So you find out your best friend's girlfriend is cheating on him.. with his best friend..

[Phasmal]

Eh, I'd tell.
Both the girlfriend and the other friend are doing wrong, so why should I protect them?
I'd wanna be told if I was being cheated on, so yeah. I'd tell.

 

[JeffBergGold]

I'm snitching. I'm snitching.

Here's why:

Any friend of mine is going to know way ahead of time--before our friendship is established to get this far--that I have a no tolerance policy on cheating. They will know this and memorize to the point that it gets engraved into their goddamn minds.

So if one of them fucks up, does this shit and I find out about it. Fucking consequences.

I am more than prepared to severe relationship ties over this. The most I will do is tell friend #2 to tell friend #1 just what the hell he's been doing in a time limit. If they do not make this time limit, then I Will Snitch.

The way I see it, I'll probably lose at least one friend in the end. Because when you make your world as small as this, it's gonna get out eventually. Just a matter of time. I'd much rather lose the cheating traitor than the other one.

Because I'd lose all the respect I had for him in the single instant I learned that sex was had.

But it's not the other guys fault it is the girls fault.

No, no, no, no... It is BOTH his fault and her fault.

Yes, she's a traitorous slut. But friend #2 didn't have to sleep with her. What, he couldn't have shut her down? Couldn't have then told friend #1 "hey, your girl is a slut who tried to put the moves on me?"

Sure, you can say there's no certainty the first friend would believe second friend. But even so, second didn't have to fuck her.

I mean, seriously. Not his fault? What did she blackmail him? Did she make sure to trip him while she was on a bed so that he'd fall on top of her? And it just so happened that they were naked? Bull Fucking Shit.

Unless she forced herself on him--because, yeah, that can happen sadly enough--it is oh so very much his fault as much as it is hers.

I seriously have to ask, why is she a slut? That is a pretty harsh word to use just because she slept with someone else.

I get what you're saying but I don't think it is as serious as you're making it out to be. I mean the alternative is the guys stay friends and get rid of the girl OR everyone can stay friends! They're just having sex I don't see what the big deal is. I mean she can still love one guy but be physically attracted to both? How is that wrong? Does being in a relationship mean being in misery? I always thought relationships were supposed to increase happiness. Not diminish it by imposing rules.

 

[DaWaffledude]

I guess I'd ask the best friend's best friend and the girlfriend to tell the best friend who... Uh... My head hurts.

 

[game-lover]

I seriously have to ask, why is she a slut? That is a pretty harsh word to use just because she slept with someone else.

I get what you're saying but I don't think it is as serious as you're making it out to be. I mean the alternative is the guys stay friends and get rid of the girl OR everyone can stay friends! They're just having sex I don't see what the big deal is. I mean she can still love one guy but be physically attracted to both? How is that wrong? Does being in a relationship mean being in misery? I always thought relationships were supposed to increase happiness. Not diminish it by imposing rules.

I'm using it because she slept with someone else. It's the cheating that makes her a slut. Other words I'd call her include whore, skank, tramp and probably various combos of the two. It tells me she values sex and getting an orgasm over the feelings of her boyfriend. That's why I'd call her those things.

And it's not just about the sex here. At least to me. It's the lying and sneaking around. The fact that this question is even being asked implies that the girl and the other friend are doing this behind her boyfriend's back. That's the shitty part.

No, there's nothing truly wrong with being attracted to someone else. The wrong part comes when you act on that attraction. The wrong part comes when she got herself into a monogamous relationship where it was verbally and nonverbally agreed that the only man she'd sleep with was her boyfriend. And then decided just because she was apparently so horny that she'd just renege on the agreement. Because forget him. He's not here and she needs to get laid.

Being in a relationship doesn't mean being in misery. They are supposed to increase happiness. But how can lying and deceiving make the boyfriend happy? It sounds like only the girl gets to be happy because she's having sex with two guys at the same time. And if she was gonna be miserable having a boyfriend, she never should have gotten into a relationship in the first place.

All in all, it's just not fair. As far as we know, boyfriend hasn't had sex with anyone but her. Assuming he's faithful. He could have been screwing who knew how many ladies instead of resisting all this time. All the girls and propositions he could have turned down trying to be truthful and honest and loyal to the girlfriend when all this time he could have have been having all kinds of sex.

You know what's another alternative besides the two you mentioned? Friend 1 can ditch friend 2 and the girlfriend. Then replace them with a better best friend and girlfriend respectively. Or not even getting a new girlfriend. He could instead play the field and make up for all the various sex he missed out on trying to be faithful to a girl who couldn't do the same.

 

[ScrabbitRabbit]

Hah, you're fucked.

