Where does your self-esteem come from?
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What little self esteem I have comes from donating. I am type O-Negative and so far, I've donated 16 units of blood. Since coming to college, I give almost every time the restrictions are lifted. I also give a larger than normal amount to charities and help out people when I can.
Otherwise, the rare compliment. I tend to dismiss them, but it's the thought that counts.
Otherwise, the rare compliment. I tend to dismiss them, but it's the thought that counts.
I'm almost surprised that nobody said this.
My self-esteem is dependent on whether or not girls like me or give me attention.
When a girl is talking to me or joking around, I feel great. When I see a girl I like is talking to another guy, I feel sad and jealous.
I've never had a girlfriend and am considerably depressed. And it makes perfect sense to me that getting a girlfriend would make me feel good. Why shouldn't it? I'm sad because I don't have one, at least that's what I tell myself.
My self-esteem is dependent on whether or not girls like me or give me attention.
When a girl is talking to me or joking around, I feel great. When I see a girl I like is talking to another guy, I feel sad and jealous.
I've never had a girlfriend and am considerably depressed. And it makes perfect sense to me that getting a girlfriend would make me feel good. Why shouldn't it? I'm sad because I don't have one, at least that's what I tell myself.
I don't have much self-esteem, what with my inferiority complex and "there's always someone better" mentality. What I do have comes from the fact that I do quite well at school, reaching an 80-90% average with very little effort. But honestly, I would trade most of my vast intelligence and ability to solve problems for the raw creativity required to create something new and be truly original. That would really make me happy.
You can be intelligent without being creative, but I don't think you can be creative without being intelligent.supersupersuperguy said:
ot: Self-esteem doesn't come from looking down on others, it comes from not having to look up or down at others. It is the strength of being a truly autonomous individual, of having worth that isn't relative to what all the other assholes in the vicinity are doing.
Personally, I consider myself a moral person, and a lot of my self-worth is tied to that. It makes me feel good, and not because I feel I am somehow better than a immoral person. I don't scowl upon those I consider less virtuous than myself. I am grateful that I am in a position (rich and white) where it's relatively easy to practice virtue, and I pity those who have to resort to the poison that is vice just to survive.
I suppose self-esteem is the ability to look another in the eye and to not be afraid of what he thinks.
I am exceptionally well endowed. That and the fact that I actually am better than everyone else.
Also, your teacher sounds like a fucking hack. Makes up some bullshit strawman and tries to claim most people are like his fictional example. Sounds to me like he's projecting. So it's clear that that is where his self esteem comes from.
Your teacher is really a nazi.
Also, your teacher sounds like a fucking hack. Makes up some bullshit strawman and tries to claim most people are like his fictional example. Sounds to me like he's projecting. So it's clear that that is where his self esteem comes from.
Your teacher is really a nazi.
What little (and I do mean little) self esteem I have comes from my ability to adapt to situations and fairly strong intelligence, as well as a pretty good ability to lead people I think. Not to mention the fact I come into most situations with little bias, giving me an outsider's prespective. Though that's somewhat due to the fact I have no soul.
The problem is that this is slamed down by my horrible memory, lack of happiness with my body, various 'interests' that many would say are bad and make me a bad person by extension, and lack of ability to really enjoy anything or interact well with others. Not to mention being a bit of a sociopath. All these come together to crush any chance of self-esteem.
The problem is that this is slamed down by my horrible memory, lack of happiness with my body, various 'interests' that many would say are bad and make me a bad person by extension, and lack of ability to really enjoy anything or interact well with others. Not to mention being a bit of a sociopath. All these come together to crush any chance of self-esteem.
either your teacher is a simpleton, or he wanted you to figure out that there's nothing stopping a person from being proud of thier accomplishments or abilities without comparing them to others.
if i accomplish my goals, solve problems, strengthen my body or mind, make progress; i can feel good about myself.
there's a motive behind the pride people get from oppressing other people that has much deeper and darker implications than mere self esteem.
if i accomplish my goals, solve problems, strengthen my body or mind, make progress; i can feel good about myself.
there's a motive behind the pride people get from oppressing other people that has much deeper and darker implications than mere self esteem.
Personaly, I think I get my self-esteem not only from knowing my strengths, but my weaknesses.
It sounds crazy, I realise, but think about it this way: I admit that I have both strengths and weaknesses, in relation to other people. Therefore, when I compare myself to people, my strengths help me gain self-esteem. BUT, when I end up shown up due to my weaknesses, my previous admitance of said weaknesses keeps me from losing the self-esteam I have. Or, at least, that's how it goes in theory.
As for needing to put people down? I think you can get away simply with putting some aspects of a person down, without putting the person his/herself down. If someone has a weakness where I have a strength, I will class myself better then that person in that ONE aspect, but never would I class myself better then that person, period. So, you don't have to put people down - just aspects.
