What do you really know about Australia?

[Sproingy]

Everyone inevitably mentions the Sydney Funnell Web. If you don't want to meet it don't go to Sydney...seriously though we've had funnell webs in our garage (we currently have a red back problem there) they've popped up around our yard as far back as I remember. I have never been bitten. They tend to stick to their webs (LOL) I'm not an idiot and don't stick my hands in the webs. As long as you check shoes and you pay attention to where webs pop up and spray often you're not gonna be hassled by our spiders...

I've been attacked by a Wombat and chased by a Kangaroo though. Nothing too scary you just run like hell and hope there's a tree or a car you can hide in before they get you. Both were when camping and we'd mistakenly camped near an animal trail so i don't blame them...

Also Cassowary FTW!!

 

[GrizzlerBorno]

I heard of that event some time ago when the Australian Navy dragged a captured Korean Drug running ship, out into the middle of the pacific........and subsequently bombed it with B-1B Lancer's armed with JDAMs.
On LIVE Television, no less! (as a warning to Drug-cartels trying to get drugs into the country)
That made me fall in love with Australia.

Also, Street sharks.

What else do i NEED to know!

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

Plus an Aussie mate of mine grew up near this little town in the outback where a load of people ended up on smack, and in a rare show of liberalism the local government effectively stopped enforcing laws against softer drugs like dope and psychedelics in order to curb this problem. It worked. Kinda. Now it's full of hippie types, has an annual joint-rolling festival and the police station has an elaborate hallucinogenic mural on the front that they can't be bothered to take down. Sounds like fun.

Nimbin was a hippy haven since the early 70s... the smack problem they had was in the 90s and had mostly to do with the 'feral' movement (weird combination of enviromentalism and punk stuff).

 

[Leviathan_]

- Island which was used by Britain to send all rapists and criminals to.
- Aboriginals who get high on petrol all the time, making them hated by said colonists
- Lot's of fastfoodstands, rivals the United States on unhealthy food
- Great barrier reef
- Floodings
- Annoying accent
- Dat large red rock in the middle of Australia
- Pick-up trucks and 4x4's everywhere
- Sydney's Opera building thing, designed by that one guy
- It's where that TV series All Saints comes from
- Cooking shows, cooking shows everywhere.
- Kangaroo's get run over by cars all the time. So badly that the Australian government clears the roads from dead kangaroos every once and a while.
- They hate L4D and violent video games in general
- Almost no one lives there despite the fact that the country is fucking huge
- Australia often makes fun of Tasmania just like the US does of Canada
- They celebrate Christmas and New Year in summer (Seriously, what?)
- Hot as fuck
- Capital is Sydney... Right? Not sure about this one.
- There's also Melbourne, Brisbane and Darwin that are pretty important cities
- Beautiful landscapes and nature
- Crosshaw lives there if memory serves me correct
- Vegemite (which is by far the most disgusting thing I have eaten in my entire life) is popular there
- Big ant nest things
- Boomerangs and didgeridoo's (Or however you spell it)
- Awesome crocodilehunter guy who died a few years back


Words cannot describe how much you look like the US


I've never been to Australia, but I've read quite some books about other countries in my life.

 

[Wintermoot]

1. it has a delicate and unique eco system
2. its a very dangerous country
3. its mostly desert
4. it has that politician guy that wants to ben violent games
5. it used to be penitatiary colony of GB
6. Yahtzee lives there
7. Steve Erwin is from Australia
8. the Sniper lives there

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

I heard of that event some time ago when the Australian Navy dragged a captured Korean Drug running ship, out into the middle of the pacific........and subsequently bombed it with B-1B Lancer's armed with JDAMs.

Australia has never had B1-Bs or JDAMs.

It's likely that, if it was Australia, they were F-111Bs firing anti-shipping missiles

 

[Superior Mind]

I work for an Australian firm working with Australian media. It is what I do for a living. This being the case I'd say I know a little more about Australian than most.

Coming from New Zealand I can't really give a 'wider world' opinion of what Australia means. Australia's in the same position as New Zealand really, constantly proving to the world that it matters but failing, in most cases, to get the world's attention. Hell, most people seem to think the world ends south of the equator.

I have no issue with Australia. Despite the rivalry between us we all remain good mates and I see it as a pretty cool place despite the fire, floods and pestilence.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

-snip-

Wow thats a good point the Gillard versus Assange QLD v.s SA maybe a bad comparison though. I don't know whether you used that because you thought I was foreign but Assagne's accent isn't that apparent. Of course other people can tell that hes Australian but in Queensland no one would say he had an accent(atleast not a strong one). I find the Queensland accent to be more of the stereotypical one though. SA accents stick out heaps to me but I thought that it was because I am Australian and could tell them apart.

Gillard's accent is a mash of SA, 'Cultured Australian' and Melbourne accents. She's doesn't use the dark l as much as regular croweaters do and some of her vowel usage isn't right for the SA accent. Oh well, at least she remembers that castle rhymes with arsehole and not hassle.

 

[SnowyGamester]

Fun Fact, Michael Chamberlain (Azaria Chamberlain's Father) (the Baby eaten By the Dingo) is a wonderful man and an english teacher, Also the most famous person I have ever personally met.

That guy taught me 7th grade English. He let the class dick around quite a bit which was always fun. He never brought up that incident though...I didn't even realize who he was while he was still teaching at my school. Still have no idea what happened with all of that...

