The girl you like is going out with someone better

[Officer Crayon]

A girl that i really liked, is going out with someone out as of now. I was going to ask her about a month ago if she wanted to go out, but i was very hesitant. I knew that she liked one of my other friends. I also thought that she would be better with him than with me.
Im not going to put up a poll. I want to see reactions rather than just yes/no. have you ever experienced this?

 

[neonsword13-ops]

Yes, sadly. About 12 times.

I say, if they are better than me, good for them.

 

[Hiddenbane]

never had that situation, srry op. in fact, i am the better guy with my gf
feelsgoodman.jpg

 

[Capt. Crankypants]

The girl I used to love is now with someone else. I can only assume he's better than me, at least he'd better bloody be. She deserves it though. Still one of the kindest, nicest people I've known, and I didn't treat her anywhere near as well enough as I should.

But that's not entirely the topic I guess. I've never been in a position where the girl I've fancied is dating someone else, nicer or otherwise, although this could be because if I find out/notice a girl has a boyfriend, I'm no longer interested. I never want to steal someone's girl away. Also, to be honest, I'm pretty selective about my girls, and I don't fancy that many. There's always a few who catch my attention though.

Girls are so nice.

 

[demoman_chaos]

There is a reason I have a war axe. There is no one who is better than the man with the big axe, except Bruce Lee and a lot of other people who are in fact better than the man with the big axe.

 

[Cyberdelic]

Yes I have. I regretted it for a while, now I'm with my current partner and I'm glad that I didn't get with him at the time. It's a wonderful thing hindsight - clears the fog that infatuation blinds us with to reveal the truth.

 

[FalloutJack]

There is no such animal.

But just in case I am wrong and that ego is to blame, I'm just going to say that no such thing has happened to me at this time. In your case, if you love her, support and help her in her times of need. Be there for her and do not stray from the path. For even if you two are not joined as one, being the one she can count on is a good close second.

 

[dorkette1990]

Yes, this has happened and it made me incredibly sad. I was in a three person relationship (a guy, a girl, me), and I was falling for her - hard. I was already in love with the guy, and he decided he didn't want to date her, so he broke up with her for the both of us (at the time, he didn't want to share me, unless he was also with my other partner... different scenario now ). She's dating someone else now, but she seems happier... and she deserves it. Doesn't mean I don't hate the guy and miss her, though.

 

[iay]

Ok I only just registered to answer this thread. Listen and listen carefully. No one is better than you, just different. You are going to waste a lot of your life worrying about judging yourself and others if you think like that. If you had asked and she had said no then you look for the next girl, her loss. Seriously too many regrets and over thinking is going to haunt you for the rest of your life.

 

[Blazer Miles]

Rather shamedly, yes, this has happened to me; Only I wouldn't reccomend what I did to deal with it. The guy was better than me in every way and (though at the time i didn't realise it) probably better suited, but being myself, I made a massively overcomplicated plan to completely trump every single nice thing he'd ever done for her, spoke a speech off the top of my head that was as convincing as [insert really convincing person here] and romantically (ridiculously so) asked her out at the end of it. She said yes, but I still don't think it was the best choice of action

 

[qazmatoz]

Step one, don't believe anyone is better than you. No girl is going to be attracted to you if you if you go around thinking that you're the lesser man.

 

[SwagLordYoloson]

If a woman I am attracted to isn't single, she is always going to be with somebody better than me. Doesn't matter if the guy's a violent wife-beater, he's still going to be better than I am. This is one of those reasons why I don't ask women out. Any woman who is attracted to me is at the least deluded and more likely insane.

Well there is your problem, if you don't respect and like yourself, no one else will...

 

[Sacman]

Yep, pretty much everyone I've ever had a crush on... they just deserve better than me, so they're better off...

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

Then become better and win her back, come on, what sort of man are ya!?

 

[Radelaide]

A girl that i really liked, is going out with someone out as of now. I was going to ask her about a month ago if she wanted to go out, but i was very hesitant. I knew that she liked one of my other friends. I also thought that she would be better with him than with me.
Im not going to put up a poll. I want to see reactions rather than just yes/no. have you ever experienced this?

How is he better than you? Like, in what ways? Because to me it just sounds like you're feeling sorry for yourself and that's not attractive in any way.

You should tell the girl that you're upset he beat you to it, but you're happy for her. Don't try to "win" her or anything. It's most likely just going to get your head smashed in from her boyfriend. Let her come to you.

No one is better than you in any situation. Self-esteem is built on inflated ego, whether it's worthy or not. Never let anyone tell you different.

 

[Officer Crayon]

There is no such animal.

But just in case I am wrong and that ego is to blame, I'm just going to say that no such thing has happened to me at this time. In your case, if you love her, support and help her in her times of need. Be there for her and do not stray from the path. For even if you two are not joined as one, being the one she can count on is a good close second.

:O wow. thats awesome

 

[LiraelG]

Can I ask why you thought she'd be better with him rather than you? What makes him better?

Unless you're nasty and/or would neglect her, I doubt he's better. He just may be more well suited. Since she likes him, she probably think he is. She may be proven wrong...

Relationships are more about compatibility rather than it being a case where 'the best man or woman wins.' So try not to feel too unhappy! Better things will come along for you; a girl with whom everything will just fall into place. The only difficulty is finding her!

As for having experienced this... I have insofar as an ex dated someone new a week after our relationship. I was still hung up over them. I didn't feel too bad about it... I just let their new relationship run its course and hoped that everything would fall back into place soon, even if that meant me meeting someone else. It took a while, but it did! (And by that point I had already dated said ex again and found out that we weren't compatible and he was actually rather boring...)