Venting

[ProZack]

I have been holding this is for a couple of months, and have become increasingly frustrated that I have no where to vent, so I decided to just at least type it out.

I have a boring monotonous life. My ideals are never challenged by hardship, nothing to strengthen my character, the same old shit, day in and day out. I can quite literally give you a schedule of my life for the past year. I absolutely hate it. I'd much rather at the least have suffering, pain, anything. At least with those you have a struggle to get over with.

I'm an emotionless shell of a man. If I woke up tomorrow with all my family dead, I wouldn't give a single fuck. My grandma died a couple months ago, a person who raised me since I was born, who always gave me smiles, and I didn't shed a single tear. I wasn't holding them back either, they just weren't there.

I have no will to live, save a single thing. A girl who lives approximately 2,000 miles away, the only friend I really have, and I'll probably never see her in my life. She hardly talks to me now, and in hindsight, I should have seen this coming from miles away.

I'm fucking tired of it all. I want to get my life in order, but what life do I have? If I died only a handful of people would care, but I couldn't care less about those people.

I hate feeling like I'm the only one going through this, because I know someone else went through this too.

 

[Andrew Record]

If you really didn't care, and felt as though your life had no meaning, you simply wouldn't have made a forum post about it. You're just pretending to be apathetic, when in reality you are hoping that this might foster a faint glimmer of attention or hope. Do what most adults do, suck it up or step off the ride mate

EDIT: and by step off the ride, i don't mean suicide, that's never a good option, i merely mean, keep doing what you are still doing. Advice is one thing, however i think that when you post on a forum you either genuinely want help, or you are just wanting sympathy. Mayhap talking to your parents about this might lead to finding out if these feelings are hereditary or not.

 

[ZeroMachine]

Your name leads me to believe you're on antidepressants? So... do you have a depression problem? You should talk to a psychologist/psychiatrist.

And if you hate your life, change it. Do something different. Find a new job or career. Follow one of your passions.

 

[ZeroMachine]

If you really didn't care, and felt as though your life had no meaning, you simply wouldn't have made a forum post about it. You're just pretending to be apathetic, when in reality you are hoping that this might foster a faint glimmer of attention or hope. Do what most adults do, suck it up or step off the ride mate

Wow. Ok. So... yeah. How about this- when someone asks for help and vents about something, DON'T assume they're doing it as a childish grab for attention and DON'T be rude.

Seriously, dude. Uncalled for.

 

[Esotera]

If you really didn't care, and felt as though your life had no meaning, you simply wouldn't have made a forum post about it. You're just pretending to be apathetic, when in reality you are hoping that this might foster a faint glimmer of attention or hope. Do what most adults do, suck it up or step off the ride mate

Absolutely this, minus the stepping off. Identify what you want to change in your life, make a plan for how you're going to tackle problems, then do it.

Also, people's reactions to grief are different. I don't care when my relatives die either, you shouldn't feel bad about it. There was a thread here a few days ago where lots of people admitted this.

Life is what you make of it...set some challenges, write it down, and don't feel disappointed with things you don't achieve...no-one gets 100% of what they want done. Aim for 100%, get 80% done.

 

[Andrew Record]

@ ZeroMachine

My post wasn't intended to be rude. I apologize if you took it that way, however i think that you are missing the point. In the start of his post, he stated that he was venting about how his life sucks, how he wouldn't care if his family died, and how he only cares about a person who hardly talks to him, and how he wishes his life was better. I honestly feel that pop culture nowadays fosters a feeling of emptiness and apathy in most people, and i'm honestly sick of hearing about it. I'm not trying to forum hijack, or steal his thunder, i simply believe that if he truly was so unhappy and un-fulfilled he would be doing something about it. Its the only logical course of action. But instead he comes to a gaming website. One with hundreds of thousands of users. If he was so ready for a change, or if he wanted his life to have meaning, he would have sought it by now. Asking for help is hard, but its nearly as easy as simply googling depression symptoms and cures, or how to man up and live life, instead of whining about things that are immaterial. If he was a paraplegic, who contracted leprosy from a rabid monkey bite, he might get my condolences, but over trivial things like not reaching out to make friends, or keep them, or even to make a meaningful effort at life, just reeks of failure to me. Society has become too tolerant of people who refuse to take part in their own life. It's my two cents worth , and i have no doubt that people will get offended, however it seems like thats what these forum topics are geared towards.

 

[ProZack]

If you really didn't care, and felt as though your life had no meaning, you simply wouldn't have made a forum post about it. You're just pretending to be apathetic, when in reality you are hoping that this might foster a faint glimmer of attention or hope. Do what most adults do, suck it up or step off the ride mate

Wow. Ok. So... yeah. How about this- when someone asks for help and vents about something, DON'T assume they're doing it as a childish grab for attention and DON'T be rude.

