The stereotypical human

[Keava]

Depending on the looks, size and estimated strength of the said alien, first thing id attempt to do is capture it instead explaining how our race works.
Then id eventually tell him, we are mostly idiots, but cruel idiots nonetheless and unless he grants me three wishes i'll sell him to circus where he will spend the rest of his miserable existence as a clown.

I'm pretty sure not long after we would get invaded, but hell, worth a try.

 

[Velvo]

"Mostly Harmless" Yes, I went there.

We were just "Harmless" until Ford came round and tacked on the "Mostly."

 

[Pegghead]

Average eh, well let's see now. I suppose if you took up the numbers of people and paid special attention to all the saints, selflessly wonderful people, nice blokes, jerks, violently dictatorial despots that eat babies and those insidious telemarketers, took down characteristics on some kind of scale and then divided it all You'd probably end up with...

A person who could stand to lose a few kilos, in their 30's, Asian, male, law abiding, has a sense of morality, is part of the Christian faith, would speak a Chinese dialect, would have had a full education, may occasionally smoke, would occasionally drink, would be capable of violence, occasionally does things negatively and most importantly like bacon.

I actually did some research into this and half of this information was either disjointed or hard to get, you wouldn't believe how mad I am at the...urgh, misanthropists who just posted "tHey wood be fAt and eev1l and eat babbiies nd suck hurr hurr hurr".

 

[JonnoStrife]

We are complex, yet we are stupid. We are group orientated,yet we are selfish. We are the personification of paradox. We nailed our God to a cross. We are really only here to prove that every rose has a thorn.

 

[Addendum_Forthcoming]

Well that depends on the possible motivations WHY an alien would come to Earth and ask about us...

I'd probably lie saying that the average human has mastered medicine and war. We have destroyed all aliens before us with our genetically enhanced psionic soldier class of Humans that exist in isolation in hidden enclaves just waiting to defend the Earth from possible threats from beyond the stars.

At the very least it might scare off a possible assault and may make the aliens more interested in trading with us than blowing us apart and taking our planet.

 

[Lem0nade Inlay]

I shoot it make up a racist name abuse it and put into slavery.
And thats what humans are like

The movie district 9 comes to me all of a sudden....

 

[RIOgreatescapist]

Dunno bout other species, but check out mah wang! over 9000 inches HUHUHAUHUAHUAHHAUAHUh

 

[Natdaprat]

We tend to have two eyes, a nose, a mouth, two ears and other useless crap. Harvest us.

 

[Nickisimo]

I would tell him that I'm a spy.

But...yeah, humans are selfish, hopeless, fallen, etc. Move along, good sir, move along. Nice spaceship, btw.

 

[Ironic Pirate]

Impulsive, reckless, and weak, aliens would be able take over... shit.

I mean, badass, and excellant warriors, and, uh...