Challenge: In Quake Live, join a public game of Instagib Free For All (doesn't require much any game knowledge really) or regular FFA if there's no players on Australian servers. Wait until the start of a fresh round before joining the match. Winner is whoever gets a better frags to deaths ratio (meaning trying to hide away is a valid strategy). The matches usually last 15 minutes or until anyone's reached 50 frags.
It's also possible to set up your personal server if you can find someone with a subscription (I've got one: my e-mail is horsmaan at hotmail dot com) for a good ole one-on-one with any silly settings and win conditions you prefer. The FFA idea is probably at its funniest if you manage to get on a server with really good players...