There is a Spider on your shoulder

[Peter Langdijk]

Hi how are you........dont look..... there is a spider on your shoulder.
When you move it will run to your ear and eat your brains (i think).
What do you do?
Think quickly, if you think to long the spider will become mad and it will eat one of your vital organs.

 

[The Night Shade]

Squash it with my fist

 

[El Poncho]

Squish it with my hand? Nothing else to do.

 

[OrenjiJusu]

ill do what i usually do, shake like a dog and swat at my shoulder, hoping to both dislodge it and hit it, and then try to squish it.

 

[Turbo_Destructor]

there is an error in your grammar.

in response to your question, just quickly brush it off

 

[TheGuiggleMonster]

I would challenge him to a game of tennis and when he least expects it my friends will ambush him from behind and capture him in a glass jar. After capturing him, he will undergo hours of intense torture until he reveals what his plans were and how many other poisonous spiders there are in my house and their locations. I will attach an electronic device around his neck that will explode whenever he disobeys what I say. I will order him to lure the other spiders out of my house and onto the tennis court where they will also be ambushed and captured in glass jars. I will then burn down my house to make sure that there are no other spiders hiding there. Every spider will have their own electronic device attached and I will train them to become my obedient minions. Firstly, they will build me a new house and then proceed to carry out my evil plans of world domination. MUHAHAHAHAHA!

 

[Someone Depressing]

wait, there's "An" Spider on my shoulder? So you mean an AAAGHSPIDER!!!!

I'm pretty sure they're not dangerous. I'd run like a maniac into a gravel pit and try to roll it off.

 

[wolf thing]

train it to be my minion. and use it to rule the world

 

[DanielBrown]

My reaction would be something like this;

Spoiler: Holy shit, that was a huge picture!

Then I'd start spazzing about and eventually die when the spider eats my brains.

 

[Graevan]

"I know. This is Jerry my pet jumping spider that i caught while backpacking through the congo. He's very good at keeping mosquitos away and very useful when dealing with street marketers. Would you like a demonstration? Jerry, STRIKE!"

This is what I wish I could say but unfortunatley Jerry is just your standard grade tarantula with no meaningful leaping capabilities, yet. Training continues...

 

[Jedamethis]

Tell it to get the fuck off my shoulder or I end it's puny little life.

3.

2.

*SPLAT*

My finger slipped.

 

[Angerwing]

Squash it against my shoulder with the side of my head. Your move spider.

 

[Beryl77]

I'd shoot it with a gun.

 

[dancinginfernal]

Flail like an idiot before running out of the room and burning down my home.

Y'know, the usual.

 

[Brotherofwill]

I would use an hand to quickly brush an spider away from my shoulder, which is an part of my body I couldn't care less about, but then the spider couold be an-noyed and anttack me with an insult.

 

[linwolf]

The thing I do whenever I see a spider study how it looks and what it's doing until I get tired of it and then continue with what I was doing before I started observing it.

 

[Connor Lonske]

Put hand near it, let it go on, then put it in the bathroom which has flies.

Why kill spiderbros? They kill bugs and aren't afraid of anything.

 

[[.redacted]]

Nothing else to do but...

Set myself on fire and see if the spider likes me now!

Ahahaha! Now what, Spider?!

 

[Scarim Coral]

Simple I would take my jacket off as quickly as possible and run out of my room like a madman.

 

[DoctorObviously]

Hah! A spider you say? That critter is no match for my Super Beam Laser Cannons that are installed in both my ear canals!