Race/Ethnicty in Attraction and Dating

[Frankster]

Do you date outside your race? If so how often?
I dated an indian chick once and that's about it.

How do you view racial prefrences as whole? (in society)
I think people are far too stuck up and afraid to be honest about their natural preferences in most circumstances. I've known people who were afraid to admit they only liked to date their own race and im like, why?

Do you find yourself attracted or not attracted to certain race or races?
Yup i have specific tastes and i know what they are. Caucasian girls and i strongly prefer brunettes if possible. I feel nothing for black women by contrast, 0 attraction towards them. I do feel some positive attractions towards asians though, which i can't honestly explain, like i find some asians super cute but not others, i think it's something to do with facial structure, cos im SUPER into faces i find cute.

Can you describe why you might have these prefrences/dislikes?
I honestly have no idea, maybe it's a genetic thing, my dad after all went for a european girl rather then marry into his own culture.

Do you think your mind has changed about any of this from the past or is subject to change in the future?
Nope, this is one area of my life i've always felt comfortable and secure in and don't see why i would change my mind on this.

 

[Thaluikhain]

We don't do race in Israel (mostly), we do religion, so I'd be okay dating a women of any race as long as she's either jewish/converts to Judaism or we agree to raise our kids as Jews (and I love her). It might seem a bit villainous to some people, but I do like my culture and rather have it keep going.

Eh, seems more reasonable to exclude someone based on how they think and act then what family they were born into.

 

[Chimpzy_v1legacy]

Do you date outside your race? If so how often?

I haven't yet. Not because I'm opposed to the idea, not at all, but simply because it just hasn't happened. I wouldn't pass up dating a woman I'm into because she's black, latina, asian or whatever else.

How do you view racial prefrences as whole? (in society)

The loins desire what they they desire. Not my place to say they can't like X or Y. As for locally, most Belgians are fine with most interracial matches, or at least the younger generations are. There are however some prejudices against non-Muslim/Muslim couples, partially because of racism, partially because of religious reasons.

Do you find yourself attracted or not attracted to certain race or races?

On the whole, I find latina and asian women a tad more attractive than white or black women. That said, there is beauty everywhere in the world.

Can you describe why you might have these preferences/dislikes?

I find dark eyes and long black hair that isn't too curly very attractive in a woman. Both traits are more common in latina or asian women than in white or black women.

Do you think your mind has changed about any of this from the past or is subject to change in the future?

I used to be strictly into white women, as those were the only ones I had much contact with, but my tastes have diversified over the years as I've gotten more exposed to other races. No reason to believe that will change.

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

I ask you these questions.

Do you date outside your race? If so how often?
Yes, not sure what the "often" nuance here is, so I guess "sometimes" will have to do.

How do you view racial prefrences as whole? (in society)

I don't view them, that's a bizarre question and notion in general.

Do you find yourself attracted or not attracted to certain race or races?

I tend to prefer Asians.

Can you describe why you might have these prefrences/dislikes?

Appearance and cultural reasons. I tend to like petite and skinny physique which genetically presents itself in Asians the most. Culturally, I prefer people who share my interests/passions and it so happens to be that in both of those fields, Asians tend to share them the most, on average.

Do you think your mind has changed about any of this from the past or is subject to change in the future?

When I was younger I used to prefer pale redheads the most but this has changed as I grew older. I think this was mainly due to that being what my first crush looked like though. She was a friend's girl so I never approached her and I guess I ended up carrying that torch a while due to that .

Here you go, I don't think this is particularly uncomfortable at all to talk about btw.

 

[McElroy]

We don't do race in Israel (mostly), we do religion, so I'd be okay dating a women of any race as long as she's either jewish/converts to Judaism or we agree to raise our kids as Jews (and I love her). It might seem a bit villainous to some people, but I do like my culture and rather have it keep going.

Eh, seems more reasonable to exclude someone based on how they think and act then what family they were born into.

Didn't two out of his three options already have little to do with the family the partner was born into?

I find dark eyes very attractive in a woman.

You don't prefer blue eyes? Outta here!

