Reliable Source: Guns Don?t Kill People, Violent Videogames Do

[SnipErlite]

May I quote?

"The National Rifle Association says that, "Guns don't kill people, people do," but I think the gun helps, you know? I think it helps. I just think just standing there going, "Bang!" That's not going to kill too many people, is it? You'd have to be really dodgy on the heart to have that." - Eddie Izzard

Also that was a great Reliable Source, the cleetus/banjo line cracked me up.

 

[addeB]

Huh, are these stories real? Some of the things that happens seems to strange xD
Also i would recommend to bobby trap your door.

 

[Onyx Oblivion]

I'll make my next stop a Gamestop (TM), too!

Didn't you say you were on your way to cure your game addiction?

And I am. I'm not giving up games. Just mostly the FPS genre. And all multiplayer games. Even TF2.

 

[YouCallMeNighthawk]

technically, guns nor video games kill people, people that have guns and possibly have been drinking kill people.


beyond that, why not just set up a bear trap outside your door, next to it put a sign saying "bear trap is to keep bear inside apartment only!", that would screw with some would be thieves!

I'm sure the gun helps .... alot lol

OT: I haven't had my xbox stolen before, wish someone would though it doesn't work all that well lol

 

[Marion Cox]

Your articles have gotten so fun to read that it looks like your editors don't even check them for typos anymore

That's because Tito is busy on his own manuscript, that focuses on the mental anguish and moral dilemmas of a cute penguin lost in New York, a decrepit tabby who formulate and executes a plan to kill a hated, unscrupulous band of pigeons who are hoarding all the food in their alley, thereby controlling the precious bread crumb supply near the hotdog stands.

 

[addeB]

Your articles have gotten so fun to read that it looks like your editors don't even check them for typos anymore

That's because Tito is busy on his own manuscript, that focuses on the mental anguish and moral dilemmas of a cute penguin lost in New York, a decrepit tabby who formulate and executes a plan to kill a hated, unscrupulous band of pigeons who are hoarding all the food in their alley, thereby controlling the precious bread crumb supply near the hotdog stands.

Awwh you shouldn't have posted that, now the guys from pixar will steal Tito's idea... I guess now we know what the next from Disney will be.

 

[kotorfan04]

Oh I am so glad RS is back. I was worried after you didn't show last week. Good way to start a day, and now I am thinking of Eddie Izzard.

 

[Triggerhappy938]

This story brings back memories. The eternal struggle between personal security and arming mad family members.

 

[geek.flip]

I love your humor. It is the thick, delicious pudding-icing on a sliver of the crap that life piles on you. I probably don't want to know how much of your tales are factual, because if it is more than ~5% that's just depressing...

Also, you make me even more grateful that I took a promotion to Marion out of Springfield at my earliest convenience. Amusingly enough, the community college down there offers classes on defensive shooting. I need to take one...

PSA: Guns are only good home defense if you A) are trained in their use and B) are there to use them. They really should be locked in a safe or otherwise secured when no one is home, because they are obviously valuable, and can also be stolen to be used in the commission of crimes. There is a reason why my longarms are both cheap and disassembled. In your case, might I suggest a Tee-Ball bat? ~$10 at Wal-Mart, and much less risk for collateral damage/will hurt you less if it is taken from you

 

[Wintermoot]

games dont kill people crazy fathers do

 

[Jared]

AK-47...for all your defense needs lol

 

[dududf]

technically, guns nor video games kill people, people that have guns and possibly have been drinking kill people.


beyond that, why not just set up a bear trap outside your door, next to it put a sign saying "bear trap is to keep bear inside apartment only!", that would screw with some would be thieves!

I'm gonna quibble on this and say it's actually bullets that kill people, not guns or people with guns.

And I'm gonna quibble on this, unless the bullets hit the head, bullets don't kill people. (it's just an assisted natural death, them bleeding out and such)

[sub][sub]This is a joke.[/sub][/sub]

 

[FloodOne]

You used to write entertaining articles for this website, but lately all you do is air out your dirty laundry with a thinly veiled connection to gaming.

I think I'll refrain from clicking your links from now on.

 

[Woodsey]

Hilarious yet again - I missed it last week!