(really late) reveiw spore

[insane44]

i got my computer booted up by kicking it it wouldnt come on sold it on the other computer got a new gaming computer and now i decide to play spore. and well lets just say if you were planning to have any choice in your diet or playstyle you werewrong , heprovbina, falsch, incorecto,mal, incorrect in fact if you arnt a predator you will become a giant mooses dinner and it will have a side of your family! its all for non though youll just hatch somewere else.
you heard wright the different stages are pretty short but this probably on purpose because in the stages you learn your lefts from rights and all your maths for the tough bully of the schoolyard space the 20 hour epic stage which has one ending a sims game with one linear ending seems like ad vertising choice and your choices are being raped then eaten in prison or pies but then again i clocked the whole 20 hour space stage in one session so i have to say I have mixed feelings

 

[wilsonscrazybed]

You could use some capitalization man.

 

[Calobi]

That was...a read? Please check you grammar spelling; and also edit this to be a real review. You know, with game play sited or at least talked about a little in depth.

Just trying to say this before everyone starts spamming you with "That sucked" and things to that effect.

Edit: And too late.

 

[Mariena]

I know I can sometimes be baffled by the lack of coherent posting, walls of text and no punctuation in a post written by a native speaker of the English language.. but wow.

I'm sorry, but .. according to your profile you're American and born in 1980. That means you are now approximately 28 years old.

 

[NewClassic_v1legacy]

I got my computer booted up by kicking it, but it wouldn't come on. So I sold it on the my other computer, got a new gaming computer, and now I decided to play Spore. and Well, let's just say if you were planning to have any choice in your diet or play style, you were wrong. Heprovbina, falsch, incorecto, mal, incorrect. In fact if you aren't a predator, you will become a giant moose's dinner, and it will have a side of your family! It's all for nothing, though, because you'll just hatch somewhere else.

You heard wright the different stages are pretty short, but this probably on purpose because in these stages; you learn your lefts from rights and all your maths for to become the tough bully of the schoolyard. Space, the 20 hour epic stage which has one ending, a Sim game with one linear ending seems like advertising choice and with your choices are being "Raped then eaten in prison" or "Pies," but then again I clocked the whole 20 hour space stage in one session, so I have to say I have mixed feelings.

Two paragraphs, one review, half of an effort, for a quarter of what I was expecting, without even an eighth of the quality needed.

You paragraphs were short, completely haphazard, and held no coherence. Where I could adjust your grammar, I found the end result being the polar opposite of the initial response. As a review, this fails because it describes next to nothing about the gameplay experience while simultaniously failing to even convey the message it should.

As a rant, it's even too incoherent to draw detail from. If your profile is to be believed, you're eight years my senior, so I'm going to say this as respectfully as possible. Your review is worse than awful. Your grammar and structure resemble something of a rambling fanboy or an incoherent drunk, while your dedication to length and description is slightly less dedicated than a decade-old server hosted on a 56k line.

To say this review needs work would be an understatement. This review needs content. Once it has content, it needs revision. Once it's had several revisions, it needs an editor. Once it's been edited to high-heaven, it then needs dedication. Reviewing isn't a simple throw-away activity, it needs some semblance of focus.

This shows me none of the above. So, I'm sorry to say that it needs to be completely torn apart, replacing the foundation, and done again.

 

[SimuLord]

You write like someone half your age. More to the point, you write like a 14-year-old Special Ed kid.

Please, please, PLEASE, for the sake of the Great Amateur Reviewer Team Here (GARTH---think it'll catch on as an all-purpose group identifier?), learn to write in complete, grammatically correct sentences and paragraphs with a distinct beginning, middle, and end.

 

[Pigeon_Grenade]

i believe your review could be longer and Explain more about the game, good start though

 

[SimuLord]

i believe your review could be longer and Explain more about the game, good start though

Somehow I pictured you saying that as you picked up the fat Down's Syndrome kid who just faceplanted on the first step of the 100-meter dash at the Special Olympics. "You'll make it next time! You're special!"

 

[Pigeon_Grenade]

i believe your review could be longer and Explain more about the game, good start though

Somehow I pictured you saying that as you picked up the fat Down's Syndrome kid who just faceplanted on the first step of the 100-meter dash at the Special Olympics. "You'll make it next time! You're special!"

i believe that with work he can do it better, i suspect he was just Excited by his first Review and rushed it, and a slight push in the right direction will let him do better next time

 

[SimuLord]

i believe your review could be longer and Explain more about the game, good start though

Somehow I pictured you saying that as you picked up the fat Down's Syndrome kid who just faceplanted on the first step of the 100-meter dash at the Special Olympics. "You'll make it next time! You're special!"

i believe that with work he can do it better, i suspect he was just Excited by his first Review and rushed it, and a slight push in the right direction will let him do better next time

Dude. It's a Web forum. If posting a thread to review a game gets your pulse racing, I'd suggest enlisting the services of a good psychotherapist. Or R. Lee Ermey. Either one, really.