Seriously, dude. Uncalled for.

Eh, it's fine, I would have suspected that too.

I know in some cases I'm getting worked up over nothing, but not all.

Snip

How would you go about trying to find why you don't care? I don't really understand.

 

[Andrew Record]

What i mean by that is maybe taking a closer look at your daily routine. Does your job feed into your apathy, do you feel as though you and your fiancee are falling apart? Is it the music you are listening to? Maybe you need to play hooky from work and go see a movie, or do some mini golf, or put together a lan party for counter strike or something. It might not seem like a lot at first, but once you examine whats bugging you and take a step back to look at it overall, then it might just help you not feel so trapped in your routine. Buy a puppy or something, animals can do wonders as more often than not, they help you build a bond and a routine outside of the norm. Or maybe get a pen-pal. Or even talk to the friends you already have. Invite em over for pizza and a movie or Nachos or something. Try anything. It might help you with finding out why you don't care. It might not. But its better than stewing by one-self, don't you think?

 

[HardkorSB]

I have been holding this is for a couple of months, and have become increasingly frustrated that I have no where to vent, so I decided to just at least type it out.

I have a boring monotonous life. My ideals are never challenged by hardship, nothing to strengthen my character, the same old shit, day in and day out. I can quite literally give you a schedule of my life for the past year. I absolutely hate it. I'd much rather at the least have suffering, pain, anything. At least with those you have a struggle to get over with.

I'm an emotionless shell of a man. If I woke up tomorrow with all my family dead, I wouldn't give a single fuck. My grandma died a couple months ago, a person who raised me since I was born, who always gave me smiles, and I didn't shed a single tear. I wasn't holding them back either, they just weren't there.

I have no will to live, save a single thing. A girl who lives approximately 2,000 miles away, the only friend I really have, and I'll probably never see her in my life. She hardly talks to me now, and in hindsight, I should have seen this coming from miles away.

I'm fucking tired of it all. I want to get my life in order, but what life do I have? If I died only a handful of people would care, but I couldn't care less about those people.

I hate feeling like I'm the only one going through this, because I know someone else went through this too.

I know what you mean. You just go by, day to day, not really caring about anything around you. It's like your life is just a movie that you hate but you're forced to watch.
It's not even like suicide is an option because you still have that tiny unreasonable hope that there might be something worth living for just waiting for you around the corner and you don't want to miss out on it. Plus, you don't want to die. You want to live and enjoy life. The enjoyment thing is just not happening at the moment.

I was thinking of posting something similar on some forum for the people to read and facepalm themselves but you've beat me to it so there's no point in doing that now, I suppose.

I also remember half of my family dying and me not even shedding one tear. I even remember my aunt dying right before my eyes, suffering from lung cancer. I was thinking "This is supposed to be horrible, I'm supposed to be devastated by this" and yet I was almost not paying attention to it (as much as you can not pay attention when something is happening in front of you). I was thinking of the things I was going to do later that day, like get high and work out.

I like life in general. I also like people. However, when I look at everything around me, the way our society works, the things we're supposed to aspire to, what we're supposed to want and need, I don't seem to care. Sure, I'm doing SOMETHING with my life, I'm moving it forward but there's no real drive, nothing to really push me to achieve something. I have to push myself. Sometimes it works but most of the time I'm just like "Why bother?"
I guess that you're just supposed to take the world like it is and try to make the best of it but I don't feel like that will satisfy me.
Maybe it's just me but I feel that even if I had a ton of money, loving friends and family, perfect health and all that shit, I would still be somewhat unhappy because all you can hope to achieve in this life is a ton of money, loving friends and family, perfect health and all that shit. I still would be the same fucked up person I am now.
Maybe that's the problem. Maybe the problem is that you are you. Maybe if you could completely change the way you think, it would solve everything. Can we do that? Do we have the technology? Can I pump myself full of medical products so that I can Be a different person, without becoming a vegetable? Does this make any sense to anyone?

I don't think I'm any good at this point. You see, I have mod swing and I have them often. Right now, I'm going through my "down period", as I like to call it, and it's hard for me to give any kind of uplifting advice to you.
The best thing I can say right now is... you're not alone.
Don't let that comfort you, it just means that we have a similar mental illness

 

[hooksashands]

There is an oft-repeated phrase in counseling: Help me help you. Meaning if you want us to care, you have to care. It's not a lot to ask that you give a shit about yourself, amigo.

