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Eh, what the hell. I'll comment on this. Partly out of sympathy for your plight, partly out of thanks for linking my (three-month old) review in here (which, going back to reread, is incredibly choppy...). So: what the hey. Comment ahoy!
My thoughts tend to gel with your thoughts on this "portfolio" as well as on the maker himself. I don't agree with every point, but I understand that that's due solely to personal taste.
As far as the grammar goes, it's great (assuming that English wasn't a primary language of yours), but does stand to use some improvement. The only thing that really jumps out at me is the missing apostrophes when you use the possessive case (i.e., "Cleril's Efforts"), but other than that the writing's pretty good. Another proofread probably would have been good, though, as you misspelled "deaths" once in the review (as "deats"), and you forgot to capitalize Damocles in the same sentence.
Formatting: I like the use of the inline pictures, although I feel you could've used another one to break up that wall of text in the second section. It would be nice if you also stuck with a consistent markup when referring to the creator (maybe bold, with user tags on the first instance), and then referred to the character using unmarked text. You seem to be using a mix of bold, plain, and italicized text for the former, which is a little annoying. I also think that the arbitrary scores are a little out of place, as (because of their arbitrary nature) they don't really make sense.
As a final note, the program that was used to make these games (Enterbrain's RPG Maker VX [http://download.cnet.com/Rpg-Maker-VX/3000-18541_4-10815920.html]) has a free 30-day trial, so you can always give your hand at trying to replicate and improve on these ideas at your leisure (but the $60 price tag might be a bit steep after 30 days...). Coding experience would help to make the most out of the engine and the events it can perform (as well as providing customization, but that's all done in Ruby), but prior experience isn't necessary. It helps, though.
My thoughts tend to gel with your thoughts on this "portfolio" as well as on the maker himself. I don't agree with every point, but I understand that that's due solely to personal taste.
As far as the grammar goes, it's great (assuming that English wasn't a primary language of yours), but does stand to use some improvement. The only thing that really jumps out at me is the missing apostrophes when you use the possessive case (i.e., "Cleril's Efforts"), but other than that the writing's pretty good. Another proofread probably would have been good, though, as you misspelled "deaths" once in the review (as "deats"), and you forgot to capitalize Damocles in the same sentence.
Formatting: I like the use of the inline pictures, although I feel you could've used another one to break up that wall of text in the second section. It would be nice if you also stuck with a consistent markup when referring to the creator (maybe bold, with user tags on the first instance), and then referred to the character using unmarked text. You seem to be using a mix of bold, plain, and italicized text for the former, which is a little annoying. I also think that the arbitrary scores are a little out of place, as (because of their arbitrary nature) they don't really make sense.
As a final note, the program that was used to make these games (Enterbrain's RPG Maker VX [http://download.cnet.com/Rpg-Maker-VX/3000-18541_4-10815920.html]) has a free 30-day trial, so you can always give your hand at trying to replicate and improve on these ideas at your leisure (but the $60 price tag might be a bit steep after 30 days...). Coding experience would help to make the most out of the engine and the events it can perform (as well as providing customization, but that's all done in Ruby), but prior experience isn't necessary. It helps, though.
No problem, mon.joethekoeller said:
Heh, I know the feeling. Since I'm done with the semester, I'm a bit more relaxed, but I've still haven't done anything productive. Hell, I still haven't finished FFX, which I started about a month ago.
But yeah, possessive case is tricky. Especially with words that end in "s." *shudder*
Again, no prob. The program itself is pretty straightforward to use, but it does take some getting used to. Fortunately, there are communities that focus on using this program (and its predecessors), so you could get a lot of help. Or just do what I did and faff about by yourself.
And again, no problem, mon. Now, if you excuse me, I have some paperwork to do for my interplanetary shipping company. [/lie]
I won't comment to much about the games, becuase I may or may not be fancying up my own version of this sooner or (most likely) later. Though it is funny that you reviewed them in order of how much I enjoyed them. And the comment you had about the horror genre, which hit very close to home.
As for the review aspect, Heart of Darkness covered what I wanted to say about the use of the Character's name and the creator as well as the apostrophe mishaps, especially the glaring one at the start.
The other thing that bugged me was your use of footnotes, which seems to be increasing with every review. 6,7,8 were the only ones that I found amusing/necessary, the other ones seemed very pointless or could have easily been integrated into the review. Most footnotes weren't very humorous, and when you play into effect how choppy the Escapist is when you click on them having 10 of them is annoying.
Overall I found the Haven review the best one of the bunch, and I liked the Arbitrary Score systems, those where amusing.
As for the review aspect, Heart of Darkness covered what I wanted to say about the use of the Character's name and the creator as well as the apostrophe mishaps, especially the glaring one at the start.
The other thing that bugged me was your use of footnotes, which seems to be increasing with every review. 6,7,8 were the only ones that I found amusing/necessary, the other ones seemed very pointless or could have easily been integrated into the review. Most footnotes weren't very humorous, and when you play into effect how choppy the Escapist is when you click on them having 10 of them is annoying.
Overall I found the Haven review the best one of the bunch, and I liked the Arbitrary Score systems, those where amusing.
These games look like they would be fun to give a short run, but judging by the reviews, it seems that the main thing they are lacking is some extra stages of planning in preproduction as you (Cleril) seem to be on the right track and look more than capable of making a great game, but the games need that extra polish.
EDIT: as for the review, it seemed pretty comprehensive but the footnotes shouldn't have been so far down the page.
EDIT: as for the review, it seemed pretty comprehensive but the footnotes shouldn't have been so far down the page.
I Would have to agree with the writing, It does how seem a little broken up at times, and ya I was having trouble working out the Rhyme and Reason on Peekaboo, That being said I am enjoying it but wish it had a little more interactivity too.
That doesn't pull away from the fun that much but dampens the experience some. I'm always available for ideas if Cleril needs any and id be happy to beta test also if he would like that
I Have not commented fully yet as I have to get through Haven yet
That doesn't pull away from the fun that much but dampens the experience some. I'm always available for ideas if Cleril needs any and id be happy to beta test also if he would like that
I Have not commented fully yet as I have to get through Haven yet