Requesting help with girl problems.

[80Maxwell08]

Thanks for taking the time to read this I would like to say this is the first topic I started here so sorry if it looks or sounds bad.

Now to the problem. Right now there are 2 girls that I like and I wanted to ask one of them out. The problem is I can't decide which one I like more. They are incredibly different but both of them are very nice and I can't get a clear decision. There is nothing wrong with either of their personalities so I can't even get a choice out of that.

One of them is in my food service class and we are in the same group there. We have talked a lot and I actually tried pretty hard to be friends with her because she moved here because her dad was in the military. Between her and the other girl we talk a bit more and have some more meaningful conversations. I have been trying to get to know her and when she asked "Why?" I didn't really have a direct answer and ended up apologizing where she then told me not to and that I shouldn't be so shy around her. I think she is very pretty but not as much as the other one but please don't stop reading just yet there is a reason I'm factoring that in here. Personality wise she seemed a bit shy too when she first came here but she seems better now.

Now the other girl is in my Spanish 2 class and we sit next to each other. We talk a fair amount but she has other friends she talks to so we don't talk as much as the girl in food service but I won't blame her for having friends. I knew her last year but didn't talk to her much (on account of her being on the other side of class) and last year she had a boyfriend so I didn't try anything then. Like I said earlier I think she is the better looking of the two but its to the extent of what I think of her is why I bring this up. In my eyes she is what I believe to be the most beautiful woman I have ever seen and I do not think that I will ever see anyone more beautiful for the rest of my life. Personality wise she is very social (my opposite to a good extent) and right now I know she is single because she told me she broke up with her boyfriend a while back.

Well there is my situation and I come here for help because from what I've read here this is the most mature forum I've ever seen. I don't want to ask for help but I need some advice here. I really don't want to have to factor looks into this either but because the extent of what I think about the girl in Spanish with me I can't overlook it. Any advice is appreciated and thank you for taking the time to read this.

 

[Sneaky-Pie]

Spoiler: Best advice you'll get

But seriously, I think the first one is the better option. "Meaningful conversations" is the key statement there.

Sounds like the other girl you only express interest to because of looks.

We do have a dedicated relationship guy scampering around here somewhere...

Oh, and welcome to the Escapist!

 

[Gigaguy64]

I honestly don't know man.
Iv never had a Girlfriend so im not even gonna try and give Advice.
But you might wanna check out this thread.
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.117161-Relationship-problem-thread?page=1
The guy who monitors it, BonsaiK, will probably be able to help you.

 

[Skorpyo]

The first one sounds like a much deeper proposition, but there is the threat of her moving away soon with her father in the military (Speculation, please advise further).

As for the second one, If she just got out of her last relationship, she doesn't sound like a good proposition for long-term. And if you only want to go after her looks, you have been lost.

My money is on the first.

 

[80Maxwell08]

The first one sounds like a much deeper proposition, but there is the threat of her moving away soon with her father in the military (Speculation, please advise further).

As for the second one, If she just got out of her last relationship, she doesn't sound like a good proposition for long-term. And if you only want to go after her looks, you have been lost.

My money is on the first.

Guess I didn't make this very clear but I actually like both of their personalities. I only brought up that girl's looks because of my extreme beliefs on them. Also, she left her last relationship because her boyfriend and her weren't a good match but it ended on good terms so they are still friends. Further more, the main reason I have had better talks with the girl from food service is because I'm the main person she talks to in that class while the girl in Spanish has other friends that she talks to as well. Thanks for the advice but it just doesn't give me a clear answer still. I still appreciate it though.

 

[lostzombies.com]

Very clear: The one who you like hanging out with the most.

 

[Skorpyo]

The first one sounds like a much deeper proposition, but there is the threat of her moving away soon with her father in the military (Speculation, please advise further).

As for the second one, If she just got out of her last relationship, she doesn't sound like a good proposition for long-term. And if you only want to go after her looks, you have been lost.

My money is on the first.

Guess I didn't make this very clear but I actually like both of their personalities. I only brought up that girl's looks because of my extreme beliefs on them. Also, she left her last relationship because her boyfriend and her weren't a good match but it ended on good terms so they are still friends. Further more, the main reason I have had better talks with the girl from food service is because I'm the main person she talks to in that class while the girl in Spanish has other friends that she talks to as well. Thanks for the advice but it just doesn't give me a clear answer still. I still appreciate it though.