 

[Thaluikhain]

We don't do race in Israel (mostly), we do religion, so I'd be okay dating a women of any race as long as she's either jewish/converts to Judaism or we agree to raise our kids as Jews (and I love her). It might seem a bit villainous to some people, but I do like my culture and rather have it keep going.

Eh, seems more reasonable to exclude someone based on how they think and act then what family they were born into.

Didn't two out of his three options already have little to do with the family the partner was born into?

I meant that race was dependent on family.

Those are also reasons I have. In general, I don't really think it is much difference than, for example, a vegan wanting to date another vegan.

I'd agree, it's part of the broad "compatible beliefs" thing, which is going to be important.

 

[happyninja42]

We don't do race in Israel (mostly), we do religion, so I'd be okay dating a women of any race as long as she's either jewish/converts to Judaism or we agree to raise our kids as Jews (and I love her). It might seem a bit villainous to some people, but I do like my culture and rather have it keep going.

Eh, seems more reasonable to exclude someone based on how they think and act then what family they were born into.

Didn't two out of his three options already have little to do with the family the partner was born into?

I meant that race was dependent on family.

Well religion is usually based on family too. People tend to raise their children in the beliefs they have, and those tend to be the ones that stick for most people. For example, you don't find many devout Christians raising their children as Jewish, though the child might convert at a later date to whatever new belief they choose for themselves. Usually though, they stick to what they were raised in. So in essence, that's based on family too for most people.

 

[Thaluikhain]

Well religion is usually based on family too. People tend to raise their children in the beliefs they have, and those tend to be the ones that stick for most people. For example, you don't find many devout Christians raising their children as Jewish, though the child might convert at a later date to whatever new belief they choose for themselves. Usually though, they stick to what they were raised in. So in essence, that's based on family too for most people.

Oh certainly, and politics and other ideologies as well.

However, in theory people can (and do) move away from that, your ethnicity is unlikely to change.

 

[happyninja42]

Well religion is usually based on family too. People tend to raise their children in the beliefs they have, and those tend to be the ones that stick for most people. For example, you don't find many devout Christians raising their children as Jewish, though the child might convert at a later date to whatever new belief they choose for themselves. Usually though, they stick to what they were raised in. So in essence, that's based on family too for most people.

Oh certainly, and politics and other ideologies as well.

However, in theory people can (and do) move away from that, your ethnicity is unlikely to change.

Yes I know, that's why I said things like "usually" and "tend to" etc. xD And as someone who was raised Methodist and is now Atheist, yes I can confirm people can change their worldview. Something I also stated. Just pointing out that for the majority of people, they tend to stick to the belief system they were raised with.

 

[Nickolai77]

Living in one of the more racially homogeneous parts of England I don't have much of a choice but to date other white people. I used to live in Hong Kong though and dated some locals there. I think it's only really older people in non-western countries who would have a problem with anyone dating outside their own race, anyone with modern values wouldn't really care.

I don't really have any particular racial preferences but I appreciate the generalised differences between races. East Asians tend to be smaller and slender and they dress well. Korean women dress especially well but sometimes take it a bit too far and look like they've walked straight off a catwalk. Quite a few of them were insecure about their eyes and so quite hilariously photoshopped their tinder pic profiles to make their eyes look bigger than they were with freaksish results. Most others wore glasses, which worked for me because I dig girls in glasses. A lot of them were very studious and academic which appealed to me as well.

I've seen plenty of very attractive black women in my time, they tend to be taller and curvier than East Asians. Unfortunately i'm a guy of quite modest height (5ft 7 inches or 1.7Mm) so If I were to live in an African country I might find dating some of the girls a little bit more challenging.

As for white ladies, I think the variety of hair and eye colours makes things interesting. I find red-heads very attractive, probably part of the reason why I love watching Game of Thrones! I never really got the appeal of blondes but wouldn't stop me dating one obviously! I tend to find myself most interested in women with 'dark' features- so brown/black hair really. Stick on a pair of glasses for an added bonus too! Curly hair can also be very attractive if done right- if we go by GOT characters for reference think of Meera.

