Popular misconceptions about your area(s) of expertise...

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Techsmart07

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Mar 5, 2011
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My areas of expertise are in Computer Science and Physics (at least that's what the papers say).
I have to elaborate on the hacking one. half of the people think everything in computer science is some incredibly hard and complicated system that just creating calculator for windows is an undertaking worthy of a nobel prize. The other half think everything is easy and is done with simple click and dragging interfaces. For example, lots of people ive spoken to want an android app. Thing is, the parts they want are fairly complicated, but they think it's a cakewalk and that I should have one done in a matter of 3-4 hours. In other cases, I talk about some little insignificant program I made, and they become engrossed in it like I just brought up their favorite video game.

In physics, Everyone thinks they have the solution to the problems and full understanding of the situation. In reality, they haven't got a clue, but because they see someone else give a general talk about it, they are experts all of a sudden. For example, one of my friends approached me because he knew I majored in physics and said "I think I know the solution to string theory, I just need someone to do all the math." To me, that's like saying "I think I understand how derivatives work, now I just need you to do all the math." In another scenario, my friend was trying to tell me that time travel is a simple process involving going faster than light, which he thought was an easy process. After spending 20 minutes arguing with him and trying to explain how relativity works, I gave up because he refused to accept that the problem was not as simple as he thinks.
 

RonHiler

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Sep 16, 2004
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Game Systems Programmer.

Of course, many people think all I do all day is play games. Which is of course complete bullshit. What I do all day is design code, stare at code, write code, debug code, and optimize code. If I have the game running, it's because I'm looking to see if whatever system I'm working on at the moment is doing what I want it to do, not because I'm playing. Generally, when I have a build going, it only for a few seconds at a time, because that's how long it takes me to determine if what I did worked or if it needs tweaking/fixing.

I know quite a few people in game development. None of them sit around all day playing games. There is no such job (unless you are one of those professional game players that competes in tournys I suppose, heh). The closest you could come is to get a job in QA. But even those guys are not "playing", they are looking for bugs, running through the same areas over and over and over again, and then writing reports about it. Not exactly fun.

It's a pet peeve of mine when I tell someone what I do, and they comment with something like "oh, so you play games for a living, cool!". Grrrrrr. That's why I tend not to tell people very often.
 

Darken12

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Apr 16, 2011
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"No, I am not allowed to interrogate suspects. That's for the police to do. In fact, I'm pretty sure that me talking to the suspects or being anywhere near an interrogation room would be enough for the Defence to file for a mistrial."

Or, the one that sums up everything and works for every occasion:

"Forensic science does not work that way."

and

"I would be in jail for even thinking about half the stuff House does."
 

Chappy

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May 17, 2010
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Have you ever watched an Episode of CSI? Though it contains true that is the source and bane off all my popular misconceptions.

Sadly it seems with the TV show comes people who think they now know more than the actual people who have studied for five years or more in the subject, They really don't.
 

Something Amyss

Aswyng and Amyss
Dec 3, 2008
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TopazFusion said:
I've worked in photographic enhancement, and the number of times I've been presented with a shitty little thumbnail and requested to somehow turn it into a high quality, poster-sized image is beyond belief.

I'm sorry, this ain't CSI.

Not exactly the same thing, but I work tech support for a few local businesses, and occasionally they ask me to do the impossible (or infeasible) because of misconceptions based on CSI or some other forensics show where computers are magic.
 

FEichinger

Senior Member
Aug 7, 2011
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DoPo said:
And more on computer science/programming - just because something seems easy to you, doesn't mean it's that easy to code. "It's just a minor thing, why don't you add it" - fuck you, no - it's not you deciding if it's minor or not. Yes, it could be but also you could be an absolute idiot. I worked as a web developer for a while - the number of times we've had clients saying "Oh, can you just add X" and expect it would take, like 5 minutes, just because it's, say, another item on the menu of a website...when it would actually mean adding a whole new module to the system, configure it, maybe even write parts of it (or all of it) from scratch, test it, come up with a suitable front end design. Or alternatively

