Quitting / Giving Bad news Help

[WhosJDG]

Hi,
This is probably one of the harder things I?ve ever had to do purely because of the person I'm dealing with. I'm horrible with giving bad news to people just because I don't say no to people. It?s the something that's hard for me. Either way so here's the story and hopefully somebody can help me out with this. Back in the beginning of summer I signed up for a marching band class in order to spend more time with the girlfriend. I pledged and said that I was going to be participating in all of the events activities practices all that but the problem is I guess things didn't really work out. I didn't realize exactly how much time and dedication it was going to take and since it broke up with my girlfriend right before the seasons just about to start and I've realized that I really hate it. I hate the class because it takes up so much time and I really don't feel like it what's right for me. I spend so much time just doing other things that whenever I get the class I hate everything I do there because it feels like a waste. So now comes the hard part, I'm in regular band class that I've been doing all through high school and I have no problem with that whatsoever. The teacher for marching band is the exact same teacher who teaches regular band and staying on his good side is probably the best you can do because of how aggressive and just in your face is. He's a nice guy but when push comes to shove he will always be in your face and he?s surely not somebody you want to get on his bad side. I've made the decision that I no longer want to participate in the fall marching band but the problem is I have to tell him since I?ve already pledged and he thinks I'm participating. How should I go about telling him that I really don't want to do marching band without making him so frustrated and without having it just completely affect my overall relationship with him? My original thought was just to be honest with him talk to him privately and just discuss how I really didn't like it and that I wasn't wanting to do it anymore. I don't want to beat around the bush for it. My other idea was to just tell him that I really don't like it and I don't have enough time to attend all the practices and put in dedication which is also true. Either way let me know, any response is appreciated. How should I go about telling him that I no longer want to be in the marching band class without affecting my relationship with him and having him completely dislike me for the remainder of the school year since I?m in one and his other classes. Any help is appreciated thank you very much.

Thanks again!

-Derek

 

[Barbas]

OK, first thing's first, don't worry overmuch about him disliking you for telling the truth. You're clearly sorry that you can't meet his expectations and, as you said, you've realized you no longer have the time that you had planned to put into it in the first place. You can only do so much and you wanted to be a part of it but something unforeseeable happened. If your heart is no longer in it, then that's the way it is. He might be disappointed to hear that, but like you said, he's a good guy so you should do him the courtesy of telling him as soon as you can.

I wouldn't tell him that you feel the classes are a waste, but that you just can't physically put in the dedication you want to with everything else that's going on. The sooner you tell him, the sooner he can find a suitable replacement and if he cares as much about the marching band as you say he does then he'll want everyone to be bang on the money. Don't let your performance in the regular band class slacken and I'm sure you'll do fine!

 

[Random Argument Man]

There's nothing wrong with telling him that you want to quit. It's always better to be direct, but respectful when you're telling this kind of news. If he's being "in your face about it", don't get angry. Act professional and you'll be fine.

Also, never tell a teacher that something that's been taught is a waste. I'm working in education and this is one of those things that will backfire rather quickly.