Shyamalan's New Movie

[Rylot]

Was derping around youtube this morning and came across an ad for a really terrible looking movie, and of course it's Shyamalan.
There's just noting in the trailer that makes this look like an even decent movie. I honestly thought that this was a comedy at first with the horrible dialog and really stupid situations; 'Can climb into the oven to clean it?'.

Besides the general bashing of Shyamalan, what part (since you know his ego won't let him not cast himself) do you think he'll play? I'm guessing he'll play a cop who's sent to investigate the place when the children call 911.

 

[DefunctTheory]

Once, years ago, when I was in the Army, I had a morning bowel movement and found there was blood in the toilet. I went to the hospital, where a very cute female doctor asked me some fairly awkward question, then put on a glove and rummaged through my anal cavities for 15 minutes trying to find a problem. I then had to look her in the face while we discussed how to deal with hemorrhoids in possibly the most embarrassing situation I have been in during my adult life.

I think I'd rather revisit that moment in my life for 2 hours then watch this movie.

As for what role he'll play, I'm afraid you've probably gotten it right.

 

[madwarper]

I've seen a few tv commercials for this. They never mentioned Shyamalan as the director.

Seems it's shot in and around Philly. So, not much of a twist there.

 

[Rylot]

I've seen a few tv commercials for this. They never mentioned Shyamalan as the director.

They didn't do that for After Earth either.

OT: Yeah, it looks hysterically bad. I don't know how its possible that this guy could've delivered us The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable and Signs. Maybe he got brain damage sometime in the early 2000s. Maybe he was replaced with a reptilian double.

While I liked Unbreakable and even Signs (up until the stupidity of the ending) at least for me they were definitely weren't as good as Sixth Sense. Maybe this is a case of a competent directory getting really lucky with his first movie and getting such an inflated ego that he thinks he's better than he truly is and surrounds himself with 'yes men' and has walled himself off in his own little universe devoid of criticism.

 

[Callate]

I saw a poster for this about a month ago. My first thought was, "they're still letting him make movies?"

So, yes, they are- "found footage" movies shot with near-unknown actors. Which says all you need to know about the kind of budget at risk here.

I've liked some of Shyamalan's movies in the past. But yes, it's clear that he got a hugely exaggerated sense of his own talent early on, and the reality of several critical and box-office drubbings doesn't seem to have corrected his course much. For some directors, constraints like this would be an opportunity to hone one's craft and get a handle on what really worked in previous films, where the auteur's strengths lie.

Based on the trailer, this doesn't seem to be the case, here. Clearly the movie centers around what's supposed to be a big and compelling mystery, but recent Shyamalan efforts don't encourage faith that the payoff will be interesting, or well-rooted in what's come before, or even coherent. The bottom line is the creator is winking sideways and saying "What's behind the door...?!" in a creepy voice, and I suspect I won't be alone in saying, "You know what? I don't care."

 

[Scarim Coral]

I think it's more of an "horror" that he is still in the movie industry!

As for his cameo, I'm expecting something more mudane like a mailman.

As for the movie, I expecting the grandma to be some kinda of an werewold for some reason, probably cos of the wall scratching.

 

[Just Ebola]

It's not unusual for me to laugh at a scary movie that's unintentionally funny, but this may be the first time just the trailer has made me laugh uncontrollably.

Nobody should have to walk in on their grandpa and hear "I was just cleaning it!"

Seriously though, it's a pretty good premise, but Shyamalan is the unofficial king of mishandled good ideas. I'm sure we all have at least one memory of visiting relatives and getting a creepy vibe.

 

[FPLOON]

When I first saw that trailer, two things came to mind that day: Is this a modern [re]take on Hansel and Gretel and why does the boy look more familiar than the mother on Skype, who looks like she's had previous movie roles before?

Other than that, I have no expectations for this movie the same way I did when I finally saw After Earth, Shyamalan did a great job not directing Wayward Pines, and the last time I got hyped for something turned out to be a horrible adaptation that I was too blind to see it as such until after a good re-watch of the original source material... Then again, the one movie from Shyamalan I still want to see [on DVD] is Lady in the Water just to "satisfy" my younger self since he got hyped for that particular movie just by seeing the first trailer in a theater near him at the time...

 

[Skatologist]

Some others have noticed this as well, Shymalan productions don't seem to actually emphasis Shymalan making it anymore. I think the Last Airbender had been the film that last sort of openly tied it to the name while others afterward just kind of... hide it in the credit blip at the end with no emphasis.

I'm just wondering what the forced plot twist will be. Something about demonic aliens taking over the grandparents' minds no doubt. Shymalan could also be some sort of religious figure like a priest or something.

Spoiler: Heres the movie poster as well

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

I learn that Shyamalan's making the movie himself with the money he got from After Earth. So if nothing else, nobody actually gave him money for this movie...

 

[Ihateregistering1]

Shyamalan did a great job not directing Wayward Pines...

Did he seriously almost direct a "Wayward Pines" adaptation? Thank God he didn't; I loved that book and that would have been tragic.

Anyway...

Shyamalan is like the Kenny Powers of directing. He had one movie that was both a mega-hit and well-reviewed (The Sixth Sense) then he had a movie that did make a lot of money but wasn't nearly as well-reviewed (Unbreakable), and then it's just been continuously going downhill since then, yet he still somehow keeps going on that one moment of glory. Somehow studios seem to keep believing that he's going to strike gold again and make another movie that is as good as "Sixth Sense", but if he does I'd be shocked.

 

[FPLOON]

Then again, the one movie from Shyamalan I still want to see [on DVD] is Lady in the Water just to "satisfy" my younger self since he got hyped for that particular movie just by seeing the first trailer in a theater near him at the time...

