's like saying an Xbox's disc drive is the whole console. Vaginas come bundled with a whole load of other stuff, some of which may go crazy and attempt to stab you in your sleep. As far as I know, my Xbox hasn't tried that yet.

Yours probably needs a firmware update.

Xbox, or vagina?

Well if you think being stabbed in your sleep is "working as intended" I've got some news for you...

In fairness, it wasn't the vagina that tried to stab me. I imagine it would be too difficult to hold the knife handle, as vaginas can get pretty slippery. It was the rest of the unit, the non-genital parts of GirlfriendBot, which were utterly and totally insane.

Must have been a faulty model. If there's one complaint I have is that the makers don't give refunds.

Right... this metaphor may be getting too real for me.

You only have one complaint? Man, your dating life has been blessed...

I miraculously missed the "crazy ex" so many people seem to experience (and I believe them, as I know a few people, boys and girls, who ARE the crazy ex). I wouldn't say I'm blessed though. Extremely cautious maybe.

Would you like to trade? I have nothing but crazy exes! There's apparently just something about me that causes women to flip the fuck out, and then when I break up with them they go even further off the rails. My only function as a sexual being seems to be putting more and more mentally and emotionally damaged girls into circulation on the dating scene.

Really sorry about that, fellas. I promise it wasn't intentional :-/

Have you tried Ctrl+Alt+Delete, then going into the task manager and disabling any unnecessary pro... ah fuck it, I'm not even sure where I was going with this.

It's time to put this metaphor to rest.

I MAKE MY OWN RULEZ!

Whatever the fuck just happened there, it was awesome. Reminded me of the old Trigger Happy episodes, with the brawling dogs :-D

It's from an add for cheese believe or not.

Here is all of them for your viewing pleasure:

 

[Kyber]

If i had to give up one of those, i would give up sex, games are just so much more.

 

[s0p0g]

And really, honestly...it ain't as fun as a lot of games.

Then something surrounding/involved in the whole thing is wrong - besides comparing apples with oranges here - be it the way you're doing it, or whom you're doing (it to/with), i don't know.


The poll's results so far are kind of scary, or the average member age is even lower than i thought.

 

[One Shot wonder]

I haven't had sex in over a year, it doesn't bother me too badly. I haven't played any games since 2PM, after nearly three hours in the Physics department trying to make the Runge-Kutta method work in python, that does bother me.

Well, my answer should be obvious.

 

[disgruntledgamer]

What do you mean by isn't physically able, he's got a tongue doesn't he? Even if I was in a wheelchair I'd still be able to whenever you wanted. You sure he's just not being selfish?

He's startlingly willing to just tend to me when he can't actually get off himself, but that's not as much fun. If I just wanted to get off by myself I'd buy a dildo and make some ice cubes. Being pleasured by an unaroused partner isn't the kind of sex I want to be having, it's the shared experience that I like much more than just having an orgasm at the end.

Yeah... that's kinda odd; I think I might know whats wrong as I've seen similar problems before. Let me ask you something does your BF wear ankle socks, really tight jeans? How clean and neat are his nails more so than yours?

Yeah, that's kinda...no. You really don't want that. Trust me.

Unless you're some kind of superhuman you will not be able to keep up. This will not only be disappointing and annoying for her, but will make you feel bad because you're upsetting her. Based on my own personal experience with that kind of girl (hurray, anecdotes!) she will start looking for it elsewhere because you can't satisfy her as much as she requires. There can also be a pretty upsetting circumstance where she won't take no for an answer, if you take my meaning, and since getting an erection is something that happens whether you want it to or not she'll end up getting her way no matter how many times you've said no.

A girl with unlimited sex drive is the kind of thing horny teenagers dream about, but in practice it's pretty fucked up.

Don't underestimate me dude, I'd be more than willing to step up to the challenge. I'm also very cool with her not taking no for an answer, in fact that would probably be a turn on for me, I admire persistence.

%$^$#ed up is also my type.

 

[MrPeanut]

...Why does the escapist place such a high value on sex? I've seen it on a couple of threads now.

I just don't understand.

 

[gazumped]

Yeah... that's kinda odd; I think I might know whats wrong as I've seen similar problems before. Let me ask you something does your BF wear ankle socks, really tight jeans? How clean and neat are his nails more so than yours?

Ha. His nails are grubby and his fingers are chewed to shreds and he's generally a scruffy geezer who only showers once a week. But hey, I'm sure there are scruffy gay guys out there.

The problem seems to stem from over-stimulation dulling his sensitivity. He watches a lot of freaky porn often, and standard sex is hard to get interested in when you've been regularly getting off to stuff like that. And there's only so much non-standard sex you can have, that level of aggression means bruising and soreness for both parties.

Not masturbating for four days after a weekend away with friends seemed to help a great deal, though...