Wow. Now that is a difficult choice...

(lucky fu...)

How about this, look into the kinds of people they mostly congregate with, what their main interests are, and see which one is most like you.

Then go for the other one. Similar people do not attract well in "Romantic" relationships.

 

[diego_2112]

Beauty shalt surely fade with the turning of the seasons, yea, just as the flower wilts in winter... Heed mine words, and harken unto them, that thou doest not make the same mistakes of mine youth! For, though looks may fade, the soul is eternal. Therefore, I beseech thee:

Dude, go with the chick you can talk to!

 

[Fuloqwam]

Wow, what an awesome problem to have. You basically have two great girls who're into you.

Who says you have to pick? Ask one out, if she says no, fall back on the other. As long as they don't talk to each other, it'll be fine.

 

[icyneesan]

J-J-JAM IT IN!
*reads original post*
Woops.... uhhh... well what ever you do, don't make a list about the things you like and dislike about them and then print it out...

Personally I'd go with the shy one, but thats just my fetish

 

[cmalberg]

Take them both on dates. There is this weird boyfriend/girlfriend thing I just don't understand. You can go out with more than one person and not be "going out" with anybody. Go on a few dates, I dunno...a movie, lunch, something like that and then go from there.

 

[TheComedown]

You mentioned you talk to both of them in class a lot, do you see them much outside of class? I cant help you pick, nor really want to. But I will say this stress less and go with your gut, if your gut don't know don't go.

 

[Infinatex]

snip

From your smaller wall of text (chest high wall of text even?) I would say number 1. It seems to me that you feel more strongly about her just from reading your post. Don't rush things and just see what happens. Good luck!

 

[NotSoNimble]

Since I personally know both girls and you, like I know the back of my hand.... I say what I tell most of my younger friends.

It's okay to ask a girl on date. It's also okay to date more than one woman. Going on a date isn't like being married, it's not a fucking big deal!

Go for a date with each and find which one you like better that way. Be open and honest, and make up your own mind. We can't do it for you. We can only judge them by the few words you think describe them.

And oh yeah: "Beauty Fades, but Dumb is Forever!

 

[dex-dex]

go out on a date with each girl and see what happens
That may narrow down your choice.

but you are the one with the power! good luck and welcome
i would have made a cake but i would not fit in the CD drive also having chocolate cake in a CD drive is kind of gross.

 

[Mimssy]

Flip a coin. Before you look at the results, which side did you want it to land on? Choose the corresponding girl.

 

[diego_2112]

Flip a coin. Before you look at the results, which side did you want it to land on? Choose the corresponding girl.

Better advice cannot be given! Go with this answer!

 

[SimuLord]

Lesson #1: Until you've got a declared relationship, you don't commit to only one girl.

Lesson #2: You decide on how to get yourself into a declared relationship by going on dates and hitting it off and eventually saying something to the effect of asking that person to date exclusively---or (far more often) it just so happens that you're always seen together, it's bloody obvious you're a romantic item, and someone's probably said "I love you" and meant it in the capital L-U-V love sort of way.

Lesson #3: Therefore, you should go on at least one date with both girls and then see what goes.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Very clear: The one who you like hanging out with the most.

This is the right answer. Which one will be the better companion/friend? I myself have encountered a girl today who may be a very interesting friend. She is single so there is a chance for something amazing to happen.

[sub][sub][sub]I'm confident enough to pursue this relationship without writing a thread about it.[/sub][/sub][/sub]

 

[unoleian]

No matter your opinion on either, keep up whatever you're doing with both and let the natural course of events happen. "Choosing" and shutting out the other may not work in your favor. Simply letting whatever friendship/relationship develops out of this on either side will be dictated solely by your reaction/response to each of them. It will occur organically. And don't follow anyone's opinion on a forum when their opinion is based on your initial opinion to begin with.

I think it's best to let this kind of stuff unfold in whatever form it's going to take. Not saying to be passive, but don't make a choice and eliminate the other. But don't play both fields, either. Keep up a rapport with both. You never know. Ms. Sociable may be sociable because she is magnetic with everyone. Ms. Reserved may be reserved because she's super into you and afraid to say the wrong things. Or, is it the other way around? Who really knows? Only you, with experience with both, can reach these conclusions.

If I'm making any sense right now. I am admittedly 5 12oz'ers deep into this particular evening...