First of all, I know a bit about what you say when you tell me you love someone thousands of miles away. I'm infatuated with this girl currently who lives all the way in Australia, while I'm in the US. We've been good friends for almost 5 years, and she laughed once and winked at me on Skype, her mom talked to me, I felt like I was introduced to her immediate family from across the ocean. Her mom laughed at my jokes and seemed to enjoy me, and said at the end of our call that she wouldn't mind me eloping with her daughter... in a joking, but still-a-little serious way that I would have been an idiot not to pick up on. This happened last August, and in that time I longed for her, I longed to travel that distance and spend my time with that girl, know her, know her family, be prepared to love her as no man in her life has.

But then I realized something. I hate to tell you this, it breaks my heart, but here is the reality of your and my situation: We have no idea what life will be like with them. Growing up with someone over the internet and living with them suddenly, breathing in the same space as them each night, waking up with them each day... this is terrifyingly different. You must be prepared mentally, physically, and (if you believe in that kind of thing) spiritually. You must be willing to impress her with who you are, not what you appear to be.

I am not telling you don't go after this girl. Quite the opposite, I am telling you to refrain from calling on her in your time of need, and instead maintain stability... Gather your prospects. Surely there is something you're good at, something you might have even been put on this earth to do. Be strong, be patient. Everyone around you may die, but you yet live. This woman could be the one, the true lifelong partner who understands you and will love you for who you are, not just what you aspire to be. Work hard, sing your story, and then go to her. You cared enough to ask our advice, our help, so I'm telling you this: swim against the current.

 

[Marcus Kehoe]

Do something, if not for yourself then for others.
Find religion
Do charity
make it so you feel even if your-life isn't worth it you can make others better. You can do A whole lot of good.

 

[DeadlyYellow]

Join the fucking club.

 

[Edd4224]

To paraphrase the eleventh passage of the Dao De Jing: the unseen thing is what makes us useful. So find that unseen thing, that one feeling. Don' t try to explain it because if you can do that you haven't found it. Find it, hold on to it and never let it go. It is there if you look hard enough.

 

[ProZack]

There is an oft-repeated phrase in counseling: Help me help you. Meaning if you want us to care, you have to care. It's not a lot to ask that you give a shit about yourself, amigo.

First of all, I know a bit about what you say when you tell me you love someone thousands of miles away. I'm infatuated with this girl currently who lives all the way in Australia, while I'm in the US. We've been good friends for almost 5 years, and she laughed once and winked at me on Skype, her mom talked to me, I felt like I was introduced to her immediate family from across the ocean. Her mom laughed at my jokes and seemed to enjoy me, and said at the end of our call that she wouldn't mind me eloping with her daughter... in a joking, but still-a-little serious way that I would have been an idiot not to pick up on. This happened last August, and in that time I longed for her, I longed to travel that distance and spend my time with that girl, know her, know her family, be prepared to love her as no man in her life has.

But then I realized something. I hate to tell you this, it breaks my heart, but here is the reality of your and my situation: We have no idea what life will be like with them. Growing up with someone over the internet and living with them suddenly, breathing in the same space as them each night, waking up with them each day... this is terrifyingly different. You must be prepared mentally, physically, and (if you believe in that kind of thing) spiritually. You must be willing to impress her with who you are, not what you appear to be.

I am not telling you don't go after this girl. Quite the opposite, I am telling you to refrain from calling on her in your time of need, and instead maintain stability... Gather your prospects. Surely there is something you're good at, something you might have even been put on this earth to do. Be strong, be patient. Everyone around you may die, but you yet live. This woman could be the one, the true lifelong partner who understands you and will love you for who you are, not just what you aspire to be. Work hard, sing your story, and then go to her. You cared enough to ask our advice, our help, so I'm telling you this: swim against the current.

Thank you. This helped a lot.

Snipitty von Snipinstien III

With that movie analogy, I guess we're sitting through a really shitty beginning hoping for it to redeem itself. In which, I hope it get's better sooner, I'm getting bored of all this crappy cliché stuff.

 

[Saltyk]

Don't feel bad about not crying. I could probably count the number of times I have cried in the last 10 years on one hand. And still be able to perform some functions with that hand.

But like others are saying, you have to help yourself. Depending on your age, this can vary. If you're in school, try talking to a counselor. Even if you're not, speaking to a psychologist couldn't hurt. Go to college or find a new job. Learn to cook, if you don't know how. Try meeting new people.

Here's a small piece of easy advice, no matter what. Enjoy the little things. Stop for a milkshake, buy your favorite candy or snack food, cook your favorite meal, or whatever you want. Just do something that you enjoy for no other reason than because you enjoy it.