 

[the December King]

I don't have much experience in dating, to be honest. But so far, the only thing I find a turn-off in dating is an overly muscled or physical woman. Call me intimidated if it makes you feel better, but it is what it is- just not interested.

Beyond that, no racial hang-ups that I can think of.

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

Well religion is usually based on family too. People tend to raise their children in the beliefs they have, and those tend to be the ones that stick for most people. For example, you don't find many devout Christians raising their children as Jewish, though the child might convert at a later date to whatever new belief they choose for themselves. Usually though, they stick to what they were raised in. So in essence, that's based on family too for most people.

Oh certainly, and politics and other ideologies as well.

However, in theory people can (and do) move away from that, your ethnicity is unlikely to change.

While your ethnicity won't ever change, your culture isn't tied to it and I find that culture is a bigger deciding factor for relationships than ethnicity in the modern era where you can be into pretty much any sub-culture you like as long as you have internet.

It may happen that certain ethnicities are more into certain cultures than others so that in turn may cause you to prefer them over others but it isn't because of the ethnicity itself but rather because of the culture that the preference exists, hence worry about it being racist and whatnot as was raised above is kinda entirely missing the point, functioning on a ye-olde notion of ethnicity that is inextricable from culture.

As someone who lived in Greece for the first 17 years of my life, this nuance is very pronounced, as a lot of people there are ethnically Arabs, at least in part, due to the centuries of Ottoman occupation. Be that as it may, by being culturally Greek, that entirely overwrites that ethnicity and makes them Greek. There's no such Arab-Greeks distinction like how you have here with Arab-Americans, if you're born there and speak the tongue you're just Greek. I think this system works in new ways now that we have the internet and people are free to learn about and participate with other cultures and it allows for people to bypass ethnicity entirely and get at what actually makes people get along.

 

[Padwolf]

Do you date outside your race? If so how often?

- I don't date anymore as I live with my boyfriend, but I have dated outside of my race before. Never really thought about it too hard. It was just "I like this guy, lets see where this goes"

How do you view racial prefrences as whole? (in society)
- Heart wants what the heart wants. Not really my place to say

Do you find yourself attracted or not attracted to certain race or races?
- I'll be honest I'm not really attracted to Indian and Asian men as a whole. Not really sure why, I mean I've seen many a good looking man that I've been attracted to, but on the whole, I dunno. I just haven't been.

Can you describe why you might have these prefrences/dislikes?
- I can't really explain it or describe why I have these dislikes. I guess because I haven't really met someone of that race I've gone "Hey I like this guy!" in that kind of way before.

Do you think your mind has changed about any of this from the past or is subject to change in the future?
- Nah probably not. Again I don't really see race when it comes to attraction. It really is "Hey I like this guy!" and that's that. If you can make me laugh and not be afraid to tell me when I'm wrong or if I'm being a *****, then I will be attracted to you!

 

[Qizx]

Wooo, aint messing about with this one, time for something a bit heavy.

So one of the most fascinating things to me as someone who works in the dating industry, is that racial discrimination(both positive and negative) is broadly socially unacceptable in all contexts apart from dating. You can hear something like " I dont find people particularly attractive" or "I find myself more drawn to qualities in people". Now I'm not saying its racism and I'm not saying its not racism, but its an aspect of preference that seems to be uncomfortable to explaore so......lets explore it.

I ask you these questions.

Do you date outside your race? If so how often?

How do you view racial prefrences as whole? (in society)

Do you find yourself attracted or not attracted to certain race or races?

Can you describe why you might have these prefrences/dislikes?

Do you think your mind has changed about any of this from the past or is subject to change in the future?

I will answer theese myself, but feel free to go first. Unlike my other threads, this is a fairly serious topic so I although I would usually encourage it, I ask that the snark be kept to a minimum.

1) I would if it had come up, however I am now in a 5 year relationship with someone and all previous relationships were within my race so not looking likely to change.

2) I think it's totally normal/fine to find some people more/less attractive because of physical features. Some guys like big butts/boobs, some like small ones, some people find black men/women more attractive, some find them less so. I have no qualms with someone finding certain races more/less physically attractive.

