Spoilers follow for the May 19th episode of Raw.
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I don't think I've ever seen this before. The signature "WWE: Then. Now. Forever." thing got interrupted on this episode of Raw. The Wyatt Family's logo cut in front of it, signaling a Bray Wyatt promo. That's not a bad way to kick off a show. And, well, it isn't. Bray Wyatt is one of the best promo-cutters on the show, and he delivers here. I still didn't retain a whole lot of it, but the gist that I gathered was that he admitted to being evil and also he's going to beat John Cena at Payback. Sure he will.
Cena sneaks up on Bray and delivers an Attitude Adjustment, and then runs away from Harper and Rowan. What a true babyface. Sneaking up on someone and then running away from that person's family. Our hero man! Hopefully we're hinting at a Cena heel turn, but that's about as likely as Brock Lesnar conquering The Undertaker's undefeated streak at WrestleMania. Wait a second...
Speaking of that streak, Paul Heyman and Cesaro are out after the commercial break. You know exactly what he's going to say. Anyone else just want Brock Lesnar back so we can stop hearing about The Streak? I know I do. Anyway, Heyman comes out to cut a promo, taunting the fans who are going along with him. Cesaro is going to face the new United States champion, Sheamus, who, let me remind you, is still a face. The Londoners boo him anyway.
Cesaro (with Paul Heyman) vs. Sheamus
Does it seem to anyone else like Sheamus was given the United States Championship just so that it'll look more impressive when someone like Cesaro inevitably takes it from him? Maybe it's just me, but he comes across as more of a placeholder than anything else.
Anyway, if he and Cesaro are going to feud for any length of time, we're going to get some pretty solid matches. Or, we will if their match here is to be believed. The two have great chemistry and know how to work well with one another's style. They deliver a physical match here, working primarily as brawlers. That's what Sheamus primarily is, and Cesaro can work well with that. Not a whole lot of pinfalls, but the match made both opponents look strong and incredibly tough. Cesaro gets the win with his German suplex pin, which is a weak finisher.
Match Rating: ***
After the match, Sheamus tries to shake Cesaro's hand. That isn't going to happen. This is why I wager we might see a feud between them.
<color=Red>Beat the Clock Match: Big E vs. Ryback
Apparently we're doing a Beat the Clock challenge in order to determine who will face Bad News Barrett for the Intercontinental Championship at Payback. Because ... WWE can't figure out how to write a story for anyone holding the championship, I guess. The way that the Beat the Clock challenge works is that a series of matches occur, and you want to have the fastest pinfall out of all of the matches. So, you get purposefully rushed matches that are often pretty poor.
Big E and Ryback are both large and explosive but not terribly good in the ring. Ryback works well in a tag team because some of his deficiencies can be hidden. Big E probably would, too. To be fair, the two aren't terrible here, in large part because they seem to ignore the whole "beat the clock" thing. They set a slow at just over 5 minutes, with Big E picking up the victory in a couple of moves after Ryback dominates the majority of the match.
Match Rating: **1/2
R-Truth and a Funkadactyl (Naomi or Cameron) vs. Fandango and Layla
The match doesn't happen. Before the match, Summer Rae comes out, kisses Fandango, and then she and Layla have a bit of a catfight. End segment. Time for Layla and Summer Rae to feud.
Match Rating: N/A
After the commercial, Daniel Bryan's music hits. But, it's a fake out. Stephanie McMahon comes out, trolling every step of the way, doing the "Yes!" motion as she goes. Bryan's neck surgery was a success, she reminds us. She puts over Bryan but also asserts that we need an active WWE champion. She has some bad news. The WWE Championship is being stripped. Or, more correctly, she's going to demand that it be relinquished next week on Raw. Daniel Bran should "do the right thing." So, tune in, I guess.
Heath Slater (with 3MB) vs. Rusev (with Lana)
The Union Jacks are back! Perhaps that's why Hornswoggle wasn't there. Rusev beats them up outside the ring before squashing Slater in a couple of moves after the bell rings. Yawn.
Match Rating: *
The Shield then cuts a promo about how tough they are. Because they're tough. Really tough. And ... stuff. Believe in The Shield!
<color=Red>Beat the Clock Match: Alberto Del Rio vs. Rob Van Dam
Why would people use a rest hold in a Beat the Clock match? It just doesn't make sense. The match consisted of a lot of pinfalls and big hits, which is what it should have, but I can't understand the rest holds. These time-restrained matches just can't be that good. The Superstars are too restricted by the limit. And when they do things that waste time, it becomes silly.
Match Rating: **
Renee Young, John Cena, and The Usos cut a silly and stupid promo backstage. They do Matthew McConaughey's chest-beating thing (a stock market reference). That's all I have.
