Vote Puppet Cthulhu!

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Robert B. Marks

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Jun 10, 2008
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Yes, I am proud to announce that Puppet Cthulhu has announced its candidacy for the post of Member of Parliament. If it gets your vote, it promises to:

1. End the issue of softwood lumber by destroying all the forests and reducing the whole of North America to a radioactive wasteland.

2. End the war in Iraq by bringing forth the Great Old Ones who will drink its oil and consume its people, also reducing it to a radioactive wasteland.

3. Step on its constituents itself when the Great Old Ones return, rather than letting them or a lackey do it when the world is reduced to a radioactive wasteland.

4. Ensure that heating bills are brought down to a minimum by reducing the entire city to a radioactive wasteland (radioactivity is warm, you know).

5. End corruption in Ottawa by sacrificing all of the politicians and reducing parliament to a radioactive wasteland.

6. Create a fund for the preservation of radioactive wastelands.

When the time comes, vote Puppet Cthuhlu! In his own words:
"MhrmmhrmmHRMM!"

This message brought to you by the Committee Leading to Elect Puppet Cthulhu to Office (CLEPCO). Why settle for a LESSER evil?