TF2 Mann vs Machine update. It's live!

[Black Arrow Officer]

I. Don't. Care.
Why the hell am I the only person saying this?! Oh, right, because I'm the only person here who didn't get the game on Day 1. You might think I'm trolling you right now, but I seriously believe that TF2 hates new players.
I've bought the game, played it, and hated it so much. I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing, I have no idea what my teammates are supposed to be doing, I have no idea what my teammates are talking about, and I have absolutely no desire to find out.
You people can keep playing TF2. You can keep liking it and I can accept you liking it. But please: the next time you're assigned to coach a new player, can you actually coach them? You don't want them winding up like me, do you?
...
Goddamnit, David Bjur.

Wut. I'm sorry, but wut? You honestly don't know what you're supposed to be doing? There's a training mode that's built just for confused people like you. Play against bots until you feel comfortable against real players. I'll even trade you some weapons if you add me on steam: http://steamcommunity.com/id/splintercellftw

I'll also gladly coach you. I'd hate to see a new player get turned off to the game so quickly. TF2 is a really great game, the only problem is that the amount of unlocks that are in the game now are kind of staggering to a newer player. But if you add me, I will help you get started.

 

[Agent Larkin]

This might actually convince me to play Team Fortress 2 again.

CAPTCHA: nose bleed.

I ain't no Manga character....

 

[Polock]

I. Don't. Care.
Why the hell am I the only person saying this?! Oh, right, because I'm the only person here who didn't get the game on Day 1. You might think I'm trolling you right now, but I seriously believe that TF2 hates new players.
I've bought the game, played it, and hated it so much. I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing, I have no idea what my teammates are supposed to be doing, I have no idea what my teammates are talking about, and I have absolutely no desire to find out.
You people can keep playing TF2. You can keep liking it and I can accept you liking it. But please: the next time you're assigned to coach a new player, can you actually coach them? You don't want them winding up like me, do you?
...
Goddamnit, David Bjur.

Not to much to get.

Capture points. Shoot people not your color. Learn as you go with weapons that have easy descriptions.

: /

Sorry mate.

 

[Korten12]

While I am probably grasping at straws but I noticed this:

I know the first part of the comic was probably just a joke, but maybe there is some hint to it? I just makes me wonder why in the ripped newspaper they would have the 'Robin' part. Female pirate class?

Spoiler

 

[Anget Colslaw]

This makes me wish I had a way of playing Team Fortress 2 even more now.

 

[DJ_DEnM]

I came buckets from this. I just...like...Fucking yes. I can't wait. We should start a steam group to come up with great strategies. I'll get on that! Anyone who wants to join, go ahead and quote me; Join the league! Down with the Robots!

 

[ResonanceSD]

Meanwhile, Valve fans cry out "We just fucking want Half Life 3!"

Anyway, seems pretty cool actually. Looking forward to what could come from this.

Nah, I'm actually ok with the perpetual updates to Team Fortress 2 and Dota 2.

Team Machine! Woo! =D

Turns out that Grey Mann is a spy! and who doesn't like spies? =D


Actually after watching that video, I'm still a RED spy.

 

[Cedric Rolle III]

I am going to re-activate my steam account, for this. Yay.

 

[Cedric Rolle III]

Grey Mann is a spy, holy crap thanks for the info.

 

[Cedric Rolle III]

I came buckets from this. I just...like...Fucking yes. I can't wait. We should start a steam group to come up with great strategies. I'll get on that! Anyone who wants to join, go ahead and quote me; Join the league! Down with the Robots!

I want to join your group.

 

[DJ_DEnM]

I came buckets from this. I just...like...Fucking yes. I can't wait. We should start a steam group to come up with great strategies. I'll get on that! Anyone who wants to join, go ahead and quote me; Join the league! Down with the Robots!

I want to join your group.

Will Invite.

Groups open guys. You can find it right here [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/groups/view/Mann-Vs-Machine]

 

[Easton Dark]

I came buckets from this. I just...like...Fucking yes. I can't wait. We should start a steam group to come up with great strategies. I'll get on that! Anyone who wants to join, go ahead and quote me; Join the league! Down with the Robots!

Strategies? It'll be the same strategies we've been using since 07. But heck, I'll join. I want to play this really bad.

 

[ResonanceSD]

Grey Mann is a spy, holy crap thanks for the info.

Well in the comic he kills the Mann brothers with a knife.


You know, like I do.

 

[ResonanceSD]

Also, which side would Adam Jensen be on? Seriously. I asked eidos on twitter and I'm expecting this in response.

 

[ResonanceSD]

Gentlemen?

TWO YEARS! This has been teased for TWO WHOLE YEARS

 

[Shakomaru]

Gentlemen?

TWO YEARS! This has been teased for TWO WHOLE YEARS

I saw this video a few days ago, and was astounded when it turned out to be something this massive. I think this will definitely get me to play tf2 again.

 

[Godzillarich(aka tf2godz)]

YES YES YES YES I SO FUCKING HAPPY RIGHT NOW.

 

[Fr]anc[is]

Huh, that's neat. I'm just surprised that they're still putting actual effort into TF2. Last impression I got before I quit was that they were just going to let fans do all the work from now on and shove crates down our throats until the end of time.

 

[Legendairy314]

I think valve just moved up to my favorite company. It's the simple fact that they know what the perfect balance between fan service, teasers, and proper business is. They are the only company to both drive me insane and jump for joy all within the same hour.

 

[ResonanceSD]

http://www.teamfortress.com/mvm/machines/

Huh jeez. We're screwed. I especially like the descriptions of the giant, the sentry bomb and the tank thing at the end.