Round Robin 2: Hidden Cat Crouching Raccoon
- Thread starter Euryalus
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Tizzy was immediately beheaded. While Sir Derpy was punched so hard in the face his head exploded.
They both woke up in a brightly lit white room. "Where are we?" Asked Tizzy. "Maybe this is heaven." Sir Derpy responded. It was at this point that hey noticed that they were both naked.
They both woke up in a brightly lit white room. "Where are we?" Asked Tizzy. "Maybe this is heaven." Sir Derpy responded. It was at this point that hey noticed that they were both naked.
The silence in the room seemed to stretch on into infinity, as SirDerpy blushed and looked at the wall very intently while Tizzy stared at him.
Sadly, the yaoi fanfic that could've been was shattered as a door materialized in the side of the room and a gigantic panda walked in.
He stopped upon seeing the two, raising an eyebrow. "Am I...interrupting something?"
Sadly, the yaoi fanfic that could've been was shattered as a door materialized in the side of the room and a gigantic panda walked in.
He stopped upon seeing the two, raising an eyebrow. "Am I...interrupting something?"
"The bastard child of who and who?" The Hobish asked with a mildly confused face.
"Ah well, it doesn't matter. Sit here and wait for the Muffin man to call you in." He chained Tizzy and Sir Derpy to a bench outside the Muffin man's office and stood next to the door watching them.
"Ah well, it doesn't matter. Sit here and wait for the Muffin man to call you in." He chained Tizzy and Sir Derpy to a bench outside the Muffin man's office and stood next to the door watching them.
It was a long and hard wait. Finally, the buzzer dinged, and the doors to the office opened.
Tizzy and SirDerpy sat down on a bench. A gigantic, tall leather chair was turned away from them on the other side of the desk, and a sinister laughing could be heard.
Then the chair swiveled around. There he was...
Tizzy and SirDerpy sat down on a bench. A gigantic, tall leather chair was turned away from them on the other side of the desk, and a sinister laughing could be heard.
Then the chair swiveled around. There he was...
*Why?* Asked the Muffin Man. *Why did you bring us here? Don't you know that we are totally going to kill you for murdering our friends?* SirDerpy asked. *And why did you say that Baccano was stupid?* Asked Tizzy.
*I brought you two here because I need to release your full potential. Because otherwise the world will be destroyed by evil aliens. That's is why I did all of that to make you angry, to make you hate me so you would get stronger. Do your tiny brains understand all of this?* the Muffin Man said.
*I brought you two here because I need to release your full potential. Because otherwise the world will be destroyed by evil aliens. That's is why I did all of that to make you angry, to make you hate me so you would get stronger. Do your tiny brains understand all of this?* the Muffin Man said.
"Oi! My brain is massive!" screamed Tizzy!
I just expected you to have a better reasoning than that! Baka!
"It's great reasoning" The muffin man shot back. "How dare you! I was going to give you weapons to help fight the aliens, but now you're on your own!"
The muffin man motioned for Tizzy and Derpy to be led outside to the front yard where the aliens had just landed...
I just expected you to have a better reasoning than that! Baka!
"It's great reasoning" The muffin man shot back. "How dare you! I was going to give you weapons to help fight the aliens, but now you're on your own!"
The muffin man motioned for Tizzy and Derpy to be led outside to the front yard where the aliens had just landed...
...In the Muffin Man's carefully arranged floral masterpiece.
"Not in my flower bed, you dribbling clods!" He shouted angrily as the liquidy aliens squirmed around on the lawn.
"Åh fan! Han skriker på oss!" One of the aliens gurgled. "Är det bra eller dåligt?"
Derpy looked at Tizzy.
"Do you understand what they're saying?" He asked.
Tizzy raised an eyebrow.
"They're aliens, smart-ass! Of course I don't!"
"Not in my flower bed, you dribbling clods!" He shouted angrily as the liquidy aliens squirmed around on the lawn.
"Åh fan! Han skriker på oss!" One of the aliens gurgled. "Är det bra eller dåligt?"
Derpy looked at Tizzy.
"Do you understand what they're saying?" He asked.
Tizzy raised an eyebrow.
"They're aliens, smart-ass! Of course I don't!"
"Can't you read the subtitles?" asked Derpy. "Ofcourse not! This is a written story not a movie! Anyway we must quickly kill the Muffin Man and Absorb his powers." Tizzy said. "But what about the aliens?" Asked Derpy. "They will wait" the Muffin Man said "Sure they go around the universe blowing up planets and enslaving the population but otherwise they are really polite."
