Sorry...how do you say it?

[DemonicVixen]

If you have hurt someone, how do you apologise? What if you've done something so terrible that you do not think it will work, what do you do then?

As you might guess i have done something stupid and now im paying the price. What i have done, has been done in the past also, and they already said it hurts them. I do not know what to do. I truly am sorry to them and despise myself for hurting them even though i feel i do have cause, which i have tried to explain to them but they obviously don't understand it.
I can't tell them face to face that im sorry because it will be a while before i see them, they won't answer my text or calls and won't answer on MSN/Skype which we use. Please help before i lose them.

 

[DuplicateValue]

Well if you can't contact them then there's not much you can do.

Really though, when you do see them, just say nothing. Walk up and hug them - even if they resist.

On what scale exactly was this thing you did? You don't have to answer, I'm just curious. =]

 

[PurpleSkull]

Care to elaborate your problem? There is no general "Sorry". Every problem needs a special sort of apology. Although, remorse is a good step for every mistake.

Really though, when you do see them, just say nothing. Walk up and hug them - even if they resist.=]

Wait, what? If someone (for example) f*cks my girlfriend, screw me out of money and generally lied to me all the time and THEN walks in on me and tries to hug me, even if i resist...I would punch him back to Baghdad. If he already lives there, send him orbiting till he arrives a second time. Not a very healthy advise

 

[DeadlyYellow]

Infidelity?

Just curious.

 

[Danny Ocean]

I can't tell them face to face that im sorry because it will be a while before i see them, they won't answer my text or calls and won't answer on MSN/Skype which we use. Please help before i lose them.

Well then there's nothing anyone can do. You need to wait till you next see them and fix it then.

 

[Jedoro]

Get a common friend to send the message that you wish to apologize, and then hope they'll answer you when you try to get in touch again. There's only so much you can do, and once you've done what you can, let it go because it's out of your hands.

 

[Jory]

You can't do much I'm afraid if they're not listening. I had a massive upset with one of my best mates earlier this year and we didn't speak for ages. But the time away helps, and doesn't make it worse like it might seem.

 

[Sonofadiddly]

Don't try to explain yourself. Just say that the other person is absolutely right and they have every right to be mad, and that you deserve whatever you get but will do anything to set it right.

 

[A_Parked_Car]

I have hurt people before...I just straight up apologized. You say the person isn't responding to you...well Then give them some time (which I know is really hard to do). The worst mistake I made is frantically spamming messages and such, which just resulted in me losing them forever. So yeah, just try giving them some space and when you feel that you have given them enough time then apologize sincerely.

 

[DuplicateValue]

Care to elaborate your problem? There is no general "Sorry". Every problem needs a special sort of apology. Although, remorse is a good step for every mistake.

Really though, when you do see them, just say nothing. Walk up and hug them - even if they resist.=]

Wait, what? If someone (for example) f*cks my girlfriend, screw me out of money and generally lied to me all the time and THEN walks in on me and tries to hug me, even if i resist...I would punch him back to Baghdad. If he already lives there, send him orbiting till he arrives a second time. Not a very healthy advise

I'm assuming the OP is talking about a partner, not a friend. And is a girl. I should've probably checked.

Edit: She is a girl, my advice still stands until new information comes to light.

 

[PurpleSkull]

Well, the people SHE hurt could be female too, which validates my point yet again. And even if not, come on... you shouldn't try physical contact with people that hates you. Especially against their will.

 

[x0ny]

I'm very careful with my words and always think twice before saying anything. Plus I'm on the quiet side anyway, so there's not actually alot of thinking involved. But anyway, if you decided you can't solve this problem, think about how you can prevent the next.

 

[dont_blink]

email them, asking them to meet up. i know you said it'll be a while before you see them, but i'm certain that if it's that important, you can make it.

christmas is a time of forgiveness, after all.

do your best. internet-apologies dont half make up for real life ones.

you could post a present either. something meaningful, not something tacky.

 

[dont_blink]

I have hurt people before...I just straight up apologized. You say the person isn't responding to you...well Then give them some time (which I know is really hard to do). The worst mistake I made is frantically spamming messages and such, which just resulted in me losing them forever. So yeah, just try giving them some space and when you feel that you have given them enough time then apologize sincerely.

oh, also this.

EDIT- SORRY for the double post ><

 

[carpathic]

Just remember, apologies are a social lubricant. They do little more than ease issues.

Better instead to show how your behaviour has changed.

 

[DannyFree]

It really does have to be face-to-face in my opinion. There's way too much sincerity in NVC we take for granted.

When I'm sorry, the first thing that comes to mind when I think about it is usually the best thing to say. If you dwell on what to say too much you resort to clichés and stretch further from your actual thoughts on the matter.