The Most Random Story Thread

[Eumersian]

I thought this might be fun for some people. My goal is to let all users of the Escapist contribute to the generation of a story that has no plot, main characters, or direction. I want to see where it goes, and what ends up happening.

The following are not parameters, but suggestions:
-No Novels: Posts shouldn't be more than a few sentences, a paragraph at the most. This is because I don't want somebody who had the same idea as you be left out because you posted a 500 word essay about absolutely nothing in particular.
-Keep It Clean: I don't want any posts to be particularly vulgar. You can post a hardcore porn scene if you want, but that's not what this thread is about. This also includes slurs and sailor-talk used sparingly.
-Pictures: Should be kept in spoilers so they won't clutter the page.
-Style: You don't have to be grammatically correct, but use capitals and sentences and punctuation as if you were writing a real story.

The following is a parameter:
-No Trolling: I beseech upon all honest posters that they may report any post that they find to possess any of the qualities of a troll post. I will probably take part in this myself.

I want this to be fun for everybody, so don't be jerk.

Now to start:

John was lost in the forest. It was a particularly ugly forest where the bacon cleaners were unlike any other windows the youngsters had ever seen. Everything was happy and the sleepy town of M'ghel'Dur'Kish was prosperous. That was when the hex shows up.

 

[newfoundsky]

The hex was a fine hex, as far as hexes go. But the one thing it lacked was a tumble dryer in heat because the mushroom was spayed before the comet drank the kool-aid. The hex made all things dark.

 

[Trivun]

Things that make sense are often, by their very nature, non-sensical. Such was the state of his mind whenever he saw her. But it was odd that his non-sensical mind should become so non-sensical when, despite all that, he could think about her in the way he did. The more alarming thing, of course, and most non-sensical of all, was that she was, in fact, a very mangy cat.

 

[Frequen-Z]

and then one day Forum Games will actually be posted in the Forum Games section, and Frequen-Z will live happily ever after.

 

[Bobby Newmark]

But things were not all sunshine and puppy farts in Turnip Town, particularly for the queen's royal eunuchs. Often they'd lament their chosen lifestyle to random wanderers wearing porkpie hats. After all, a eunuch's life is hard, you know?

 

[Zap Rowsdower]

So the people of The United Federalist Capitalist Communist Democratic Republic of Rand McNally looked in awe at the oncoming wave of particles. These particles had gotten there because of the movement of their adjacent particles, and their adjacent particles, which, after several trillion particles, had been moved by a lone butterfly.

 

[Sleekgiant]

So I was playing Pokemon in the backseat and I was all like "OH BALLS A SHINEY PIDGEY" then my dad beat me. Afterwards we walked the dinosaur, the end.