If you say nothing, you support the cheating mate. If you say something, you support the cheated mate. You have to choose who is your better mate.

Best option, tell the cheater you will let your other mate know unless they tell him first. Hope that they do. If they don't, you're back to my previous paragraph.

If they don't then I'd make good on my promise. The cheating mate is in the wrong, I'd rather have the friend who's less likely to fuck me over at some point in the future.

 

[Syzygy23]

What would you do in this situation, if it happened?

Basically:

You find out that your best friend's girlfriend, is cheating on him, with his best friend, who is also your other best friend?

Would you tell him, and risk ruining both your friendships, or let it carry on?

BTW I'm not actually in this situation, lol.

I'd confront the other best friend myself and call him out on his bullshit. If he refused to stop acting like a dickshit and call off the affair then I'd inform my best friend, because he'd want to know.

 

[shrekfan246]

I'll admit, I thought it was more interesting when I thought the OP was implying that you would be the one sleeping with your best friend's girlfriend, and you just find out about it because you were doing it all in an out-of-body experience type of thing. Also because I only have one best friend.

I'd probably inform him then? Depending on how well I know the girlfriend? Or how well I like this 'secondary' best friend... I could feign ignorance and flex my acting muscles whenever he did happen to find out. "What? Oh that sucks. No, I didn't know anything about it, why would I know?"

 

[Chimpzy_v1legacy]

In that scenario ... I'd start looking for new friends. There is no victory to be found there, not even a pyrrhic one.

 

[Ljs1121]

I'd probably not say anything and deny knowing about it.

Unless either party knew I had found out, in which case, I'd feel the right thing to do would be to tell the person that was being cheated on.

 

[OldKingClancy]

I would tell the boyfriend.

He's my friend so I'm obligated to tell him his girl isn't good for him and that our 'friend' in an asshole.

Would it ruin a friendship? Absolutely but considering it it probably wasn't that great to begin with if the other friend slept with his girlfriend.

 

[Swyftstar]

Seduce her. That is the only option. Or would that make the situation more complicated?

This. If the seducing doesn't work you could always blackmail her... or him if that's your preference, I don't judge.

 

[Vern5]

This is exactly why people should not have best friends. I can't count the number of times I've heard this exact same story. I'm pretty sure there are songs written about this very situation as well, from multiple points of view.

Honestly, if you already know about the cheating then you should just reveal it to the person who doesn't. That way you can avoid the whole "Did you know about this?" coupled with "Why didn't you tell me?"

But seriously. Don't have best friends. Statistically, they will always end up with your girl.

 

[MrMixelPixel]

Well, I'm just imagining that this is happening to my friends. I'd be rightfully irritated. I'd calmly assess the situation, and if my suspicions of cheating were true... I'd yell at everyone involved, the cheating girlfriend and the cheating best friend. I'd comfort the best-friend that got cheated on. I don't think we'd ostracize the two cheaters from our group, but they'd not be treated to kindly by us for some time.

 

[manic_depressive13]

How can you have two best friends? If they are "best" there can only be one. I'd side with whoever I liked better.

And why would telling ruin both my friendships?

 

[Moonlight Butterfly]

I'd tell them and encourage them to still be friends but lose the conniving *****. (and I'd say that if it was a guy too)

Bros before hos.

 

[Risingblade]

Tell him, a real friend wouldn't do that to a friend.

 

[DanDeFool]

Best to let them work those things out themselves and act like you don't know anything. You just set yourself up for a world of shit getting involved in their business.

edit: seeing as you're not taking my advice here lol. I only said this from experience as I was in this very position. Yes, if you're a true friend you should be able to tell your friends this stuff BUT a lot of times you get caught in the middle of a shit storm you really didn't want to be in and stuff is awkward after awhile. Yeah you'll still be friends but there will always be this lingering cloud.

idk just my 2 cents. I say stay out of it.

I think this is probably the best option, but... well, if you decide to go this route, make sure neither of them find out that you know. If they do, the shit cannon will be pointed squarely at YOUR face.

Or, you could go the more honest (but riskier) approach, which is to get you and your friends around the table, and blow the lid off the whole thing. It might destroy your circle of friends, but you've got a chance to convince your buddies that they're both being played for fools by this selfish harpy, that they should patch things up between each other, and eject the stupid ***** out of both their lives for good.

Or, who knows? You might find out that your two friends and this chick are involved in some kind of non-traditional relationship, and it's not really "cheating" at all. Unlikely, but stranger things have happened.

captcha: "goody goody gumdrops". No, not really, but thanks for trying to cheer us up.

 

[Dogstile]

I apologize and tell the dude i'm sorry, i'll not get drunk with her in the future. I haven't been on the other side of it.