Relationship problems/Depression

[Tyrant T100]

Hello Escapist, I'm sure you've seen lots of threads like this before but I'm not here primarily to ask for advice if that's ok, but to explain what's happened but just so I can share my problems and maybe get some helpful advice.

Firstly I've never had much luck with the ladies, lots of girls have said I'm attractive and that I have a great personality but I used to go after the wrong girls and get nowhere. However recently a friend thought it would be a good idea for me to put some photos on my facebook when I was working out due to it being attractive to girls ect.

I uploaded the photos and my friends and people I knew where astonished my biceps weren't shooped as they never imaged me being incredibly strong ect.

Anyway I was then contacted by a girl I knew a little but not brilliantly and we talked on Facebook for a while and then met up a few times ect.
We got on really well and we both developed an interest in each other and we were both single so as things were going really well I asked her out.

She broke down and told me that she had a boyfriend and she didn't tell me about him as she didn't want to hurt my feelings, she started blaming herself and said she felt like shit for lying to me, I told her I understood and went off and broke down while being comforted by my friends.

So my real question is why does this sort of stuff seem to happen, I can't really understand why girls (I'm sure men do it as well) seem to do this whole hitting on you thing even when they're in a relationship.

Anyway thanks for reading as it felt good to explain it fully, if you want to ask anything you can do it.

 

[steve.wough]

This sort of stuff happens. Not only to you, but for everybody.

Life is a game of trial and error. Espacially girls. You need 'mastery' to be successful with girls. I guess you are average in this ( I am also average).

Try and learn. Thats the way.

 

[PleaseDele]

We do it because we are human. Flirting and everything else in the love game release a shitload of natural highs inside our body. And if there's anything w elove, it's natural highs.

Also, you are looking for a succes story. And with succes you always have to remember to aspects: Luck and Effort.

Your friends helped you in the effort department and as stated above it's trial and error. You can put in the effort you want but do it wrong and you still don't get succes.

As for the luck part... I couldn't help you. You just gotta hang in there! She's out there.

 

[Tyrant T100]

We do it because we are human. Flirting and everything else in the love game release a shitload of natural highs inside our body. And if there's anything w elove, it's natural highs.

Also, you are looking for a succes story. And with succes you always have to remember to aspects: Luck and Effort.

Your friends helped you in the effort department and as stated above it's trial and error. You can put in the effort you want but do it wrong and you still don't get succes.

As for the luck part... I couldn't help you. You just gotta hang in there! She's out there.

Thanks, I appreciate it.

 

[PleaseDele]

No sweat. I've been walking around with the same mood for some years in the past. I know it can be tough. Never ran into something like this though :S

 

[Mopbucket]

Don't worry yourself so much brother. You didn't really have anything invested in this girl, right? A couple Facebook messages, and that's all. After you get a little more experience under your belt you'll stop putting so much pressure on these types of things and be able to enjoy dating a lot more.

Anyway, my advice would be to relax, cast a wide net, and enjoy the process. Try not to have grand expectations, just try to get to know the person. If you date around a lot, it won't be such a big deal if a certain girl ends up disappointing you, and you can be more selective in choosing the best one to be exclusive with.

Good luck.