 

[NewClassic_v1legacy]

i believe your review could be longer and Explain more about the game, good start though

Somehow I pictured you saying that as you picked up the fat Down's Syndrome kid who just faceplanted on the first step of the 100-meter dash at the Special Olympics. "You'll make it next time! You're special!"

i believe that with work he can do it better, i suspect he was just Excited by his first Review and rushed it, and a slight push in the right direction will let him do better next time

Dude. It's a Web forum. If posting a thread to review a game gets your pulse racing, I'd suggest enlisting the services of a good psychotherapist. Or R. Lee Ermey. Either one, really.

I'm going to politely disagree here, if only because it's easy to get caught up in a moment assuming you have the right setting. There are people sent into bawling tears by candy wrappers, or men jumping for joy over a candy bar. It's all about context, dude.

 

[SimuLord]

Dude. It's a Web forum. If posting a thread to review a game gets your pulse racing, I'd suggest enlisting the services of a good psychotherapist. Or R. Lee Ermey. Either one, really.

I'm going to politely disagree here, if only because it's easy to get caught up in a moment assuming you have the right setting. There are people sent into bawling tears by candy wrappers, or men jumping for joy over a candy bar. It's all about context, dude.

Clearly you've seen what happens to my wife when her mom sends down Coffee Crisp bars from Canada.

 

[RhinoTuna]

i got my computer booted up by kicking it it wouldnt come on sold it on the other computer got a new gaming computer and now i decide to play spore. and well lets just say if you were planning to have any choice in your diet or playstyle you werewrong , heprovbina, falsch, incorecto,mal, incorrect in fact if you arnt a predator you will become a giant mooses dinner and it will have a side of your family! its all for non though youll just hatch somewere else.
you heard wright the different stages are pretty short but this probably on purpose because in the stages you learn your lefts from rights and all your maths for the tough bully of the schoolyard space the 20 hour epic stage which has one ending a sims game with one linear ending seems like ad vertising choice and your choices are being raped then eaten in prison or pies but then again i clocked the whole 20 hour space stage in one session so i have to say I have mixed feelings

Translation: lol yeah played spore but preds the way to go, played it for heaps but iunno it's sorta good yeh. rape.

 

[insane44]

sorry mister adolf grammar famous grammar nazi socialist leader

 

[ImmortalItalian]

Sorry...I think my eyes just exploded trying to read that. That was worse than my block paragraph, but I even fixed it. But GOD MAN! Someone find my eyes!

On subject. I liked Spore, and didn't read your review because I didn't want my eyes to scream. But I read other people's stuff. Annnnddd, I dunno, I'm bias with Spore. BUT PLEASE EXPLAIN MORE :l I'm sitting here wondering what the hell was your point. Or if I should read everything but the last sentence or so.

 

[CrazyBerk]

Dude. It's a Web forum. If posting a thread to review a game gets your pulse racing, I'd suggest enlisting the services of a good psychotherapist. Or R. Lee Ermey. Either one, really.

You sir are awesome.

Also this review was pretty shitty. Seriously! I don't think this is even a review of sorts. Two paragraphs? C'mon. I think you need to think about lengthening your review and then maybe spell checking.
Proof read it! Please! If you haven't already noticed a lot of people on this forum are fussed with English which i can't really blame them for. It's easier on the eyes and it makes you seem less of an idiot.
If you at least spell correctly we can give you costructive criticism on the review and you won't get eighteen pages of "You spell like an infant!"

 

[D_987]

sorry mister adolf grammar famous grammar nazi socialist leader

All new users receive a message explaining the high standards these forums expect. In the Gaming Discussion or Off-topic forums, its not as bad. But you actually come in the review section (where grammar and content are essential) and complain about being told your grammar is applalling...wow...

Let me just explain how awful your review was:

. You didn't use a single capital letter
. You mis-spelt review in your title
. You frequently mis-spell or produce inappropriate references

i got my computer booted up by kicking it it wouldn't come on sold it on the other computer got a new gaming computer and now i decide to play spore.

This is needed...why? Its messy, hard to understand and just plain lackluster.

and well lets just say if you were planning to have any choice in your diet or playstyle you were wrong , heprovbina, falsch, incorecto,mal, incorrect

You didn't even check your work did you? The massive irony is the fact you try and use different words to express the fact your opinion was wrong, and mis-spell half of them.

in fact if you arn't a predator you will become a giant mooses dinner and it will have a side of your family! its all for non though youll just hatch somewere else.

This is hard to understand and, as someone who has not played Spore, irrelevant - I don't care about this - I care about the actual gameplay, the graphics - What do you even do?

you heard wright

Is this an ingenious reference to Will Wright...(No)

different stages are pretty short but this probably on purpose because in the stages you learn your lefts from rights and all your maths for the tough bully of the schoolyard space the 20 hour epic stage which has one ending a sims game with one linear ending seems like ad vertising choice and your choices are being raped then eaten in prison or pies but then again i clocked the whole 20 hour space stage in one session so i have to say I have mixed feelings

. No full-stops, or capital letters
. I have NO idea what you are trying to say - You didn't mention there were stages until now.
. "You choices are being eaten in prison or pies" - WHAT?!


In short, this is the second worst review I have ever seen (possibly the worst).

This is disgraceful - please read other reviews and understand this is a high standard of game journalism. This is not Gamespot or IGN - where user reviews are not read or commented on. This is The Escapist, one of the more intelligent communities I have found on the web (well, most of the time).

Please observe instead of throwing out random references to Nazis.