Ubisoft's Teen Actor Murder Simulator Due in June

[SonicWaffle]

This actually sounds like an interesting premise for an adventure game, but those things are 'old' and 'boring' nowadays so it'll probably be a generic top down shooter or something.

I can't see it working as a point-and-click TBH. 'Walk to table' - 'Pick up ' - 'Use on ' seems a bit too clunky and slow for a game about a violent deathmatch.

I think it might make a good third-person shooter though, depending on how it's done. If they made it like Battle Royale it would probably be fun, running around an island full of forgotten child stars and offing one another for the chance of another 15 minutes of fame.

Still, we all know that everyone is going to pick up on the "Teen murder simulator" part and the media will shit their collective pants.

 

[ActionDan]

This does not seem like a good game to prove to people that every teenager is not a blood lusting sociopatch on the verge of of going to the nearest school and shooting everyone.

 

[Proteus214]

Sounds like a good time!

(sees Ubisoft is behind it)

Oh...forget it then. That's a dealbreaker for me.

 

[Lullabye]

Maybe we can unlock special, current teen actor characters. to be, or kill.
Oh Beiber, how I wish I could murder you.......

 

[Andronicus]

Oh gawd. You can bet on the media picking two things out of something like this: Teens (you know, like kids, but more violent?) and Murder.

Actually, from a totally objective point of view, it really doesn't sound all that nice at all. It's pretty much glorifying the idea of adolescents murdering other people in order to further their own career. It has "Banned in Australia" written all over it. I'm all for more mature themes in videogames, but I don't think this is sending quite the right sort of message, regardless of the obviously tongue-in-cheek humour it revels in. Just my opinion.

 

[bladester1]

all I can say is "Da fuck?"

 

[Sovvolf]

I'd think it was going to be more "Point and click" then an action game... though I'm probably wrong.

 

[Optimus Hagrid]

This actually sounds like an interesting premise for an adventure game, but those things are 'old' and 'boring' nowadays so it'll probably be a generic top down shooter or something.

I can't see it working as a point-and-click TBH. 'Walk to table' - 'Pick up ' - 'Use on ' seems a bit too clunky and slow for a game about a violent deathmatch.

Which is why you design the puzzles with a degree of ingenuity[1], instead of "pick up knife stab stab derp".

Sabotaging fan forums, causing fans to revolt violently against their (now apparently Hitler-worshipping) idol? Or changing the lead role to something that goes against an actor's principles (eg. Barry Sportspresenter from Yorshire's role has changed from the family-value respecting coal miner to a homosexual Muslim from Lancashire)? Oh, I don't bloody know, I'm no adventure game writer.

[1]See: Day of the Tentacle

 

[Evil the White]

If the Johnas Brothers are able to be beating to death with bats, I am SOLD.

I want the whole Disney cast. Failing that, at least Cyrus for crimes against music.

Lets just see how Ubisoft fuck us with this release.

 

[VanityGirl]

Sounds like a Bloody Good Time!

...
That was a horrible pun, I feel ashamed.

 

[ShadowsofHope]

..I have a very bad feeling about this. Like I did when I read the name "Michael Bay", and consequently suffered a childhood raping.

Oh Ubisoft.. must you?

 

[Antari]

You all have fun with Ubisoft's DRM now. Don't come crying to us when it hurts you.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

This sounds incredibly stupid.

 

[Mydnyght]

I smell another "25 to Life" incident.
In other words, I bet this will turn out just like 25 to Life:

--Angry people protest about it.
--Jack Thompson wants it destroyed.
--Game turns out to be a total piece of fucking shit anyway.

 

[dfphetteplace]

A PC release as well you say?

Coming soon from Ubisoft DRM dpt.: Multirom! You must have 2 phsyical discs in the drive at any given time to keep the game running. They must be stacked up, and for added safety, one must be inverted over the other. Also you must voodoo chant before a microphone to activate your copy of the game, each and every time you wish to play. The chant is randomly generated each time to a heavily encrypted and monthly updated algorithm, and the servers to which you must always be connected will not transmit data until every syllable has been uttered. If at any time 1 of the 2 discs stops rotating, the game will uninstall itself, along with any other Ubisoft game located in the registry of you and anyone on your homegroup.

Good premise for a game, but the public's outcry over Ubisoft DRM will make the PC version a tough sell, to say the least.

--This has been a satire by Robot--

Do NOT give them any ideas, damnit!

 

[Doclector]

Hmm...satire, murder, and the corpses of annoying teen actors? Sounds like heaven.