Alright, so two days ago my mother died. This has easily been the hardest part of my life, let alone having to think about the fact how I have to survive these next two years with a family I don't trust.
Something struck me, though, something that just keep coming up.
I don't believe in destiny or anything like that, I don't really believe that everything happens for a reason, but the other day... I'm just not sure what to think.
For a while now, I've really wanted to read the book Nineteen Eighty-Four, so that day my dad took me to the library, Ironically built in 1984. So I rented the book, and we went back to our house. (We were gone about 15 minutes). When we returned, my brother and sister told us they thought my mom had a stroke, my dad called 911 (This wasn't the first time she had had a stroke), and about an hour later my dad called us and told us to come to the hospital. When we got there, they wouldn't let us see my mother until she was pretty much gone. I told my dad what I found Ironic about the book was a quote I had heard so many times from it.
"Sometimes", she said, "they threaten you with something ? something you can't stand up to, can't even think about. And then you say, 'Don't do it to me, do it to somebody else, do it to so-and-so.' And perhaps you might pretend, afterwards, that it was only a trick and that you just said it to make them stop and didn't really mean it. But that isn't true. At the time when it happens you do mean it. You think there's no other way of saving yourself and you're quite ready to save yourself that way. You want it to happen to the other person. You don't give a damn what they suffer. All you care about is yourself."
How appropriately this quote fit was beyond me. I'd be so ready to pass whatever happened to someone else without thinking anything about it, I wouldn't give a shit about what the person suffered, what their family suffered, All I wanted was my mom to be okay.
The most Ironic thing was this. My brother told me that one of the questions on Jepardy (My mom's favorite show, he was watching it with her) Had Nineteen Eighty-Four as it's answer.
A few of my favorite bands write lyrics inspired by the novel, too.
It's not a coincidence anymore. I just can't take anything more out of this.
So forum, what do you take out of this, and do you have any experances like this, where something just keeps coming up, and has stuck with you?
I expected this book to mean nothing.
Something struck me, though, something that just keep coming up.
I don't believe in destiny or anything like that, I don't really believe that everything happens for a reason, but the other day... I'm just not sure what to think.
For a while now, I've really wanted to read the book Nineteen Eighty-Four, so that day my dad took me to the library, Ironically built in 1984. So I rented the book, and we went back to our house. (We were gone about 15 minutes). When we returned, my brother and sister told us they thought my mom had a stroke, my dad called 911 (This wasn't the first time she had had a stroke), and about an hour later my dad called us and told us to come to the hospital. When we got there, they wouldn't let us see my mother until she was pretty much gone. I told my dad what I found Ironic about the book was a quote I had heard so many times from it.
"Sometimes", she said, "they threaten you with something ? something you can't stand up to, can't even think about. And then you say, 'Don't do it to me, do it to somebody else, do it to so-and-so.' And perhaps you might pretend, afterwards, that it was only a trick and that you just said it to make them stop and didn't really mean it. But that isn't true. At the time when it happens you do mean it. You think there's no other way of saving yourself and you're quite ready to save yourself that way. You want it to happen to the other person. You don't give a damn what they suffer. All you care about is yourself."
How appropriately this quote fit was beyond me. I'd be so ready to pass whatever happened to someone else without thinking anything about it, I wouldn't give a shit about what the person suffered, what their family suffered, All I wanted was my mom to be okay.
The most Ironic thing was this. My brother told me that one of the questions on Jepardy (My mom's favorite show, he was watching it with her) Had Nineteen Eighty-Four as it's answer.
A few of my favorite bands write lyrics inspired by the novel, too.
It's not a coincidence anymore. I just can't take anything more out of this.
So forum, what do you take out of this, and do you have any experances like this, where something just keeps coming up, and has stuck with you?
I expected this book to mean nothing.
