Public Displays of Affection

[Dr. Danger]

It only gets aggravating when they are attached at the hip and that only stems from my own personal views on what a healthy relationship is.

 

[Connor Lonske]

I don't get offended easily, so you can do what the fuck you want to your man/woman in public. Doesn't bother me!

 

[MadMechanic]

Hand holding is considered fine by me. I'd say anything up to, but not including full on kissing is fine. Anything more, and please keep it private/out of site.

I don't know, maybe I'm just bitter because I'm single. And I get embarrassed at the site of other people's PDAs.
Such as at my old school - separate boy/girl schools, split by like 1 street. Known as "shag alley" because that's where all the PDAs happen. You really don't know which way to look without being call a pervert when walking along that street, which I had to do a fair bit to go to my shared english lessons at the girls school.

 

[wrightguy0]

genuine displays of affection like cuddling on a bench, kissing in public (peck or on the lips is fine) hand holding and anything that shows that a couple is in love are fine, sexual gestures, groping, and just being sleazy are not and s kept to a night club or a private room or residence

 

[gallaetha_matt]

Hand holding and public kissing used to really annoy me when I was growing up. I was a fat kid who couldn't get dates, so seeing happy couples made me all kinds of bitter.

But now that I've grown into a muscular adult (who still can't dates) it doesn't bug me so much. I'm perfectly fine with people being affectionate in public. I've got my own shit to deal with, man - I can't be being depressed over happy couples when I've got work (video games) to do (play).

But if it really bugs people I think I have a solution. I say that everybody should get to make out with everybody. But we take it further than that.

Do I need to spell it out? Orgies. Everything needs to be an orgy. I want to power fuck my way to work instead of getting the train. I want to wear a fabulous robe and refer to myself by my orgy name of 'Lord Dynamic Thrust' and I would only ever refer to myself in the third person. It'd be thrilling. Stress levels would be reduced, everybody would be happier and we'd solve this public displays of affection problem. I mean it's hard to prudish or bitter when you're balls deep inside a total stranger.

Yes, my therapy is going quite well.

 

[Artina89]

I don't mind PDA's personally. As long as they are not having sex in front of me, I don't care really. It's none of my business what they do and how they choose to profess their love. I wouldn't like it if someone bounded over to me telling me to stop making out with my boyfriend so I am not going to get involved if that is what they choose to do.

 

[Duruznik]

Not my place to tell them what they can and can't do. I don't care if he's got her bent over the public fountain and they're going to town so to speak. I'll just shrug and keep on my business.

This. I never got what's the big deal about PDAs. Why should I care what they do, as long as they're not breaking any decency laws?

 

[sarahvait]

I feel like everyone who answers this thread should have to state whether or not they're virgins.

That being said: I'm not a huge fan of face-sucking, slobbery, exhibitionist PDA amongst couples of any age or sex. But those of you who are all, "I DUN LIEK IT CUZ RELASHUNSHIPS R SHOWOFFS" -- dude. Come on. Very few people are pecking each other on the cheek to rub their happiness in your face.

I like to hold hands with my boyfriend. Not all the time, but sometimes. And sometimes I like to kiss him on the cheek or touch the back of his head or give him a handie or whatever. It has nothing to do with showing off. It's more "I feel strongly affectionate right now and I want to express that." Witnesses tend not to be a factor.

I mean, I hug my parents and my siblings, too. I am definitely not thinking, "HA HA, THAT DUDE LOOKS LIKE HE'S AN ORPHAN. WATCH ME HUG MOMMY, ORPHANBOY."

Kissing -- sweetly, chastely -- feels nice. Some of y'all could probably do it more if you weren't "barging through the middle of you Richard Ashcroft style." Uncool.

LOL. Damn first post and you're already making me laugh. You'll do fine here, I think.

The only PDAs I think are kinda stupid are the ones in the movie theaters. I mean, you wanna cuddle together and maybe kiss once or twice, that's one thing. I guess I don't mind if you want to go into full make-out mode, as long as you're not disturbing me, but why is it that some couples pay to go to a movie and then don't watch any of it because they're too busy snogging (sp?)? Why not stay home on the couch and stream netflix? Are you just wanting to show off in front of an audience or what? I'm not sure it even bugs me, but I am honestly a bit confused about the whole thing.

 

[Broady Brio]

Strong PDA's unnerve me.

Maybe because I haven't experienced it before.

Arm in arm? Fine.
Hugs? People I know hug pretty much everyone they know. Perfectly acceptable.

Spoiler: Eating their face on the bench?

 

[Cavatica]

I feel like everyone who answers this thread should have to state whether or not they're virgins.

I am a virgin, and if you've seen any of my other posts on any other relationship threads, this should be obvious to you. I have significant psychological problems which have made it impossible for me to find a relationship, and anybody reminding me of what I can't ever have makes me frustrated.