For the record, they advertised that as a horror film when the movie is, in Shyamalan's own words, a fairy tale.

That would explain why my younger self wanted to see that movie... He wasn't too fond with horror movies just yet, anyway...

 

[Fox12]

I don't know what you're talking about, this is the best looking comedy I've seen in ages.

Also, this strikes me as normal old people behavior.

 

[Rylot]

As for his cameo, I'm expecting something more mudane like a mailman.

After that one time he cast himself as a great writer who would go unappreciated in his time but whose works would ultimately change the entire world, all bets are off.

When you start making Stephen King's cameos and stand in characters subtle and well thought out, something has gone very, very wrong.

 

[FPLOON]

Shyamalan did a great job not directing Wayward Pines...

Did he seriously almost direct a "Wayward Pines" adaptation? Thank God he didn't; I loved that book and that would have been tragic.

Of course not[footnote]Except the pilot, of course... [/footnote]... He was "just" the Executive Producer... Unless then ending to "Season 1" was suppose to be...

Spoiler: this the whole time,

that no matter what Ethan and crew did, the First Generation would prevail in the end,

then "oh boy"! Good thing Shyamalan wasn't [fully] directing, then...

 

[ObsidianJones_v1legacy]

I think this might, at least, recoup its money. One of the main reasons why M. Night doesn't do well any more because you can easily find out his 'twists' which as a lot of posters point out, is his whole gimmick. What's this twist, what's this twist. Back in the time of the Sixth Sense, you could still relatively miss it. Save for us computer geeks of that time, it wasn't wide spread. Cut to now, and everyone is issued a smart phone from birth.

The other reason is that his movies are horrible.

However, one of the reasons why it might at least recoup is for the simple fact that we all like the spectacle of watching a trainwreck, and M. Night is quickly becoming Hollywood's Tommy Wiseau.

 

[vagabondwillsmile]

When I first saw that trailer, two things came to mind that day: Is this a modern [re]take on Hansel and Gretel and why does the boy look more familiar than the mother on Skype, who looks like she's had previous movie roles before?

Other than that, I have no expectations for this movie the same way I did when I finally saw After Earth, Shyamalan did a great job not directing Wayward Pines, and the last time I got hyped for something turned out to be a horrible adaptation that I was too blind to see it as such until after a good re-watch of the original source material... Then again, the one movie from Shyamalan I still want to see [on DVD] is Lady in the Water just to "satisfy" my younger self since he got hyped for that particular movie just by seeing the first trailer in a theater near him at the time...

Lady in the Water is horrible. I'm willing to bet the feeling you have of not knowing right now, is better than anything you could feel during the course of actually watching the movie. It is really, really bad. And no small portion of the film is devoted to self-agrandizing and giving the finger to critics.

I know a lot of people feel differently, but Unbreakable is still my favorite film of his. Immediately followed by The Sixth Sense. Signs started to lose me in the third act; but it was watchable and I found a lot of it genuinely funny and touching. And it all went down hill from there.

But this movie, I don't know. The idea of seing people you love, or who are related to you, behave strangely/dangerously is really unnerving. And from what I saw, I can imagine that there would be scenes that would creep me out a little. HOWEVER, I can already tell I won't be able to accept the idea that the grandparents are existing in a vaccuum - so much so that legitimate concerns about their behavior is written off as them literally being "just old". If they are that fucked up, how do their kids not know? Do their kids never visit them? If their kids never visit them, why do they care to send the grandkids to visit them? When the grandparents act all weird why do the parents not trust the grandkids (their kids)? They trust these strangers they know nothing about and never see more than their offspring? WTF?

I know for a fact that when I was a kid, if I went to someone's house and they started acting all weird, I and called my parents about it, they would get their asses the car, drive ANY distance and find out what the actual fuck was going on and get me the hell out of there. I know because I needed them to get me from somewhere when I was little and they did. Just like any normal parent would.

So all I'll be able to see in this movie is a garbage miscommunication conflict plot to hang a horror story on.

And that's LAAAAAZY!

Edit: After watching the second preview which included another SEPARATE scene of the kids asking their mom to come get them and help them - their plea evidently going unanswered, I have to say: No. Fuck this movie and fuck its lazy script.

 

[DefunctTheory]

Edit: After watching the second preview which included another SEPARATE scene of the kids asking their mom to come get them and help them - their plea evidently going unanswered, I have to say: No. Fuck this movie and fuck its lazy script.

My head canon is that the twist is that the mother and the grand parents are epic jerks, and that all the strange behavior and douchie parenting is a practical joke they're playing on the kids.

I am 100% sure that is a better twist then what will actually be in the movie.

 

[Gottesstrafe]

I've seen a few tv commercials for this. They never mentioned Shyamalan as the director.

Seems it's shot in and around Philly. So, not much of a twist there.

Just saw one of those commercials an hour ago, they do mention him at the end actually.

Anyway, who wants to make bets on what the "twist" is at the end? The obvious one is that the grandmother has dementia or something like that, but I'm leaning towards the "Unreliable Narrator" trope. I dunno, maybe the kids had some sort of drug problem and were sent to their grandparents' house to get clean, and the weird behavior they're seeing is a combination of withdrawal symptoms and their grandparents freaking out over it. Or something stupid like the kids were demon possessed and that they were sent way out in the sticks to be quarantined.

 

[Gordon_4_v1legacy]

Where's the promised sequel to Unbreakable you miserable bastard? Stop trying horror, you're crap at it.

CAPTCH: "nice job". After doing all but actually assassinating every good thing about Avatar the Last Airbender, Shyamalan will need to not only make one of the best movies ever, but cure one kind of cancer, to hear me say those words.