So I'm in this three way relationship

[Cylos Treh]

Hey, if it works it works.
My rules would be as long as i am involved too.

 

[The Last Parade]

multiamoury, it's normal more people do it than you might think

 

[Grabbin Keelz]

Hmm, haven't quite heard of anything different. A bit of an odd arrangement to say the least, it will end with either yourself or Dave being left for the other guy, and I would say you've got a better chance then Dave, so good luck, but yeah the other alternative which I think is less likely to one of those two possibilities, is that all three of you part ways.

Have you made out with Emily yet? That'd be one base which would make it more interesting.

...okay, I think you misread a bit. This isn't a competition, we're all friends. Also Dave has been with Emily since they were in high school and Emily lives with him when she's not at her dorm, also he's in nursing making him the steadier supply of income. Even if she did so much as consider breaking up with Dave, the guilt would kill me. Stealing someone's lover right from under their nose, that is a dick move beyond any dick move.

Also we have made out and did other sexy things, just not sex.

 

[Grabbin Keelz]

And you people wonder why humanity is taking a dive straight into the ground. Those standards are so low you could trip over them. This is so sickening, you humans are so stupid.

I was honestly expecting more comments like this one. Not only was this the only one, but it was shot down pretty quickly by everyone else. Thanks Escapist, I knew I could count on you.
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_jnjkp0UlAU4/TKduT9sFByI/AAAAAAAAAB8/QEUxRHboLBM/s1600/good-job.jpg

 

[Powereaver]

nothing wrong with open relationships... as long as everyone consents all is ok with me and Dolly Parton .. her and carl have had an open marriage for donkeys years

 

[Conza]

Hmm, haven't quite heard of anything different. A bit of an odd arrangement to say the least, it will end with either yourself or Dave being left for the other guy, and I would say you've got a better chance then Dave, so good luck, but yeah the other alternative which I think is less likely to one of those two possibilities, is that all three of you part ways.

Have you made out with Emily yet? That'd be one base which would make it more interesting.

...okay, I think you misread a bit. This isn't a competition, we're all friends. Also Dave has been with Emily since they were in high school and Emily lives with him when she's not at her dorm, also he's in nursing making him the steadier supply of income. Even if she did so much as consider breaking up with Dave, the guilt would kill me. Stealing someone's lover right from under their nose, that is a dick move beyond any dick move.

Also we have made out and did other sexy things, just not sex.

Its not really a dick move though.

The saying goes, 'bros before hoes' yes, but this axim is also only applicable if you were friends with the guy first, then he has a girlfriend you like, thats when it stays still.

You met this girl, you've done stuff 'with this girl' you are both in an affaire. Its not a three-way, not really, she will eventually break up with either one or both of you, the trick is to make sure its just the other guy, and then you and her are in the clear.

 

[repeating integers]

Some girl asked me if she could date other men and still see me, I would kick her ass to the curb. Have a zero tolerance policy when it comes to my girlfriend and other guys. I don't care how drunk you were, kiss someone else, were done. Not about second chances, its about being accountable for your actions. Very pissed off when women throw a fit over this, you know what you were doing, don't give me that crap.

Isn't that a little... insecure? Plenty of marriages have survived larger incidents.

 

[That One Six]

Open relationships are... tricky. From what I've seen, they rarely last long and someone always ends up getting hurt. If you're happy, though, then you're lucky, but when it comes down to it, it is doubtful that Emily will choose you over Dave. So long as you're cool with that, I wish you the best.

 

[chronicfc]

Its open, you're all happy, why the fuck not?

 

[Shockolate]

Isn't that polygamy?
Or some variation of it.

The term you're looking for is "polyandry."

The word you both are looking for is Polyamory. which is a relationship between multiple parties.

Polygamy and Polyandry imply marriage in some way.

Just sayin'.

 

[teisjm]

Hmmm. 3 people, beeing honest with each other, and putting themselves above ugly things like jealousy? Having the guts deviate from the societal norm, solely based on the facts that noone is hurting anyone, and that everyone involved is okay with/enjoying whats going on?
Blasphemous!
You're a disgrace, like them damn kids playing their stupid video-games, instead of working in the fields.
You should learn to addapt to the proper mindset of a jealous ownership of your partner.

Sarcasm aside, good for you, just make sure not to get too involved, so your feelings don't get hurt too much when it ends.
Also, make sure you're all clear on where each others boundries goes, when it comes to sex.
Rather ask that awkward question "you okay with me banging your girl bro?" before, than appologize for it afterwards, if it turns out he wasn't willing to share her that much.