No, I haven't seen any of your other posts. I'm sorry to hear you've got some barriers, but the fact is that you're probably in a minority. I can't walk on tiptoe for every possible social contingency -- if I did that, there'd be no point leaving the house. Most human beings are social animals and will interact accordingly. I think there's a middle ground -- cheek-pecking, hand-holding, hugging, some nuzzling (as opposed to frenzied groping, tonguing, fondling, etc.) -- but I don't think it's reasonable to ask the rest of us to cease and desist, full-stop, any more than it is reasonable to ask you to indulge in full-on exhibitionism.

Nothing personal. It's just, I'm a mammal. And generally speaking, mammals snuggle.

 

[Not-here-anymore]

I mean, I hug my parents and my siblings, too. I am definitely not thinking, "HA HA, THAT DUDE LOOKS LIKE HE'S AN ORPHAN. WATCH ME HUG MOMMY, ORPHANBOY."

Wait, am I the only one who persuades my family to go to orphanages just to do that? Oh. Now I feel like kind of a dick... I guess it's probably a bad move when I start going 'Mummy, can we get that one, please? Actually, no, he smells funny. How about this one?', too. Honestly, you people and your morals take all the fun out of orphan-baiting.

OT: Anything beyond a quick kiss seems a bit much, I guess. Hand-holding, hugging, basically anything short of full on making-out. It's too private an act to do in public, and comes across as either showing off or exhibitionist-y. (Although it'd be probably be pretty romantic if done in a street-lit road with a light snowfall...)
Those are the rules I play by, anyway. Besides, I'm terrible at expressing any form of emotional sentiment verbally. Hand-holding's all I've got to show affection with.

 

[Cavatica]

Why not stay home on the couch and stream netflix? Are you just wanting to show off in front of an audience or what? I'm not sure it even bugs me, but I am honestly a bit confused about the whole thing.

I have been dating my current boyfriend for about five months. In those five months, I don't believe that we have yet completed a movie -- in any genre -- without stopping to swap all kinds of fluids.

That being the case, movie theaters are effectively an additional form of birth control.

Just sayin'.

 

[OmniscientOstrich]

Kissing and anything up to the point is fine, but hands-on-bodies is probably where I'd draw the line.
Cuddling when sitting is alright too.

Pretty much that. I'm pretty uncomfortable seeing PDA in general, although I'm in no way entitled to tell others what they can/can't do in public so I'd leave them be and just try to ignore them no matter what they're doing.

 

[Dr Snakeman]

Mild PDA is perfectly okay. I'm actually kind of appalled that some people take issue with hand-holding in public. I don't normally generalize, but I think it's safe to say that if you have a problem with that, you are either a total prude, or just really, really bitter that you don't have anyone to hold your hand.

Public face-sucking, however, is not acceptable. Ever. Find somewhere more private to do that.

 

[Thistlehart]

I hardly care, really. Though I'd call them out for being stupid if they got offended when someone stared.

 

[Cavatica]

Mild PDA is perfectly okay. I'm actually kind of appalled that some people take issue with hand-holding in public. I don't normally generalize, but I think it's safe to say that if you have a problem with that, you are either a total prude, or just really, really bitter that you don't have anyone to hold your hand.

Yannow? 4-year-olds hold hands. Little old people who've been married for 50 years hold hands. Non-shitty parents hold their kids' hands to make sure said kids don't bolt and get mowed down by traffic. Holding hands is like the most chaste thing there is (well, next to not holding hands). Hold away.

 

[orangeban]

I really don't have a problem with them. As long as it doesn't descend to them having sex in the street, I think it's personally fine (as long as they don't break exposure laws and whatnot).
And in regards to the OP's friend, if I were holding someones hand in public and they asked me to stop I would go tell them to take the stick out their arse and jam it through their throat. Seriously, what kind of person goes, "Grr, two people enjoying each others company in a way that is firstly none of my business and secondly not affecting me at all. Fuck those guys."

 

[aegix drakan_v1legacy]

Hand holding is okay, but anything beyond that bothers me, because it shows that they think they are superior for being in a relationship and not single, and everyone else is an insignificant worm.

Or maybe they're just happy to be together and don't feel like holding it in because it might upset some sensitive solo people?

I hug and kiss my girlfriend in public all the time, and it's NOT because I think we're superior because we're dating. We do it because we love each other and we both happen to be there at that time together. It's not like we're making a spectacle of ourselves, so I don't think it's a problem.

Sorry if that bothers you, man. *shrug*

 

[Nouw]

As long as it doesn't break any laws or social customs of that place, it's fine. i.e. Not making anyone uncomfortable.

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

So, how does The Escapist feel about public displays of affection? Should a couple's intimacy be hidden in public and does that extend to hand-holding? Are you entitled to ask/tell a couple to stop showing their affection in public simply because it bothers you?

Personally, I kind of like PDAs. ^^ It's fun to make people stare.

My spouse, however, less so.

Then again, looking at those two bitching on facebook from your example, OP, I'm realizing that my spouse is actually way more into PDA than those two. Yikes!