Seth Rollins vs. Batista
All non-official ringside members have been banned. As a result, Triple H and Randy Orton are "special" ringside members. One is a timekeeper, one is a ring announcer. Evolution has circumvented the "rules." Shocking. Seth Rollins then announces that Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns -- the other two members of The Shield -- are special guest commentators. This is getting silly.
Fortunately, Batista and Rollins learned from their match on Smackdown a couple of weeks back. During that match, the clashing styles didn't seem conducive to a strong performance, but here they take it to a new level. This is a great free TV match, and contains spots from the two of them that you rarely see. It's a shame that it ends with a DQ thanks to Triple H, and then descends into a brawl. We've seen that type of brawl so often recently that, despite being filled with some great moments, it no longer feels particularly special. Still, it's the best story WWE has going right now, and I'll take matches like this any day.
Match Rating: ***1/2
Alicia Fox vs. Paige
Alicia Fox is on a Titus O'Neil style of push, which means she's aggressive and mad but doesn't really get to win a whole lot. Yes, I know it's been a week. But that's what it's looking like. And Paige is in her home country, so there's no way that Paige would suffer her first Raw loss, right? Right?
Wrong. Alicia Fox wins with a kick. A kick! Apparently Paige hit a Paige Turner -- an OHKO move every other time she's hit it -- but it looked more like a neckbreaker from Fox. Why book that move so strongly early on, only to cheapen it during an unimportant match? Fox dominated the majority of the match and unlike almost every other Paige match, Paige was unable to make a comeback. Fox picks up the victory, and becomes more successful than Titus O'Neil in the process, despite both getting an "I'm aggressive now" push. Oh, Christian also did that but then he got concussed. I forgot about him.
Match Rating: **1/2
<color=Red>Beat the Clock Match: Mark Henry vs. Dolph Ziggler
The time to beat is 4:15. So close to 4:20. Ha. Ha! Ha ha. Get it? Because it's Rob Van Dam? Anyway, you can believe that Mark Henry could beat up Ziggler in under that time, but the opposite might not be as plausible. Henry dominates the early part of the match, but Ziggler takes momentum midway through. By that, I mean he hits a couple of moves. It's a boring match. The men take far too much time to do anything. Lots of downtime in a time limit match. Dull. Ziggler would have won, but he hit his finisher with not enough time left.
Match Rating: *1/2
Rob Van Dam comes out to celebrate after the match, but is jumped by Bad News Barrett. Barrett then cuts a promo. You weren't going to keep him from appearing in his home country.
Renee Young is in the ring after commercial, and she's going to talk to Aldous Snow. Er, sorry, I meant Adam Rose. I made a clever movie comparison. Applaud me!
The London crowd seemed incredibly into Rose's theme, even starting it up during the interview. Rose claims that he wants Jack Swagger and Zeb Colter to have more fun. The bunny then starts dancing. I'm not sure I'm sold on Rose yet. We'll need to see him in the ring first. Swagger and Colter come out to interrupt and be the heels they are. Colter challenges Rose to a fight. Swagger gets a cheap shot. Rose soon knocks Swagger out of the ring. I hope they have a good match at Payback; their feud so far has been unimpressive. It's good to see Rose getting over with the London crowd.
John Cena (with The Usos) vs. Luke Harper (with Bray Wyatt and Erick Rowan)
When John Cena was fighting individual Wyatt Family members leading up WrestleMania, the match against Luke Harper was the best of them. Harper pulled out all the stops against Cena, and the match was quite entertaining. This one starts off slow but winds up becoming very similar to the last time these two had a singles match. Seeing Harper pull off a hurricanrana and a dive through the ropes to the outside is enjoyable. Big spots fill the second half of this match. There are certainly worse people to main event Raw.
It turns into more of a brawl at the end. It looks for a while like there won't be any disqualifications, but after Cena hits the AA, the Wyatt Family ambushes and begins to beat him up. A bit of a disappointing ending to an otherwise very solid match.
Match Rating: ***1/2
After the match, the crowd begins to sing "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands." The Wyatt Family continues to beat Cena all the way to the stage (including a fallaway slam onto the ramp). The Wyatt Family looks the strongest it has in weeks. That's not saying a lot. This feud needs to end at Payback. Raw goes off the air with Bray singing his song and Luke Harper counting to 10, because of that Last Man Standing match at Payback.
The Good: Stephanie McMahon. Batista vs. Rollins. Cena vs. Harper. Opening Wyatt promo.
The Bad: The Beat the Clock challenge. Brawls leading to unsatisfactory match conclusions.
Match of the Night: Batista vs. Seth Rollins.