OT:
- Internet here SUCKS! It is slowly improving but still costs a butt-load.
- Importing cars has a 40% tarriff, so they also cost a fortune...
- It is currently summer, and it was freaking hot today! Like 100 farenheit? hot.
- Pies here are generally full of meat. I mean, who puts fruit in a pie?
- There aren't herds of kangaroos roaming the streets, at least in the day-time. There are quite a few at night though, at least in some rural areas. Also they can't talk. And they're too small to ride.
- There are suprisingly few aborigines.
- We make some fucked up horror movies (see The Loved Ones and Wolf Creek)
- There are quite a few dangerous critters, and they're suprisingly easy to come across. I could go outside right now, pick up a few rocks/bricks and find a dozen or so redbacks. Though they're problably less common in the city.
- Fucking Doomsday Arcade (has everybody forgotten that?)

Meh I'm bored

 

[Mister Swift]

*horrible shameful post*

BISCUITS. THEY'RE FUCKING ANZAC BISCUITS!

My great grandfather didn't kill a bunch of Turks and Arabs in World War One just so kids today could get culturally polluted to the point they started calling biscuits 'cookies'. No, he did it for shit and giggles because he was a violent, alcoholic German immigrant.

Like all true Australians he was from overseas.

Oh god. I'm going to stand in a corner for a while. I can't believe I said that.
I'm going to invoke the 'tired from work' excuse. (Yes, I did work on Australia Day. Holiday rates!)

Also, I was born here. I have a noticeable accent and I've never even traveled overseas.
Now I'll stop defending myself and stand in my corner.

 

[olicon]

You know the craziest thing about Australians? They're so lost in the world that they have to iconize and glorify anything and everything that is even remotely Australian.

Australian news is the only one that I have seen to report a driver's nationality over his team. Seriously--who gives a frik if Driver X is from Australia? Well, Australians do. The rest of us only cares that he drives for Ferrari.
Same thing for movies, music, the arts, and everything else. When Heath Ledger died, every single news outlet in Australia keeps reminding us that yes, he's an Australian (or was it someone else? I couldn't be bothered to care), not that he's a good actor. X-Men: Wolverine? AUSTRALIANNNNNNNN (nobody even gives a crap if it's a good movie or not. All I hear about it is that it stars an Australian).

It's cute in a way, and it goes really far to show that Australia is such a peaceful (and uneventful) land, but damn, this takes it too far sometimes.

 

[InfiniteSingularity]

I work for an Australian firm working with Australian media. It is what I do for a living. This being the case I'd say I know a little more about Australian than most.

Coming from New Zealand I can't really give a 'wider world' opinion of what Australia means. Australia's in the same position as New Zealand really, constantly proving to the world that it matters but failing, in most cases, to get the world's attention. Hell, most people seem to think the world ends south of the equator.

I have no issue with Australia. Despite the rivalry between us we all remain good mates and I see it as a pretty cool place despite the fire, floods and pestilence.

Wanna chup brue?

 

[Natdaprat]

It's like a quarter of a mile from the surface of the sun. The average temperature at night is usually the type of temperature I'd be going to the beach in.

 

[guntotingtomcat]

Eight out of ten of the most poisonous spiders in the world live there.

That's all I need to know.

You might also need to know the nearest location of a padded room with enough rape whistles and printed articles from Cracked to sustain you because you are clearly a misinformed baby...want a nice bottle baby? In all seriousness when it comes to dangerous animals they're mostly out in the bush (and despite countless hikes and camps through bushland I've never seen anything more threatening than the odd blue-tongue or fly, and I've seen more of the harmless buggers in my backyard) and things which Cracked would have you believe (for humour) breed like rabbits and hunt us coast-huggers like funnel-webs and blue-ringed octopuses are fairly uncommon, you're probably only going to get injured severely if you're deaf to the odd shark alarm, blind to the animals minding their own damned business or too slow to ring 000 and get some anti-venom if you do get bitten or stung, hell, the most dangerous creature I've ever had a brush with at the beach is a blue-bottle, just leaves you with a sting that dies down with salt-water.

As an Australian we're a good nation with a bad (undeserved) rep and an uninteresting history. When it comes to games I honestly think we're better as gamers than most of the world, nonono, that's better in the sense that we never ***** as much as you Yanks when we're paying around $100 for a new-release and you guys have the hide to moan when a new AAA title costs you a mere $60, not to mention playing online with an Aussie is a humourous time.

Edit: It sure is nice to see the amount of Australians saying nice things about this pla-oh wait, no...Aussie aussie aussie?

Okay, first. I am Scottish. I would be paying in £, not $.
Second. My friend told me he twice had to leave the toilet because of a black widow in the sink. In a hotel in Sydney. On the second floor.

You do have an OUTSTANDING accent, second only to ours, natch, and Sea Patrol is my favourite show at the moment. But you couldn't pay me to go to Australia. I would rather take on a bear than have to deal with any spider, let alone one that can kill you.

 

[Alima]

Hum, in addition to what has been mentioned..

My country imported one of your tasmanian humpbacks to become a princess and our future queen.

 

[SckizoBoy]

The market at Hobart is awesome... oh damn, I'm turning into an old fogey

 

[Radelaide]

I think they recently lost some sort of sporting thingy, a couple of weeks ago. Some big thing they get all worked up about. Apparently they used to win it a lot but they just don't anymore.

What was it called again?....oh yeah, The Ashes.

(sorry, couldn't help myself).

One day series, my friend.

I know that I have the most Australian name in Australia So beat that~

 

[Bobbity]

We have camels! No, seriously. We also have huge problems with rabbit and horse populations - people sometimes quite literally mow them down with machine guns in order to reduce their numbers - and highly poisonous Cane Toads. Although all of those animals are imported, they're also doing their very best to completely fuck over our ecosystem.

 

[Ocoton]

Being from New Zealand, I can proudly say that it's "just a small backwards island off the coast of New Zealand" to quote you.

 

[ezeroast]

Australia is the America to New Zealand's Canada.
This is what I know.

I know what your saying but i have no idea how your saying it