The Killing Game

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Eggsnham

New member
Apr 29, 2009
4,052
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Each person has to come up with a motive and plan for killing the Escapist above them and then a reason why they should not be killed.

I'll start this off:

I kill the next Escapist for being so unpredictably there.

I'm going to sneak into his house at night and kill him with an icicle.

Don't kill me! I have Schizophrenia.
 

Neonbob

The Noble Nuker
Dec 22, 2008
25,564
0
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For a while now, Eggsnham has been shaking. This shaking is making the Earth quake. I am the only person who realizes this, and so I have to do the dirty work. I shall kidnap him, and strap him down very tightly. These restraints will keep him from shaking outwardly. Inside, however, the vibrations will start to shake him apart, eventually causing him to explode. It will be glorious.

You can't kill me! Only I can stop the infestation!
 

Eggsnham

New member
Apr 29, 2009
4,052
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Neonbob said:
For a while now, Eggsnham has been shaking. This shaking is making the Earth quake. I am the only person who realizes this, and so I have to do the dirty work. I shall kidnap him, and strap him down very tightly. These restraints will keep him from shaking outwardly. Inside, however, the vibrations will start to shake him apart, eventually causing him to explode. It will be glorious.

You can't kill me! Only I can stop the infestation!
No.. NO! I.. I killed you on this incredibly flawed forum game! I KILLED YOU!
 

Neonbob

The Noble Nuker
Dec 22, 2008
25,564
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Eggsnham said:
No.. NO! I.. I killed you on this incredibly flawed forum game! I KILLED YOU!
Eggsnham said:
Each person has to come up with a motive and plan for killing the Escapist above them and then a reason why they should not be killed.
AAAAUGH!
MY BRAAAAAIN!
stoppit!
Yer gonna make it explode!
DAMMITALL!
 

Dr.Susse

Lv.1 NPC
Apr 17, 2009
16,498
2
43
Neonbob was at first praised for his whale nukeing but sadly the whales? using an large assemblance of krill and carbon credits paid for an assassin which was ME.

You can't kill what dosen't exist, freakout.
 

Fury Is Me.

Oh, Tasty Tasty.
Feb 20, 2010
25,443
0
41
Dr. susse wakes up in a dark room lit up by only one flickering bulb, hanging by the wires, abovee him. He's trapped in a chair and a stinging pain is in the back of his head. a screen lowers down and my face shows up on screen. "I want to play a gamee with you." The flood lights flash on revieling that the room is large with metallic walls. There's a metal door on both sides. "As you can see, this room has two doors. One leads to freedom, the other leads to indescribable death. You have 1 hour to escape from your chair and leave the room... Or else." the ceiling opens and a ceiling of spikes shoots down and hangs on the ceiling. "The time beginnnnnnsss.... NOW!" The screen flips to a timer counting down from 60:00 and the spiked ceiling begins lowering VERY slowly. Dr. susse begins to panic and writhe in the chair. After 45 minutes of strugling, the cuffs finally weakened enough for him to slide out of them. The clock read 14:54, and the ceiling was much lower than before. Dr. susse panics, contemplating which door to take. He choose the Southern door, Big mistake. As soon as the door was opened, a dart coated in nerve poison shot into his arm and he fell to the ground immediatly. His body felt like it was on fire and he could only squirm and drool on the floor. He waited there watching the clock count down to 0:00, crying, until the spike ceiling immediatly feel and crushed him. The ceiling raises and I flicker back on the screen in the wall. "Ahhhh. That was fun. That's for being a ninja."

You can't kill me! I'm only a puppet!
 

Tiny116

The Cheerful Pessimist
May 6, 2009
2,222
0
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Oh my! a puppet! Dispelga liked to try and pretend to be inanimate unforchantly Tiny likes to cut things up with his light saber....oh dear thats a sizzling mess on the floor right there.
...
Not much left of Dispelga anymore

You can't kill me I'll use Jedi mind tricks on you!
 

Toriver

Lvl 20 Hedgehog Wizard
Jan 25, 2010
1,364
0
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Only those Jedi mind-tricks won't work on me! Tiny116 is actually a Sith lord anyway and must be destroyed.

Oh, what's this over here? It's my transmogrifier gun! I'll just set it for "goldfish" and transmogrify him into a goldfish, and then feed you to my hungry tiger buddy over here!

Don't kill me! I'm just a kid! I didn't mean to hammer nails into the coffee table!!!
 

Tiny116

The Cheerful Pessimist
May 6, 2009
2,222
0
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But as you so kindly pointed put i'm a sith lord, killing children is a part of the job description.
*Lightning crackles*

Who am I kidding theres a perfectly good combine harvister to throw you under.
..
...
SPLAT

Toriver mash anyone?

Don't kill me i gave you mash!
 

oppp7

New member
Aug 29, 2009
7,043
0
0
I force-feed you the MASH DvDs and then set you on fire.

Don't kill me I have cancer!
 

Tiny116

The Cheerful Pessimist
May 6, 2009
2,222
0
0
I'm agry you used the cancer card!
but it's ok.
I loped off you noggin' with my light saber to give you a quicker less painful death.

Don't kill me I only act in mercy!
 

Ironic Pirate

New member
May 21, 2009
5,541
0
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Mercy is people justifying sadism. I blow off each off tiny tim's limbs (rhyme!) with a shotgun firing acidic buckshot. I leave him to be slowly dissolved.

Don't kill me! Only I know the secret path to Atlantis! No, Dave, what are you doing? Stop it Dave. Sttooooooooooppp iiittttt DDDDDDDDaaaaaaaaaavvvvveeee...
 

Fury Is Me.

Oh, Tasty Tasty.
Feb 20, 2010
25,443
0
41
I write another long, elaborate SAW reference.

You can't kill me! I am the great Leon!
 

Tiny116

The Cheerful Pessimist
May 6, 2009
2,222
0
0
I'm Death
And dropped a piano on your head

You can't kill me, you just can't
 

Eggsnham

New member
Apr 29, 2009
4,052
0
0
Tiny116 said:
I'm Death
And dropped a piano on your head

You can't kill me, you just can't
Dante's Inferno begs to differ.

I kill you with your own weapons and then steal your scythe and proceed to go on a journey through hell to save some chick.

I'm Dante, I killed death. I have his scythe, you can't kill me.
 

Fury Is Me.

Oh, Tasty Tasty.
Feb 20, 2010
25,443
0
41
I'm a Belmont, i've killed death before.

I'm a Belmont, an ancient vampire slayer. You can't win.