The Escapist spoiler list

HT_Black

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Something occured to me several minutes ago:

Spoilers are fun.

They reveal plot twists, soil your chances of enjoying a story, and make you want to gouge out someone's eyes...Okay, maybe they're not fun.

But there sure are a lot of them-- one for every story, in fact. Sometimes, it'd be nice to be able to ruin the plot of a panned game or movie, if only to remove every motivation to play/watch it (likewise, you can get the best out of something you have no intention of ever touching).

So this thread is devoted to compiling a list of spoiled plots-- perhaps the internet's largest. If I need to tell you that a good number of plots will be spoiled if you read this, you probably aren't able to read this. All the same, please put all spoilers inside clearly denoted spoiler tags.

TL;DR: Spoilers. Write them.

Let's begin:

You're Darth Revan.
You're Andrew Ryan's test tube baby.
IT WAS HIS SLED.
 

HT_Black

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Swollen Goat said:
You should have used it.
Ah, dammit...the one time I thought I had a completely original thread, what happens?

I think my luck O'the Irish is broken.
 

HT_Black

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Swollen Goat said:
HT_Black said:
Swollen Goat said:
Ah, dammit...the one time I thought I had a completely original thread, what happens?

I think my luck O'the Irish is broken.
Dude, actually I apologize. I only did that for fun. And I didn't have any good spoilers. But I thought of one!

Kevin Spacey (Verbal) is Keyser Soze
Oh...Well alright then.

SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE! AHHH!!!1
 

GRoXERs

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Swollen Goat said:
You should have used it.
Like this one! http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.156949

In all honesty though, that thread sucked. This one can be much better.

Shit goes kaboom; Shepard lives; Saren dies; SOVEREIGN IS A REAPER OMFG
 

Satin6T

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heres a pretty good video
it ruined the usual suspects for me though
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1919638
 

Emilin_Rose

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NiGHTS DIES! WAAAAAH! THEY KILLED HIM! SEGA KILLED HIM!
Kururu is really Cherie, Cornet's mom, and she leaves for the afterlife after Cornet marries the prince.
The world ends, so the knights all die, and so does everyone else but Sonic who went back to his own world
Shadow throws up his hands and says 'to hell with the past' and beats black doom off the planet, but in the final scene he says "goodbye forever, Shadow the Hedgehog" and tosses a picture of maria and dr robotnik behind him onto the floor and walks away. He never gets his memory back and now he's just there in the series to be there without any real plot necessity, which sucks because he was an amazing character to start with and now he's really just there to appease the easily pleased of his fanbase.
 

HT_Black

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Emilin_Rose said:
NiGHTS DIES! WAAAAAH! THEY KILLED HIM! SEGA KILLED HIM!
Wait...Nights was supposed to be a he? Wow...he officialy wins the award for single most gender-ambiguous character in history.

The entire thing-- the entire trilogy is a mobius loop. The Prince begins telling the story to Farah at the end of The Two thrones, and...

easy evil said:
you will not fucking finish it…
But I already did...
 

Emilin_Rose

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HT_Black said:
Emilin_Rose said:
NiGHTS DIES! WAAAAAH! THEY KILLED HIM! SEGA KILLED HIM!
Wait...Nights was supposed to be a he? Wow...he officialy wins the award for single most gender-ambiguous character in history.
they tried to avoid pronouns for the most part, but in Will's story he does refer to NiGHTS as "he" and "him".
 

Deathkingo

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Sorry my knowledgeable brethren, but may you indulge a lesser mind's desire to learn how to make spoilers?
 

Fenring

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I think I'm the only one who knows this.
You let the jackal get away, then you kill yourself.

Deathkingo said:
Sorry my knowledgeable brethren, but may you indulge a lesser mind's desire to learn how to make spoilers?
You put [ spoiler=dfkfsdds ]words [/spoiler] but w/o spaces.
 

Beatrix

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The Heroes of Light save the world!

The Heroes of Light save the world, and actually have feelings about it!

The Heroes save the world, and now there's a romance plot with a dead girlfriend that actually doesn't come back. Awwww.

The Heroes save the future world, and then fall through time to the past so everything can become a circle, but that's alright because they somehow get back in the end and have a party.

The Heroes save the world, well, a world anyway, they didn't manage to save Terra. And Zidane looks to have died, but ends up alive after all \:eek:/

The Heroes save the world! From Sin, which is a mutated former guardian being repeatedly possessed by some old ghost that doesn't feel like not killing everything. So then the Aeons stop dreaming, making the main character that actually was part of their dream disappear, and Auron too because he happened to be dead.

The Female heroes save the world from a beetle-elephant-organ-robobehemoth piloted by the Tidus-lookalike ghost of a Yuna-lookalike that feels like destroying everything. And then Tidus comes back.

Only included the ones I finished.
 

Dusty Donuts

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Your city never ever advances technologically, and you are not God!
The Collector is stealing all the creations, but he turns out to be a big wuss and just wants friends. And then, all of YOUR friends, who have been watching you burn, spasm as you are electrified and get crushed, pop out from behind a giant Earth and tell you to buy internets.
Glados tells you how to make cake, and you blow her up with a rocket launcher after throwing her personality controller into an incinerator. Also, the Companion Cube melts into an extra life.
You commit suicide after realising that you have just wasted three hours of your life waiting for a response to your not-so-witty comment
Sorry, but that's the awful truth