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http://i55.servimg.com/u/f55/16/09/70/40/raw_lo10.png
I don't think I've ever seen this before. The signature "WWE: Then. Now. Forever." thing got interrupted on this episode of Raw. The Wyatt Family's logo cut in front of it, signaling a Bray Wyatt promo. That's not a bad way to kick off a show. And, well, it isn't. Bray Wyatt is one of the best promo-cutters on the show, and he delivers here. I still didn't retain a whole lot of it, but the gist that I gathered was that he admitted to being evil and also he's going to beat John Cena at Payback. Sure he will.
Cena sneaks up on Bray and delivers an Attitude Adjustment, and then runs away from Harper and Rowan. What a true babyface. Sneaking up on someone and then running away from that person's family. Our hero man! Hopefully we're hinting at a Cena heel turn, but that's about as likely as Brock Lesnar conquering The Undertaker's undefeated streak at WrestleMania. Wait a second...
Speaking of that streak, Paul Heyman and Cesaro are out after the commercial break. You know exactly what he's going to say. Anyone else just want Brock Lesnar back so we can stop hearing about The Streak? I know I do. Anyway, Heyman comes out to cut a promo, taunting the fans who are going along with him. Cesaro is going to face the new United States champion, Sheamus, who, let me remind you, is still a face. The Londoners boo him anyway.
Cesaro (with Paul Heyman) vs. Sheamus
Does it seem to anyone else like Sheamus was given the United States Championship just so that it'll look more impressive when someone like Cesaro inevitably takes it from him? Maybe it's just me, but he comes across as more of a placeholder than anything else.
Anyway, if he and Cesaro are going to feud for any length of time, we're going to get some pretty solid matches. Or, we will if their match here is to be believed. The two have great chemistry and know how to work well with one another's style. They deliver a physical match here, working primarily as brawlers. That's what Sheamus primarily is, and Cesaro can work well with that. Not a whole lot of pinfalls, but the match made both opponents look strong and incredibly tough. Cesaro gets the win with his German suplex pin, which is a weak finisher.
Match Rating: ***
After the match, Sheamus tries to shake Cesaro's hand. That isn't going to happen. This is why I wager we might see a feud between them.
<color=Red>Beat the Clock Match: Big E vs. Ryback
Apparently we're doing a Beat the Clock challenge in order to determine who will face Bad News Barrett for the Intercontinental Championship at Payback. Because ... WWE can't figure out how to write a story for anyone holding the championship, I guess. The way that the Beat the Clock challenge works is that a series of matches occur, and you want to have the fastest pinfall out of all of the matches. So, you get purposefully rushed matches that are often pretty poor.
Big E and Ryback are both large and explosive but not terribly good in the ring. Ryback works well in a tag team because some of his deficiencies can be hidden. Big E probably would, too. To be fair, the two aren't terrible here, in large part because they seem to ignore the whole "beat the clock" thing. They set a slow at just over 5 minutes, with Big E picking up the victory in a couple of moves after Ryback dominates the majority of the match.
Match Rating: **1/2
R-Truth and a Funkadactyl (Naomi or Cameron) vs. Fandango and Layla
The match doesn't happen. Before the match, Summer Rae comes out, kisses Fandango, and then she and Layla have a bit of a catfight. End segment. Time for Layla and Summer Rae to feud.
Match Rating: N/A
After the commercial, Daniel Bryan's music hits. But, it's a fake out. Stephanie McMahon comes out, trolling every step of the way, doing the "Yes!" motion as she goes. Bryan's neck surgery was a success, she reminds us. She puts over Bryan but also asserts that we need an active WWE champion. She has some bad news. The WWE Championship is being stripped. Or, more correctly, she's going to demand that it be relinquished next week on Raw. Daniel Bran should "do the right thing." So, tune in, I guess.
Heath Slater (with 3MB) vs. Rusev (with Lana)
The Union Jacks are back! Perhaps that's why Hornswoggle wasn't there. Rusev beats them up outside the ring before squashing Slater in a couple of moves after the bell rings. Yawn.
Match Rating: *
The Shield then cuts a promo about how tough they are. Because they're tough. Really tough. And ... stuff. Believe in The Shield!
<color=Red>Beat the Clock Match: Alberto Del Rio vs. Rob Van Dam
Why would people use a rest hold in a Beat the Clock match? It just doesn't make sense. The match consisted of a lot of pinfalls and big hits, which is what it should have, but I can't understand the rest holds. These time-restrained matches just can't be that good. The Superstars are too restricted by the limit. And when they do things that waste time, it becomes silly.
Match Rating: **
Renee Young, John Cena, and The Usos cut a silly and stupid promo backstage. They do Matthew McConaughey's chest-beating thing (a stock market reference). That's all I have.