 

[DevilWithaHalo]

The only real difference between Open Relationships and Polyamorous Relationships are the varied amounts of emotion you share with your partners. They can work, and they can be fun, but in my experience they come with an expiration date.

I live in one of the most... "open" cities in the nation, and I still haven't met one person that was truly honest with themselves or others when it came to this. But that's a long and complicated rant.

Sigh, back to the few that I'm involved with at the moment. You'd think I should be having more fun like you, but I'm not. Women... am I right?

 

[TorqueConverter]

So the story up until now...

In my freshman year of college I met a girl (we'll call her Emily to make it easier) whom I spoke with one day and we became friends. See, the first day we met she had told me she had a boyfriend so I was all "Well that blows that chance, but she's still cool so we'll just be friends" and I was fine with that. A while later I met her boyfriend too (we'll call him Dave) and he was really cool too and we also became friends. By the way, Emily is a junior and Dave has graduated.

So a year later (she's now a senior) we're still friends and Emily has an idea. One night she asks Dave if me and her can date and do all the things that come with dating. He said it was fine and so we dated. We haven't actually had sex yet, but we've pretty much done everything else. I'm really loving this even though I know it'll end by the end of this semester. Everything we do is relayed to each other, nothing is hidden. Me and Dave take turns going out with Emily whenever we have spare time, and sometimes we just all go out to do something. It's fun, it really is.

I've just never heard of something like this happening to anyone else, so I wanted to know what the standard internet reaction would be. What would you call this kind of relationship?

Standard internet reaction: Sounds like Dave might want access to your bum but hasn't gotten around to askin' yet. I you're cool with that, then whatever, but if not then you know.. watch out. Other than that reaction, uh.. have sex with other women also. Bro fist i guess?

 

[Terminal Blue]

I've just never heard of something like this happening to anyone else, so I wanted to know what the standard internet reaction would be. What would you call this kind of relationship?

It's not polygamy or polyandry because both of those terms refer to marriage practices.

Call it whatever you want. Terms like 'open relationship' or 'polyamory' (often abbreviated to 'poly') tend to be pretty well understood ways of communicating the idea, but unless you're interested in wanting to date other people as well I'm not sure it matters so much because you don't need to identify yourself. Technically, I think you're in a 'triadic relationship', but I wouldn't say that because the term raises some pretty uncomfortable preconceptions to anyone familiar with psychology.

I find terminologically it's sometimes best to let people figure things out for themselves if they have the open-mindedness to do so.

Anyway, your situation sounds great. Why does it have to end?

 

[Mikeyfell]

The turn taking 3 way mechanic doesn't work nearly as well as you might expect.

If it's too structured it'll feel like work
If it's not structured enough it'll she'll eventually have (To quote XKCD) a Statistically-significant-other

If you want it to work (I mean passed the first time you both want to be with her on the same day) all 3 of you should be going out on the dates.

 

[ks1234]

So the story up until now...

Sounds like your getting all of the workload (taking her out and paying for shit) with none of the payoff (sex! duh) while she's banging this other guy...
Yep... sounds like you're getting screwed.

 

[winginson]

Three way relationships can be great, but the more intimate it gets the greater the chance of being hurt. From what I've seen there always seems to be the third wheel who only gets any when the other two want them to.

The type of open relationship I like the most is where there are two intimate people who are allowed to have a fling now and again. Just make sure you know what the other person is cool with ie. only with people you don't find romantically attractive, always use protection, don't neglect your other, limits on sexual activities etc.

One last thing. If in the future you want a closed relationship or want to go out with someone who would only have a closed relationship, you may find it very hard to meet someone who is OK with your past open relationships. You quite often get dumped in the sex-obsessed, greedy, dirty, would cheat on me pile.



Captcha: enjoy tedthri. What the hell is a tedthri? Could be fun.

 

[rayen020]

Take Dave on a date.

That is all.

 

[GigaHz]

I've heard of sloppy seconds, but this is ridiculous.

These kind of things are fun for a one night deal, but forming the basis of an entire relationship? You're dreaming if you think that this will last longer than one or two weeks.

 

[Inuprince]

You sir are a lucky lucky man. Enjoy this while it lasts.

I don't understand. Why is he lucky?

I am not biased toward the whole situation, I just don't get why a few comments say this guy is supposed to be lucky. He gets to share someone else's girlfriend. Sure that is still more than some unfortunate people can say for themselves, but still I think this is just sad. He would be lucky if HE was dating two girls, or Dave too not just Emily, whatever anyone's preference is...

Just saying that in the long run it probably won't work out, he probably has a 1/3 chance of getting out of this good, and perhaps all this time he could have already found another girl, who he could be together with, without worrying about some 3rd party, and just be together, consequence free.