3) Yes there are certain races I find more physically attractive.

4) Not really? Just the people I was exposed to growing up? The attractiveness of said people? Really no idea why I find certain races more physically attractive.

5) Mind has not changed in the past 26 years, but it's definitely possible it will. However as I said, been in a relationship for 5 years now so I'm not exactly looking.

 

[manic_depressive13]

As someone who lived in Greece for the first 17 years of my life, this nuance is very pronounced, as a lot of people there are ethnically Arabs, at least in part, due to the centuries of Ottoman occupation. Be that as it may, by being culturally Greek, that entirely overwrites that ethnicity and makes them Greek. There's no such Arab-Greeks distinction like how you have here with Arab-Americans, if you're born there and speak the tongue you're just Greek. I think this system works in new ways now that we have the internet and people are free to learn about and participate with other cultures and it allows for people to bypass ethnicity entirely and get at what actually makes people get along.

Saying that Greeks don't discriminate against Arabs who speak Greek is like saying that Brits don't discriminate against Germans who speak English. I don't know very many Greeks who would be okay with their daughter marrying a black African just because he speaks Greek. If they ask him what he is and he says "Greek", be prepared for a loud and resounding "PFFFFF".

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

As someone who lived in Greece for the first 17 years of my life, this nuance is very pronounced, as a lot of people there are ethnically Arabs, at least in part, due to the centuries of Ottoman occupation. Be that as it may, by being culturally Greek, that entirely overwrites that ethnicity and makes them Greek. There's no such Arab-Greeks distinction like how you have here with Arab-Americans, if you're born there and speak the tongue you're just Greek. I think this system works in new ways now that we have the internet and people are free to learn about and participate with other cultures and it allows for people to bypass ethnicity entirely and get at what actually makes people get along.

Saying that Greeks don't discriminate against Arabs who speak Greek is like saying that Brits don't discriminate against Germans who speak English. I don't know very many Greeks who would be okay with their daughter marrying a black African just because he speaks Greek. If they ask him what he is and he says "Greek", be prepared for a loud and resounding "PFFFFF".

Arabs who speak Greek and Greeks who have Arab ancestry in their genes are two distinct groups. The former is indeed met with much negativity, nobody denies that. I was referencing the latter.

 

[manic_depressive13]

Arabs who speak Greek and Greeks who have Arab ancestry in their genes are two distinct groups. The former is indeed met with much negativity, nobody denies that. I was referencing the latter.

Oops sorry, I thought you were sating that cultural identity trumps race in Greece. My bad.

 

[Neonbob]

Do you date outside your race? If so how often?
I did, once. My first girlfriend was Filipino.

How do you view racial prefrences as whole? (in society)
I don't really think about them. I'm simple that way.

Do you find yourself attracted or not attracted to certain race or races?
I don't find many black women attractive.
They are perfectly fine as people, they just don't hit my spot.

Can you describe why you might have these prefrences/dislikes?
Nope. It's a simple disinterest.

Do you think your mind has changed about any of this from the past or is subject to change in the future?
It hasn't changed in the past, and I don't see why it would suddenly change in the future.

 

[Jux]

You can hear something like " I dont find people particularly attractive" or "I find myself more drawn to qualities in people". Now I'm not saying its racism and I'm not saying its not racism, but its an aspect of preference that seems to be uncomfortable to explaore so......lets explore it.

I'll say it then. Yea, it's racist.

 

[Programmed_For_Damage]

You can hear something like " I dont find people particularly attractive" or "I find myself more drawn to qualities in people". Now I'm not saying its racism and I'm not saying its not racism, but its an aspect of preference that seems to be uncomfortable to explaore so......lets explore it.

I'll say it then. Yea, it's racist.

I disagree. I say it's a preference. If someone asked me if I like the look and taste of bananas or nectarines and I pick bananas that doesn't make me "fruitist". I simply prefer one to the other and that's personal preference. It's neither right or wrong. If I then started disallowing members of my family eating nectarines then that is something completely different.

Every human being on this planet is biased one way or another, whether they realise it or want to admit it or not. Denying this is self-delusion.