(before release)
"Are you happy with what you have now?"
"Oh, yes, quite happy"
"Do you see any mistakes? Or maybe anything missing?"
"No, no, it's fine"
"Are you sure? Do you want us to go live as it is?"
"Yes, of course - go ahead"

(a day after release)
"Hmm, it looks good but I found some things I want changed" *lists a dozen corrections ranging from bugs to just different customization - minor but would still take at least an hour or so* "Also, I think it would be better if we have these" *lists several outright changes in core functionality and/or completely new stuff* "So can I have them fixed as soon as possible?"
Sooo bloody true. That's why I started requesting a 12-month-plan for the thing before I even start working on it - no matter how "minor" it is. I want people to think shit through before coming to me to "just do that". Also: OOPHP 5.3+ made modular development much easier ... But of course one has to build the entire code core from scratch to use it in the future.
 

Mavrantzas

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Nov 13, 2009
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As a translator - mentioning what I do, and being asked "so, how many languages do you speak". Somehow, people expect translators to speak 10 languages?
 

Quantumsheep

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Aug 25, 2012
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I'm not a professional writer or author (yet) so I can't claim any expertise beyond amateur level. But I HATE it when people think that writing is some easy past-time anyone can get into, or alternately, that you require some innate genius. Good writing is incredibly complicated, but so many people don't even think about how much structure, forethought and planning even the most basic piece of writing requires. Narrative, pacing, flow, diction, characterization, symbolism, foreshadowing, just off the top of my head, all need to be present, done well, and function as a cohesive whole. And of course before all that you just need to know basic things, like proper grammar, spelling and how to write metaphors and similes that don't suck, which apparently most people aren't willing to do. And while a natural talent does help, anyone can learn to write well, it just requires a lot of practice, I'd say as much as any other artistic medium you care to name.
 

ImmortalDrifter

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Jan 6, 2011
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I hate that people think being a chef makes you either

A.) British

B.) A flamboyant homosexual

C.) Emeril Lagasse

I am none of those things, and the jokes only stay funny for so long.
 

bl4ckh4wk64

Walking Mass Effect Codex
Jun 11, 2010
1,277
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World War II, I've been studying it since I was about eight years old. Granted, when I was 8, all I was able to do was really recognize the difference between different classes of naval warship, but still... Basically, most things I've seen people spout on the internet are sometimes right, but usually wrong. I'd like to say I'm also an expert on the Mass Effect universe, hence the custom title, but I haven't read the comics, only wiki'd them so I'm fairly shot of knowledge there.

Oh, also firearms. I'll discuss anything about firearms with anyone anywhere, and almost everything I've seen from people on the internet, aside from a select few, shows that they know anything about them besides what they've seen on Futureweapons (joke show) and in Call of Duty. They seem to think that there is absolutely no difference between 7.62x54, 7.62x51, and 7.62x39, and think that they are interchangeable rounds. They seem to believe that an AK is innacurate because Call of Duty says it is. They seem to think the entirety of someone's effectiveness with a firearm is based on the gun itself rather than the shooter. I could go on for hours, but I have some Japanese homework to catch up on.
 

SckizoBoy

Ineptly Chaotic
Legacy
Jan 6, 2011
8,678
200
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A Hermit's Cave
bl4ckh4wk64 said:
World War II, I've been studying it since I was about eight years old. Granted, when I was 8, all I was able to do was really recognize the difference between different classes of naval warship, but still... Basically, most things I've seen people spout on the internet are sometimes right, but usually wrong.
Such as...? Just so I can spew some vitriol as well...(!) -_-