It sounds crazy, I realise, but think about it this way: I admit that I have both strengths and weaknesses, in relation to other people. Therefore, when I compare myself to people, my strengths help me gain self-esteem. BUT, when I end up shown up due to my weaknesses, my previous admitance of said weaknesses keeps me from losing the self-esteam I have. Or, at least, that's how it goes in theory.
As for needing to put people down? I think you can get away simply with putting some aspects of a person down, without putting the person his/herself down. If someone has a weakness where I have a strength, I will class myself better then that person in that ONE aspect, but never would I class myself better then that person, period. So, you don't have to put people down - just aspects.
Well, that's kinda true. My self esteem can come from the fact that I know I'm better than some of these punks of the current generation. Honestly, I look at many of these people and say "Wow, you just look like the biggest asshole, and you probably are". So... freaking... often...
Buuuuuut, the majority of my self esteem comes from the fact that I care about others, and am (usually) willing to listen to any problem (unless it's horribly petty, like some rant about how your mom didn't let you go to a party or something). I'm a caring, sensitive, and very interested person, and I like to reach out to those in despair. These traits raise my self esteem greatly. That, and I don't entirely care about what others think. I am who I am, so if you don't like it, move along, and let me talk to someone I care about, be it a friend, or a stranger who just needs someone to talk to.
I'm there for people, and even though some stories can be sad, heart breaking, or even full scale ruin my day/next few days, it brings me great joy to know I've helped someone in pain and sadness. Seeing that smile... Hearing such gratitude... Makes me always remember, I am a caring person. And no-matter what turn my life takes, I doubt anything will take that away from me!
Buuuuuut, the majority of my self esteem comes from the fact that I care about others, and am (usually) willing to listen to any problem (unless it's horribly petty, like some rant about how your mom didn't let you go to a party or something). I'm a caring, sensitive, and very interested person, and I like to reach out to those in despair. These traits raise my self esteem greatly. That, and I don't entirely care about what others think. I am who I am, so if you don't like it, move along, and let me talk to someone I care about, be it a friend, or a stranger who just needs someone to talk to.
I'm there for people, and even though some stories can be sad, heart breaking, or even full scale ruin my day/next few days, it brings me great joy to know I've helped someone in pain and sadness. Seeing that smile... Hearing such gratitude... Makes me always remember, I am a caring person. And no-matter what turn my life takes, I doubt anything will take that away from me!
That's me exactly. No matter what it is I try, I'll pour everything into it and then I'll look over at the guy next to me and find he's done something 3-5X better with what seems like half the effort; so my self-esteem remains in the dirt.TehCookie said:
My constant need to be right, even if I know I am wrong I will argue until the other person will aknowledge me being correct.
I used to have okay self esteem because someone would compliment me on a daily basis even though I'd never believe them. I don't think I'm intelligent at all, I think I'm a lot stupider than most people actually. I get quite a lot of people criticising me too, if not at work then when I get home which doesn't help.
I'm a lot uglier than most girls too but that never used to bother me. Now, however I keep hearing a fair few people say I'm too fat or my bum is too big or my hairs a mess so my confidence has hit rock bottom at the minute.
I don't look down on people, because I'm probably a lot lower than they are anyway. [sub]Apart from people on Jeremy Kyle D:[/sub]
I'm a lot uglier than most girls too but that never used to bother me. Now, however I keep hearing a fair few people say I'm too fat or my bum is too big or my hairs a mess so my confidence has hit rock bottom at the minute.
I don't look down on people, because I'm probably a lot lower than they are anyway. [sub]Apart from people on Jeremy Kyle D:[/sub]
Which is why that is the best show in the world to watch when you're having a bad day. Sure, you had a bad day but it could always be worse.EeveeElectro said:
Technically, if your success rate is higher than your failure rate, it's possible to have high self-esteem without looking down on anyone.AwkwardTurtle said:
Well, if X makes you happy, you can say that it's good for you. There doesn't need to be a Y.AwkwardTurtle said:
Well, yeah, that's kind of true. Most people don't want to be different because then, they can be noticed. The easier it is to notice you, the more likely it is that someone will hate on you. People don't want to be hated. If there's nothing about you that sticks out, you won't be hated. To avoid being hated, it's best to be bland and generic. Blandness is forgettable. People won't hate on blandness because they won't even remember it.AwkwardTurtle said:
It used to come from the fact that I was the only man in a friendship-group of girls when I was a teenager, so everyone naturally thought they might fancy me at some point or another because of hormones and shizz: so I felt like the king of the pride.
Then, years later, I realised I actually have the face of a man who had his skull shaped by rock-hammers and impatience but - you know what? - after years of having friends who regularly greet me every morning with "good morning, you ****" I'm safe in the knowledge that I am immune to insults.
Then, years later, I realised I actually have the face of a man who had his skull shaped by rock-hammers and impatience but - you know what? - after years of having friends who regularly greet me every morning with "good morning, you ****" I'm safe in the knowledge that I am immune to insults.