Seth Rollins vs. Batista
All non-official ringside members have been banned. As a result, Triple H and Randy Orton are "special" ringside members. One is a timekeeper, one is a ring announcer. Evolution has circumvented the "rules." Shocking. Seth Rollins then announces that Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns -- the other two members of The Shield -- are special guest commentators. This is getting silly.
Fortunately, Batista and Rollins learned from their match on Smackdown a couple of weeks back. During that match, the clashing styles didn't seem conducive to a strong performance, but here they take it to a new level. This is a great free TV match, and contains spots from the two of them that you rarely see. It's a shame that it ends with a DQ thanks to Triple H, and then descends into a brawl. We've seen that type of brawl so often recently that, despite being filled with some great moments, it no longer feels particularly special. Still, it's the best story WWE has going right now, and I'll take matches like this any day.
Match Rating: ***1/2
Alicia Fox vs. Paige
Alicia Fox is on a Titus O'Neil style of push, which means she's aggressive and mad but doesn't really get to win a whole lot. Yes, I know it's been a week. But that's what it's looking like. And Paige is in her home country, so there's no way that Paige would suffer her first Raw loss, right? Right?
Wrong. Alicia Fox wins with a kick. A kick! Apparently Paige hit a Paige Turner -- an OHKO move every other time she's hit it -- but it looked more like a neckbreaker from Fox. Why book that move so strongly early on, only to cheapen it during an unimportant match? Fox dominated the majority of the match and unlike almost every other Paige match, Paige was unable to make a comeback. Fox picks up the victory, and becomes more successful than Titus O'Neil in the process, despite both getting an "I'm aggressive now" push. Oh, Christian also did that but then he got concussed. I forgot about him.
Match Rating: **1/2
<color=Red>Beat the Clock Match: Mark Henry vs. Dolph Ziggler
The time to beat is 4:15. So close to 4:20. Ha. Ha! Ha ha. Get it? Because it's Rob Van Dam? Anyway, you can believe that Mark Henry could beat up Ziggler in under that time, but the opposite might not be as plausible. Henry dominates the early part of the match, but Ziggler takes momentum midway through. By that, I mean he hits a couple of moves. It's a boring match. The men take far too much time to do anything. Lots of downtime in a time limit match. Dull. Ziggler would have won, but he hit his finisher with not enough time left.
Match Rating: *1/2
Rob Van Dam comes out to celebrate after the match, but is jumped by Bad News Barrett. Barrett then cuts a promo. You weren't going to keep him from appearing in his home country.
Renee Young is in the ring after commercial, and she's going to talk to Aldous Snow. Er, sorry, I meant Adam Rose. I made a clever movie comparison. Applaud me!
The London crowd seemed incredibly into Rose's theme, even starting it up during the interview. Rose claims that he wants Jack Swagger and Zeb Colter to have more fun. The bunny then starts dancing. I'm not sure I'm sold on Rose yet. We'll need to see him in the ring first. Swagger and Colter come out to interrupt and be the heels they are. Colter challenges Rose to a fight. Swagger gets a cheap shot. Rose soon knocks Swagger out of the ring. I hope they have a good match at Payback; their feud so far has been unimpressive. It's good to see Rose getting over with the London crowd.
John Cena (with The Usos) vs. Luke Harper (with Bray Wyatt and Erick Rowan)
When John Cena was fighting individual Wyatt Family members leading up WrestleMania, the match against Luke Harper was the best of them. Harper pulled out all the stops against Cena, and the match was quite entertaining. This one starts off slow but winds up becoming very similar to the last time these two had a singles match. Seeing Harper pull off a hurricanrana and a dive through the ropes to the outside is enjoyable. Big spots fill the second half of this match. There are certainly worse people to main event Raw.
It turns into more of a brawl at the end. It looks for a while like there won't be any disqualifications, but after Cena hits the AA, the Wyatt Family ambushes and begins to beat him up. A bit of a disappointing ending to an otherwise very solid match.
Match Rating: ***1/2
After the match, the crowd begins to sing "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands." The Wyatt Family continues to beat Cena all the way to the stage (including a fallaway slam onto the ramp). The Wyatt Family looks the strongest it has in weeks. That's not saying a lot. This feud needs to end at Payback. Raw goes off the air with Bray singing his song and Luke Harper counting to 10, because of that Last Man Standing match at Payback.
The Good: Stephanie McMahon. Batista vs. Rollins. Cena vs. Harper. Opening Wyatt promo.
The Bad: The Beat the Clock challenge. Brawls leading to unsatisfactory match conclusions.
Match of the Night: Batista vs. Seth Rollins.
<color=D6D9DA>_________________________________________________________________________________
If you wish to be notified whenever I post something new, please join this <url=http://www.escapistmagazine.com/groups/view/2-50-Reviews>user group.
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