Video Game Hell

[Xprimentyl]

Ok, so you left the house one afternoon, got run down by the #2 bus going south, died and woke up in video game hell. What flavor is your suffering?

Me? My ball sac is clinched in a white-hot vice grip and the only way to release the pressure and cool it down is to play overly complex real-time strategy games. My opponents are MLG-level experts and the only way I?m able to make it barely competitive is by purchasing boosting items via microtransactions. I can barely read any of the data on my HUD because I?m playing on an 19? SD tube TV from the early 2000s. I don?t have a controller or keyboard-?n-mouse because the only option in my video game hell is a Kinect 2.0. Lastly, in between RTS matches, I?m constantly plagued by the feeling of explosive diarrhea, but to get access to the nearest toilet, I have to call Ubisoft?s CEO and BEG him to make another Assassins Creed game.

 

[Silentpony_v1legacy]

Video game hell is obvious. You're at the arcade, you got 99 tickets, it's 5mins to closing, there's a grand prize of 1 Saving Grace to Heaven for 100 tickets, and you're out of quarters.

And every now and then Pyramid head shows up to rip your skin off.

 

[PsychedelicDiamond]

It's a dire place where only multiplayer game exists that I have to play on a badly functioning controller while the worst of angry nerds call me a variety of racial and homophobic slurs, none of which apply to me. Every once in a while satan would hand me what appears to be a game with a single player mode, only to have it permanently disabled. Also, for every match I lose Bethesda releases another game in the real world.

 

[Saelune]

Phone sport games and doing ANYthing requires microtransactions.

 

[American Tanker]

Two words: MARIO PARTY.

 

[Xprimentyl]

Also, for every match I lose Bethesda releases another game in the real world.

Can't tell; is that a good thing or a bad thing? Assuming you've no access to the real world (being dead n'all,) are you saying it'd be hellishly ironic that Bethesda would release games you'd have no access to in accordance with what I'm assuming would be your poor multiplayer performance?

Phone sport games and doing ANYthing requires microtransactions.

Hey, Super Stickman Golf is moderately entertaining, but it does have microtransactions, so like all mobile games I humor myself with, I eventually hit the "pay to proceed" wall and deleted it from my phone. Now I just stick to Solitaire and Sudoku.

 

[PsychedelicDiamond]

Also, for every match I lose Bethesda releases another game in the real world.

Can't tell; is that a good thing or a bad thing? Assuming you've no access to the real world (being dead n'all,) are you saying it'd be hellishly ironic that Bethesda would release games you'd have no access to in accordance with what I'm assuming would be your poor multiplayer performance?

No... it means for every match I lose people in the real world have to suffer.

 

[Lil devils x_v1legacy]

play overly complex real-time strategy games. My opponents are MLG-level experts and the

See, now that is one of my favorite things to do.. I guess one persons hell is another's heaven? XD

 

[Xprimentyl]

No... it means for every match I lose people in the real world have to suffer.

Hey, they gave us Morrowind!

play overly complex real-time strategy games. My opponents are MLG-level experts and the

See, now that is one of my favorite things to do.. I guess one persons hell is another's heaven? XD

Indeed; feel free to take my place should these hells of our own making come to fruition!

 

[Angelous Wang]

Video game hell.

When the last collectable is bugged, and you just sit there endlessly trying to un-bug it or endlessly re-checking every other collectable location just in case you already got this one and you are wrong.

But you will never get it.

 

[Imre Csete]

Working on the ultimate cookie-clicker, timesink microtransaction mobilephone game.

With Facebook integration.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

Having to play one of those MOBA's with a really toxic community where they constantly yell in my ear about how much I suck and I can't turn the voice chat off.

 

[kitsunefather]

I can play all of my favorite games, but only as poorly made mobile phone app knock-offs.

 

[Arnoxthe1]

 

[Veylon]

play overly complex real-time strategy games. My opponents are MLG-level experts and the

See, now that is one of my favorite things to do.. I guess one persons hell is another's heaven? XD

In Heaven, everyone studies the Torah for all eternity.
In Hell, everyone studies the Torah for all eternity.

 

[DraconianMod]

Have to play PUBG permanently with a standard setting that goes -network lag detected- during the parachute jump which makes it near impossible to pick a drop zone, then when the chute opens and you're near the floor, land just next to the roof, get stuck in the air having to 'cut the chute' to land with damage on the floor whilst everyone around me is already looting guns and obviously I'm sitting there waiting for the buildings to properly be loaded oh and my shotgun shells don't kill anyone in close range whilst some bloke misfiring his SMG headshots me from across the map.

 

[jademunky]

Me playing anything released in Japan in the last 15 years that was not developed by From Software.

Or ever having to get back into a MOBA.

 

[FalloutJack]

Video game hell is obvious. You're at the arcade, you got 99 tickets, it's 5mins to closing, there's a grand prize of 1 Saving Grace to Heaven for 100 tickets, and you're out of quarters.

And every now and then Pyramid head shows up to rip your skin off.

Come on, there's always someone who drops or forgets a ticket.

Bethesda

*Snerk*

OT: There can be only one video game hell, and that is to be sent to Doom Hell to die a million times, and you're not Doomguy.

 

[Lil devils x_v1legacy]

play overly complex real-time strategy games. My opponents are MLG-level experts and the

See, now that is one of my favorite things to do.. I guess one persons hell is another's heaven? XD

In Heaven, everyone studies the Torah for all eternity.
In Hell, everyone studies the Torah for all eternity.

So true. Can you imagine constant jabbering nonstop for all eternity?! I am one of those who have to have good periods of silence everyday to keep my sanity.

 

[Drake the Dragonheart]

getting to play my favorite RPG's, but everyday the save data gets erased and I have to start all over. nothing kills a game for me more than to have put hours into a character or characters and then BAM have to start from the beginning.