The most awkward moment you can remember

[ChildishLegacy]

Any time I try to speak to a group of people larger than 4 pretty much.

In my Maths class we were picking groups to write up revision notes or some shit, I was one of the people that were picking people.

I wasn't paying attention so I asked my teacher who was left, he replied with: [Girl] [Guy] [Guy] [Guy whos name he replaced with the female version as a joke]
I tried to carry on with the joke and said "We'll take the girl then!", forgetting about the initial girl. I get the feeling I offended the girl when I said I meant the final guy after the initial awkwardness of me saying that too.

Just every time I open my mouth in situations like that (which is rarely), I just assert myself more as this awkward, quiet person and I'm really not when I get to know people/am paying a bit more attention. Gaah.

Oh, and having a conversation with some friend I hadn't seen in years about hentai. God knows how that happened.

 

[Eamar]

I was staying with my boyfriend over the Easter university holiday and one of his friends (who I vaguely know but wouldn't really call my friend) came to hang out. We'd been sat around chatting for a while when he says "so, are you going to put that away at some point?" Turns out we'd left a butt plug out on a side table after using it earlier and had both completely forgotten about it. Red faces all round.

 

[NegaWiki]

Texting example, but not what you think.
I was in history class talking to my friend "X". He told me about a genre of manga called yuri. I didn't know what that meant so I texted my friend "C". She told me. Then X and I texted our friend "T", who wants to buy a harem game. Eventually the texts turned into a competition to out gross each other so I sent him something I don't even want to post.
I sent it to C, T, my freshmen friend G, junior friend O and my girlfriend.
The one time auto correct would have been a Godsend.

 

[CardinalPiggles]

At work my friend mentioned he thought mushrooms taste like cum, everyone turned around and just kind of stopped for a second because he's straight (as far as we know, he could be bisexual), but in those few seconds it was pretty damn awkward.

 

[Johnny Impact]

I don't remember what grade I was in, 7th maybe, but one time this girl decided it would be the absolute pinnacle of humor to write a very long, very bad poem about me masturbating in public, and then read said poem in front of me and over 100 students.

Still not sure why she did it. I wasn't sure of her name, had never looked at her, and wasn't in any of the same classes. Up to that point I had only been marginally aware she even existed. I hadn't offended her or any of her friends that I know of.

As I was already a pariah -- a skinny, shy, acne-riddled, braces-bedecked, Coke-bottle-glasses-wearing, 99th percentile academic geek -- there wasn't anywhere further down the social ladder than the space I already occupied.

I couldn't put it in words then, but it was as if I had just seen someone take a running start and punt a puppy like the Olympic Puppy-Kicking medal was on the line. There simply couldn't be any justification.

Anyway, this spectacularly awful prank turned into a series of jokes and insults that lasted all the way through senior year. I'm sure I'd still be taking shit for it today if I had any contact with former classmates.

 

[Camembert]

*sigh* My mom caught me masturbating. Jeeeeeeeezus. I cringe even remembering it, and it was 7 years ago.

My father heard me masturbating, not sure if that's worse (I'm female). While getting out of the bath once I nearly fell, making quite a racket as I scrambled to save myself from smashing my face on the radiator, and when I next spoke to my dad I said, 'Did you hear me nearly fall out of the bath?'

With a raised eyebrow he replied, 'I heard a lot of things'

-__-

 

[inutaisho7996]

When I was in Health Class in high school, our teacher had a box in the back of the room that we could anonymously put questions we had about sex into so that she could answer them at the end of the sex-ed portion of the class. When she was answering them, she pulled out the next question and one of the science teachers opened the door to the classroom just in time to hear her say "Why do boys masturbate more than girls?". Every one turned and looked at him as he stood in the door way in stunned silence for several seconds, and then he said "A...am I supposed to answer that?" After he talked to our teacher about what the wanted to talk to her about, he stopped at the door on his way out and said "Good luck with your lesson topic today."


I was in another class, and the whole class when silent just in time for us all to hear one of the guys say "I don't want any girl I'm having sex with reading during sex...unless she's reading a comic book...to me." Then he realized that everyone in the room was staring at him and he said "Uh...what conversation wasn't for all of you to hear."

 

[The Ubermensch]

So there was a really nice girl at my school, and she was always kind when I was depressed (all the time).

One day, I was really pissed off. Really really angry about something. I'd also had a hair-cut the day before, so she, to lighten the mood, said "Oh, I like your haircut." I, being the incredibly witty and nice guy I am, said "No, that's just the chemotherapy". She never spoke to me again.

Then, about a week later, her mum died of cancer, which she'd been struggling with for ages.
I died inside.
I'm still dead inside.
Oh dear God I'm a horrible person.

Life is pain bro, it makes the good parts all the more enjoyable.

You didn't mean it, and you regret it. You made a mistake and it happens.

*Hugs*

Now I hate to see some one with potential of such EPIC proportions to stop trolling. You're not living until you've pissed someone off enough that they try to take a swing at you. GET OUT THERE AND TROLL ON!

*Slaps on the arse*

 

[The Ubermensch]

*sigh* My mom caught me masturbating. Jeeeeeeeezus. I cringe even remembering it, and it was 7 years ago.

My father heard me masturbating, not sure if that's worse (I'm female). While getting out of the bath once I nearly fell, making quite a racket as I scrambled to save myself from smashing my face on the radiator, and when I next spoke to my dad I said, 'Did you hear me nearly fall out of the bath?'

