Godavari said:
3) I want to avoid "crime/killing simulators," e.g. GTA, as much as possible.
Out of interest, why?
It can't be a problem with killing (let's face it, even sports games are getting in on the act with games like Blitz : The League), which means that there's a problem with crime? I only ask because Saints Row (and it's mildly better sequel) are actually surprisingly funny games with a decent anarchic "fight tha powah!" message behind them, and every GTA after III has been a well-written cross between Hollywood crime dramas and a general parody/pseudo-study of American culture of the period it represents.
If it's a problem with parents, use the previous paragraph and it'll make you sound really smart and GTA/Saints Row sound really good.
Also, if you're new to gaming, don't discount Halo based on what you've read on here - most people just enjoy trashing what's popular. Halo : Combat Evolved and Halo 2 are fun little shooters with a strong storyline and good pacing. Halo 3 was... Saved by the multiplayer... And I haven't played ODST, but I've heard it's good.
Beyond that, in order of importance...
Fallout 3 : Game of the Year Edition. If you get no other games this Christmas, Fallout 3 will at least keep you occupied until sometime in March, when you'll realise that you've forgotten about the outside world.
Borderlands. I can't, in all good faith, not suggest this game. Make sure you have friends. If you don't have any, kidnap a delivery boy and tape a controller to his hands. Remember - welding someone's hands to a controller creates a stronger bond, but can damage the controller.
Need for Speed : Shift. Personal preference here, but it's always been my favourite racing series.
Assassin's Creed ONE. I'm led to believe that the game will make no/less sense unless you've played the first one.
Gears of War (1 or 2, doesn't matter). Cinematic,
ultraviolent ultrastylised, and a plot that makes no sense but it worth it if you're pissed/stoned/playing with a mate.
Also, if you can get your hands on a copy, try to find NHL Hitz 2003. It's not the most realistic Ice Hockey game in the world, but me and my mates had an absolute blast while we played it. Make your friends in the game. Give them all duck heads. Make yourself a raptor/pirate/ninja. It's hilarious.