Oh, also firearms. I'll discuss anything about firearms with anyone anywhere, and almost everything I've seen from people on the internet, aside from a select few, shows that they know anything about them besides what they've seen on Futureweapons (joke show) and in Call of Duty. They seem to think that there is absolutely no difference between 7.62x54, 7.62x51, and 7.62x39, and think that they are interchangeable rounds. They seem to believe that an AK is innacurate because Call of Duty says it is. They seem to think the entirety of someone's effectiveness with a firearm is based on the gun itself rather than the shooter. I could go on for hours, but I have some Japanese homework to catch up on.
Bullshit! The AK-47's pretty accurate in CoD games! =P
 

bl4ckh4wk64

Walking Mass Effect Codex
Jun 11, 2010
1,277
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SckizoBoy said:
bl4ckh4wk64 said:
World War II, I've been studying it since I was about eight years old. Granted, when I was 8, all I was able to do was really recognize the difference between different classes of naval warship, but still... Basically, most things I've seen people spout on the internet are sometimes right, but usually wrong.
Such as...? Just so I can spew some vitriol as well...(!) -_-
Well, there was this one time I was having a conversation with someone about the Battle of the Denmark Strait. The other person refused to believe that if the Prince of Wales wasn't plagued with problems, mostly in the turrets, and the Bismark wasn't incredibly lucky with a couple shots, the battle wouldn't have been such a massive morale destroyer for the British Navy. The Hood and PoW would most likely have taken even more damage, and maybe one would have been lost, but the Bismark would have been lost as well. Then there was another conversation about the actual effectiveness of the U.S. Army Rangers at Pointe du Hoc. He/she seemed to think that they were utterly useless and that the landings wouldn't have been any worse if they hadn't been there.

Then there's the common, "America won the war by herself!" belief. I'm American, studying history, and this is really just infuriating for me. It's not only wrong, but it continues the belief that Americans are all gung-ho retards that know nothing of History and continually believe that America is "teh greatest thing evar!"
 

Ryotknife

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Oct 15, 2011
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As an engineer, people think that I can fix anything and everything regardless of the expertise actually needed for the problem at hand.
 

bl4ckh4wk64

Walking Mass Effect Codex
Jun 11, 2010
1,277
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0
Ryotknife said:
As an engineer, people think that I can fix anything and everything regardless of the expertise actually needed for the problem at hand.
... but what did you go to engineering school for if you can't do that?
 

Little Woodsman

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Nov 11, 2012
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Angie7F said:
Little Woodsman said:
Cosmetics sales...that's a new one on me, where I live it's mostly supplements & dietary aids.
But the other misconceptions about us are hair-pullingly bad as well, the worst of course is
the idea that we're all really prostitutes...ewwwww....
That, and/ or we are all lesbians...
Well, I've certainly never had anyone think that I'm a lesbian....though many people do
seem to think that male MT's must be either gay or sexual predators.
 

Little Woodsman

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Nov 11, 2012
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Arqus_Zed said:
People who think J.K. Rowling invented the Phoenix.
I kid you not.

I have a great interest in myths and legends - like many people, I guess. More specifically, demonology and judo-christian lore (Key of Solomon, Paradise Lost, Divina Comedia, etc.). Of course, once you get in that territory, you come across some Aleister Crowley stuff as well.

And just in general, I don't have a problem when people use names of demons for their own character (Amon, Azazel, Asteroth are some of the more popular ones), just because "they sound cool". However, I do get annoyed when people learn about some mythical entity in a book and then assume the writer is responsible for its creation - even more so if they start altering the mythos surrounding it.

I'm not even sure if this pet peeve is against the writer or the reader.
Aaaagh, this reminded me that a few years ago I met a young woman who thought that fairies (as in
all fey beings--pixies, trolls, sprites, boggarts etc....) were invented by DISNEY! I pointed out
to her that at the very least she should be aware that A Midsummer Night's Dream featured fairies,
and Shakespeare was around *slightly* before Disney......
She just stared at me blankly.....
 

Atmos Duality

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Mar 3, 2010
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Meteorologist Misconceptions:

That we all work on or with TV stations.

And that we can use the magic of Radar/Satellite/Computers to predict the weather more than a week in advance, accurate to within a few miles of any given location.

(Oh, thanks Weather Channel. Thanks for perpetuating this idiocy with a 30 day forecast. A forecast you might as well have created with Tarot Cards and an Ouija Board. Fucking model-jockeys...)

Or how we all love disastrous storms and weather....actually, that one is pretty accurate, though not absolutely true.
I've noticed ALL of my fellow meteorologist-types are touched with some (however great/small) sort of madness or quirk.