Tizzy, Derpy and the Muffin Man stepped into the fighting cage and ripped apart the clothes covering their upper body. For a minute everyone was silent while they looked at the three mans amazingly ripped abs. And then the fight commenced.
Tizzy, Derpy and the Muffin Man stepped into the fighting cage and ripped apart the clothes covering their upper body. For a minute everyone was silent while they looked at the three mans amazingly ripped abs. And then the fight commenced.
As the three Herculean figures collided in the fighting cage like muscled planetoids, the narrator suddenly suffered a fatal and erotic heart attack. The battle descended into a bare-chested farce the likes of which would have had ancient Greek philosophers falling out of their togas. Tizzy had reach, but Derpy had flexibility and the Muffin Man had stamina. The three were evenly matched and after a mere hour of tumbling around the cage in a disorganized ball of cursing, pinching, biting and hammering, they lay sprawled and exhausted on the cage floor, their heaving chests glistening with exertion.
"You know..." mused the exhausted Muffin Man, "someone should really write an anime out of this".
"You know..." mused the exhausted Muffin Man, "someone should really write an anime out of this".
The aliens, however, were too stupid to grasp the gravity of the situation, causing them to float upwards. The entire sky filled with what looked like water blobs who were gurgling and blubbering to each other in a strange language.
"They've taken to the air!" The futuristic man shouted in a panicky voice. "They've adapted!"
Tizzy looked over att Derpy for companionship over the strange-ass situation they found themselves in...only to find him licking the chili sauce off the Muffin Man's head stump.
"I figured a Muffin Man would be filled with chocolate chips!" Derpy sniffed. "My whole life is a lie!"
"They've taken to the air!" The futuristic man shouted in a panicky voice. "They've adapted!"
Tizzy looked over att Derpy for companionship over the strange-ass situation they found themselves in...only to find him licking the chili sauce off the Muffin Man's head stump.
"I figured a Muffin Man would be filled with chocolate chips!" Derpy sniffed. "My whole life is a lie!"
"Hold on, weren't you Drumm's son in that other thread?" Tizzy interrupted once more, pointing his boneran accusatory finger at Steve. "I thought you died when-"
"GODDAMN!" Steve shouted and smacked Tizzy in the head with a small burnt cake. "This fourth wall breaking shit is ruining the pacing! Stop interrupting me, you little shit!"
He turned around to face Derpy, who were bro-hugging James Funs and patting him reassuredly on the back.
"Anyway," he continued, "I'm not dead because I set out on a quest to conquer all these stories. These stupid aliens are in my way, and so was the Muffin Man. They needed to go."
Derpy raised an eyebrow.
"Well that's all well and good," he said, " but we're almost out of pages. We agreed to about two pages per story."
He, too, got a burnt cake right between the eyes for his trouble.
"GODDAMN!" Steve shouted and smacked Tizzy in the head with a small burnt cake. "This fourth wall breaking shit is ruining the pacing! Stop interrupting me, you little shit!"
He turned around to face Derpy, who were bro-hugging James Funs and patting him reassuredly on the back.
"Anyway," he continued, "I'm not dead because I set out on a quest to conquer all these stories. These stupid aliens are in my way, and so was the Muffin Man. They needed to go."
Derpy raised an eyebrow.
"Well that's all well and good," he said, " but we're almost out of pages. We agreed to about two pages per story."
He, too, got a burnt cake right between the eyes for his trouble.
There wasn't a new post in 17 days so everyone decided to stop with the pleasantries. Everyone put on their jetpacks, loaded their plasma rifles and took to the skies to shoot some illegal alien ass!
"Whatever bitches when this is over I will have to highest k/d ratio suckers" screamed Tizzy as he flew ahead of the rest of the formation. little did he know that this was a game where you wouldn't get far without your team around.
"Whatever bitches when this is over I will have to highest k/d ratio suckers" screamed Tizzy as he flew ahead of the rest of the formation. little did he know that this was a game where you wouldn't get far without your team around.
"Comrade, I have the object in my sights!" Tube pressed to his shoulder, Lev listened for the continuous tone.
"He's going at some speed, but not enough." He heard the tone and depressed the trigger. With a puff of smoke, the rocket jettisoned from the end of the launcher, hanging for a fraction of a second before its engines kicked in and it lanced screaming toward its target, arcing in the azure sky.
"Poor bastard," said Gorsky.
"He's going at some speed, but not enough." He heard the tone and depressed the trigger. With a puff of smoke, the rocket jettisoned from the end of the launcher, hanging for a fraction of a second before its engines kicked in and it lanced screaming toward its target, arcing in the azure sky.
"Poor bastard," said Gorsky.