Ready... Set!... TEACH!

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Jewrean

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Jun 27, 2010
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Hypothetical Question #43: (Skip the prose for the question)
You end the night like any other, gazing into the computer screen. You head on over to the Escapist hoping for some comedy, some fulfillment, and intellectual stimuli. Unfortunately none is to be had this night. You head to your bed and rest on the fluffy pillow that you prefer because it has the perfect amount of stuffing for your neck.


Everything is dark, you smell something moldy and old... suddenly a hand wrenches the bag that had been covering your head. Your head is pounding, probably because you were drugged or possibly bludgeoned. You look around the room and see a well dressed elderly man sitting in a rather extravagant chair, a throne even. He introduces himself and explains that he has brought you here for entertainment. Your eyes wander the rest of the room and spot a number of heavily armed guards with M16s trained on you.



The Question!
He explains that he will pay you an exuberant amount of money if you teach him about something. Anything! It's your choice as to what you teach him. However, he continues by adding the following rules:

1) It must be a topic that you know a lot about.
2) The information must be legitimate, what you say is checked by intelligence officers observing from another room.
3) It cannot be something the man already knows. Unfortunately you know nothing about this man or his interests and he refuses to tell you. Therefore you should probably talk about a topic that not many people know about.
4) Failure to comply with these rules will result in your immediate execution.


As for me?
I am a Mathematics / Science / Information Technology secondary school teacher. I would probably lean towards IT because the Elderly aren't really well versed with technology in general. However, if I wanted to throw a curve ball I might start talking about a Synchrotron or some fundamentals of Quantum Physics.
 

Broady Brio

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Jun 28, 2009
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How Ronald Reagan destroyed the USSR, by simply putting slightly more resources into arms and the USSR wanted to do the same and ended starving everyone and getting kicked out for doing so.
 

Toriver

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Jan 25, 2010
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I would probably either go with the basics of the Spanish or Japanese language. I could go into much more depth with Spanish, but Japanese is much fresher in my mind and it would be far less likely he already knows the language. Either that, or having majored in international politics, I would go into the prevailing theories behind it. Though also from having majored in it, I also realized that I learned nothing in my four years of study that it seems everyone and their dog doesn't already know lately (and I have little to no chance of the degree being any use to me in getting a job either...) Fine waste of four years and almost $100,000 that was.
 

lolelemental

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Oct 2, 2009
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Music! I'd teach him all about how to be a successful and energetic heavy metal frontman!

Seriously, how friken awesum would it be to see an old man act like Angus Young or do acrobatics!
 

Guffe

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Jul 12, 2009
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I'd start telling about my hometown, I know some history and the current situation and no one knows bout this small town so if he'd be from here by any random chance I'd recognize him and then start talking about Pokémon ^^
 

Jewrean

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Jun 27, 2010
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lolelemental said:
Seriously, how friken awesum would it be to see an old man act like Angus Young or do acrobatics!

Christopher Lee metaling it up. Although no Acrobatics as far as I know.
 
Mar 9, 2010
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I'd teach the man some maths. Maybe a bit about the golden ratio and the sigma notation. There's no punishment for teaching him something he knows.
 

Danzaivar

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I'd tell him I would have come if he just offered me money rather than drugging me and dragging me to his evil lair THEN offering money.

Then with my dying breath as his guards gun me down, I'd call him a pillock. Because he probably doesn't know that word. And he feels bad for killing me as he learns something.

- - - -

The Unworthy Gentleman said:
There's no punishment for teaching him something he knows.
*cough*

Jewrean said:
3) It cannot be something the man already knows. Unfortunately you know nothing about this man or his interests and he refuses to tell you. Therefore you should probably talk about a topic that not many people know about.
4) Failure to comply with these rules will result in your immediate execution.
You'd break rule 3, so he applies rule 4. :p
 

Jewrean

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The Unworthy Gentleman said:
There's no punishment for teaching him something he knows.
Is this a typo? Yes... yes there is. If he already knows about it in detail then you are to be executed. *Gasp!*

But chances are (unless he is a Scientist / Mathematician / etc) he wouldn't know much about the Golden Ratio. I'm going to assume you bring that up based on the Escapist 5 day quiz? ;D
 
Mar 9, 2010
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Jewrean said:
The Unworthy Gentleman said:
There's no punishment for teaching him something he knows.
Is this a typo? Yes... yes there is. If he already knows about it in detail then you are to be executed. *Gasp!*

But chances are (unless he is a Scientist / Mathematician / etc) he wouldn't know much about the Golden Ratio. I'm going to assume you bring that up based on the Escapist 5 day quiz? ;D
Oh, I missed that last bit. No, actually, it was because of the 'Elites of Minecraft: The Architect' thread on the Minecraft forums. I just learnt about it the other day and it's still fresh in my mind. Same with the sigma notation. It's something simple, but it's there in my mind.