With a raised eyebrow he replied, 'I heard a lot of things'

-__-

My Mum walked in on me, but I was drunk at the time... and I don't remember it too well

There was this other time where I was trying to Jack it and she kept coming into my room with laundry and shit. How I didn't get caught then I'll never know. Oh and just FYI, I was having insomnia at the time... It helps

Capcha: Whistle and Flute

 

[Queen Michael]

It happened esterday, at the gay pride parade in GOthenburg, Sweden. It was starting, and people were marching away, but when about a fifth of the parade had started walking away, we noticed that the rest wasn't moving. pparently, they hadn't been lined up properly or something, so the first fifth wasn't connected to the rest. The rest of us just stood there, not certain what to do, as the first fifth kept walking away. I jumped out of my spot and went to them, since I was darn determined that I would march. Luckily, the rest of the people eventually caught up.

 

[Freaky Lou]

The most awkward thing I can remember is so embarrassing I can feel my very soul cringe back from the memory when I think about it, as such I will not speak of it here.

It involved an ex-girlfriend and a case of mistaken identity, that is all I will say.

Now that you've basically said what this was in another thread, I can tell you I had the same thing happen, and yes, that'd be my own most awkward moment as well!

 

[IrishBerserker]

I was in my Grade 12 Law class and I overheard one of the other students ask how you break someone?s neck. So being rather knowledgeable about certain military tactics, I pipe-up and give an impromptu lesson on how to silently break a persons neck. Also adding some tips on how to effectively cut a persons throat and jab a knife behind someone's ear into the brain for a quick silent kill. With some demonstrations on my friend sitting beside me.

This lesson lasted about five minutes and afterward there was a pause, then the same student asked me how I knew all of that and I couldn't effectively answer that. I got some weird looks for the rest of that class.

 

[Helmholtz Watson]

snip

Ugh...your story...my god.

OP: At a previous job I worked at all of the female coworkers were crowded around this one cell phone and I was curious to see what they were looking at and.....someone's boyfriend had sent a pic of their dick. I felt so awkward and quickly left. X(

 

[dudycat1]

me and my girlfriend having to be in the same room as my brother when he broke to our parents that he got his girlfriend pregnant, and then having to be the room while both my mum and my dad went apeshit and screamed at my brother basically forcing both me and my girlfriend into sitting there in silence for about 30 minutes while my brother was screamed at. that was horribly awkward and ended in me apologizing to my girlfriend about 10 times.

 

[Spoonius]

I slept in my mum

I can see how that might be awkward.

 

[MorganL4]

A colleague once turned to me and said "You have a jew nose."
And see as we were being politically incorrect I said "No I have a n*gg*r nose." (it's fat, not long)
She then replied, "I'm half African."

She told me not to worry about it but I just felt like a douche whenever I was around her from then on.

She was racist first, therefore you should be even

 

[Cheeseman Muncher]

As far as awkward moments go I've had quite a few but since I was fairly drunk during most of these I can't really remember them. The worst one that I can remember is about 5 years ago with my younger brother almost walking in on me and my girlfriend at the time.

He then went and looked through the bin for used condoms. -_- And told my mum. He got 10 shades of shit ripped out of him for trying to embarrass me (and being frankly weird) but didn't make it any less awkward.

 

[smithy_2045]

The most awkward moment I've had was trying to tell a girl that I really liked her. Worded it horribly, she didn't reciprocate, and we had classes together for the rest of the day...

 

[Relish in Chaos]

Oh, I remembered another. It was at a party on the same field as the awkward moment I mentioned before, but it happened a couple of weeks prior. I'd had way too much whiskey to drink and spent a good part of the evening chasing after another drunk girl who thought I was trying to rape her. I think I recall saying a lot of things like "loving her until the end of time" and I had to be wrestled down by a lot of people while screaming her name.

Still, I'm not sure if that's as bad as something that happened to my other friend at the most recent field party, where she'd drunk way too much, vomited on the grass, kept on screaming my friend's name and badgering him for cigarettes, and then passed out while her boyfriend and friends tried to drag her back to a friend's house. And now my friend whose name she kept on shouting has gotten it in his head that she fancies him because of that, and is waiting for her to dump him (since, according to him, they don't seem happy and he didn't even entirely look after until the end after she was drunk and vomiting) so that he can ask her out.

Maybe I'm going to sound like a dick for saying this, but I hope she knocks him back 'cos I'd be pissed if I had yet another friend who I once had something to share but now spends a lot of his time with his girlfriend, and I have to stomach them holding hands, hugging from behind, and kissing while I stand there like a fucking moron. Oh, and this is after my crush has now kind of start having a casual "friends with benefits"-type deal with my other friend, who doesn't know what the fuck he wants and had previously been juggling her and another girl due to his apparently high sex drive and inability to make mature decisions.

 

[Lunatic High]

THE most awkward experience to date for myslef was 4-5 years ago. Me and a new girlfriend I'd only known for lik 4-5 months were out drinking, not VERY drunk mind you but to the degree you don't notice little things going on around or happening to you. Anyway we went to bed back at my apartment and I was like half way finnished eating her out when someone knocked on the door I got up to answer it and it was my sister and a couple of her friends, heres the awkward part my girlfriend was apparently in "mid flow" and long story short I failed to tell a convincing lie to my sister and her friends as to why I had blood all over my mouth and chin and a little on my hands. My girlfriend was traumatized, my sister was traumatized tho it didn't stop my sister from telling every fucking member of my immediate family about it the next day.

2 lessons: 1. NEVER drink and then have sex with the lights off.
2. NEVER answer the door in mid nasty.