Stupidest escort missions/characters in your experience.

[FilipJPhry]

snip

Damn, I remember escorting that prostitute from Dukov's Place and forgetting to kill the Enclave soldiers with the Deathclaw just outside. She kept dying and dying and dying! Finally, I just gave up.

 

[Viral_Lola]

Everybody in Dead Rising, *breaks controller in frustration. RE4, at least Ashely got kidnapped and could hide in a bin.

 

[robert01]

I have hated every escort missions I have ever been forced to do. I think the WORST are the ones in MMOS and the formula for that was always this.

1)Enter Cave
2)Clear cave of mobs
3)Find random escort of defenseless NPC in cave
4)Accept quest knowing cave is clear
5)Halfway through cave mobs respawn
6)NPC dies
7)Fuck it, never go back.

Dead Rising... Oh God, Dead Rising. EVERY escort character in that game.


Also, Silent Hill 4: The Room. The latter half of the game is one long escort mission. Granted, your escort can't die during gameplay, but if she takes too much damage or if you leave her alone for too long she has a higher chance of dying during the final boss fight, resulting in a bad ending (you'll still beat the game and all, but yeah).

Totally forgot about that shit, that was terrible too. There was a glitch where you could heal her though, you just had to make sure you had held onto all of your candles.

 

[The Wykydtron]

Can I just say every game that has escort missions except ICO?

Yeah i'll go with that, funny how a game that is entirely comprised of one huge escort mission (i assume, haven't finished it yet but i doubt it goes tower defence halfway through) is actually the best example of escort missions done right.

Can the Companion Cube count as an escort mission? If so, i may have a decent theory as to what makes a good escort mission...

 

[Kopikatsu]

Can I just say every game that has escort missions except ICO?

Yeah i'll go with that, funny how a game that is entirely comprised of one huge escort mission (i assume, haven't finished it yet but i doubt it goes tower defence halfway through) is actually the best example of escort missions done right.

Can the Companion Cube count as an escort mission? If so, i may have a decent theory as to what makes a good escort mission...

Resident Evil 4 was pretty good about it in my opinion. 'Oh, hey, zombies are attacking. GET IN THE GODDAMN DUMPSTER!'. Ashley would also duck if you aimed in her general direction, which was nice. She also made a ton of noise when she got 'captured' so it wasn't like you would suddenly get a game over without knowing what happened.

 

[CardinalPiggles]

All of them.

Escort missions are very stupid because not a single game developer can get it fucking right. End of.

 

[King of the Sandbox]

Dead Rising, no one survivor, just the entire game.
I swear the people of Willamette must have some sort of stupid formula inserted in their water.

This.... oh, dear god, this.

Apparently whatever turned everyone into zombies also turned the survivors into my greatest argument FOR the zombocalypse.

 

[Josue Rodriguez]

Well the Bioshock escort wasn't SO bad...a bit annoying but not terrible...i can't think of one I hate, I can think of a few that I liked...like a few in Red Dead Redemption and Minnie Mouse from Kingdom Hearts...at least she was attacking a bunch of heartless, she wasn't useless...like Ashley...yes...THAT Ashley

 

[Wintermoot]

ANY
SR3 in particular herpa derp my car is on fire better keep riding it instead of bailing and getting a new car!
except the ones in the HL series Barney and Alex have a better survival instinct then lemmings.

 

[Dr Namgge]

Can I just say every game that has escort missions except ICO?

Yeah i'll go with that, funny how a game that is entirely comprised of one huge escort mission (i assume, haven't finished it yet but i doubt it goes tower defence halfway through) is actually the best example of escort missions done right.

firstly, finish it damn it. Ico is not a game that should be left unfinished.

Secondly, the reason Ico works even though it's a long escort mission is the same reason why Metal Gear solid works even though it's one long forced stealth mission. Because they're the key gameplay element. Added in as a mission, it's usually an afterthought, and the person you're escorting usually has god awful AI, all the common sense of a toaster, and isn't given much thought beyond "yes, it works" rather than "yes, it's fun".

Also, speaking of Metal Gear, Emma in MGS2 is a pain beyond measure. You have to accompany her through an underwater section full of mines (with bad water controls) and she can hold her breath for all of five seconds, so you're rushing. Then, you have to escort her through a heavily guarded area when her AI doesn't know how to stay out of sight. In a stealth game. Where being seen means your seconds from death. It's not fun.

 

[scorptatious]

Can I just say every game that has escort missions except ICO?

Yeah i'll go with that, funny how a game that is entirely comprised of one huge escort mission (i assume, haven't finished it yet but i doubt it goes tower defence halfway through) is actually the best example of escort missions done right.

Can the Companion Cube count as an escort mission? If so, i may have a decent theory as to what makes a good escort mission...

Oh yes. At least in ICO you can actually grab the girl's hand and take her to where you want her to go.

It's been a long time, but I don't remember the escort missions in Jak 2 being any fun. I haven't finished the game, but I do remember having a hell of a time doing the mission where you had to protect Sig.

 

[sextus the crazy]

All of them except for the one in fire emblem (GBA 2003); and that one was good because the character you had to "protect" would kill all the enemies himself if you didn't kill them first.